Day 1 for anyone just starting out

[Justdonthavethefirstone]

Hi all. This is my day 1. I have joined some other threads for support but thought I would start a new one for anyone just starting out on this journey. I have a drink problem. It got worse over lockdown.i have had day 1 before and failed but this time I am starting off prepared. I have books to read. I have joined Mumsnet for support and have told my family and friends.

Night light - DSAATN star projector with super timer lol. Amazon 22 quid

Oh no a water leak, plumbers are so hard to get. At least everyone is wearing masks Lol at you looking at the light. I had to lie beside yer man and head rub and all that shite but the light is great and now I have graduated to outside his door and sit with my kindle.

I'm just keeping the head down with C19, couldn't be arsed going anywhere except work and the odd shop. All sorts of parties going on here.

Im meant to ask @writing how are you now feeling about your weekend? Its bloody terrific your DH is going AF too. Health kick is a good one. I've no plans or anything to go out but I'm just going to say, that I was tipping away during lockdown and decided to stop for a month but it went so well and I feel great that I'll continue on for the moment. I said this sort of thing to an acquaintance the other day (testing waters) and got a lot of nodding 'oh I should do the same' good luck with it anyway. I think I'd cry but it would be such an achievement

I'm feeling super lazy too @Rupertpenrysmistress Even though I am running and yoga-ing, I am far lazier in the mornings than I was before which is weird. I think I'm sleeping more although the last two nights I have been awake for a couple of hours in the middle of the night which is annoying. I'm pretty crap at the yoga, some of the girls there are so bendy, my body doesn't want to get into half the postures.

Well done for not caving @OrchidJewel you are doing SO well. You are my muse(tte). I think I drink more in the summer usually so hopefully the winter will help, althought it is quite depressing, especially with fucking coronavirus. ARGH I hate it and this nonsense rule of 6 is so ridiculous. We are a family of 5, so basically from Monday we can only meet up with a single person when we are altogether. And if I went to see my parents, I'd have to leave H or a child at home. Yet 6 adults from diff houses can all go to the pub. It's so stupid. Did you find "nina is not ok"? Let me know what you think of it. It is a strange book - uncomfortable reading.

I didn't even know cases were spiking in Surrey @Ynwa1234. I am only down the road (depending on where in Surrey you are). I thought we were low here. I am so bored of it all, I haven't really been keeping up to date with the stats though. I used to look every day at the beginning of this but have lost interest!

I went to Torquay once when I was little too. Went to the model village. Ah nice memories. Cornwall is so nice, we have been a few times in recent years, body boarding at Watergate Bay, its lush there.

Since there are a few of us in the SE, I suggest we meet at LHR and fly over to Ireland for a girls weekend! Surely is fine as long as not more than 6 of us

My ds has a star projector night light, he loves it. Don't think has a timer though, I turn it off when I go to bed!

I haven't managed to get "into" Love Island USA yet, I need to put in more effort. I watched some of the first one but the ad breaks annoyed me and the first is a bit dull with all that stepping forward shit. Plus H won't tolerate it so I have to watch on my own which is hard to fit in.

Pffft laughing at the bloody neighbours turning off your water!!! Erm water is kind of essential! What you gonna do?! It is defo times like that the alcohol is calling.

I'm feeling ok about the weekend still, the not drinking part of it anyway. Still nervous about the others. We have been told arrival from 4.30pm (as most are travelling a bit to get there), and we were thinking maybe get there like 5.30 so others are merry and maybe won't notice as much!! Maybe will just say having a month off cos caned it too much in lockdown.

I've been walking my ds to school each day and walking to collect him and my steps are so much better. Not through wanting to sadly, my H's cars petrol cap won't bloody open so he has been using my car and his is running on empty so haven't dared to use it in case it runs out. We dropped it at the garage this morning as he is WFH today and they said it was probably something-or-other which will be £250!!!! FFS. FML.

I thought there was a test centre in my town but someone said today there isn't anymore and we need to drive like 40 mins to get a test which is a bit mad. It's not as if I live in the middle of nowhere.

My eldest had one via post a couple of months ago, she got a letter asking her to be in some trial or other. They came and picked up the test by courier. I don't even know if I did it correctly, I read if you don't hurt them a bit by putting it up the nose then you haven't put it far enough. So I'm not sure I put it far enough. But anyway she had no symptoms and at that stage we had seen, like, nobody for weeks so fairly confident she didn't have it and of course it came back negative.

Glad the 7 is happier and school next week for your youngest hurrah. It's been about 1000x easier to wfh with no children here for me.

Dear god I reckon I would have cried at ripping out the whole kitchen and dining floor. What an absolute nightmare. Glad chocolate helped a bit. I am loving chocolate at the mo and keep eating it secretly so h and the kids don't nick it!

That is why your FIL is loaded I guess😂

Drinking Sesh is tomorrow night. I'm getting nervous but have a bottle of AF fizz and some cans of seedlip stuff to take. Hopefully it will be ok. I hope I'm not bored. They are my Hs friends more than mine and every time I've seen them before I've been/got drunk.

Ha no brads or chads sadly. Just a Carrington. I might try and watch some on the way up north tomorrow to catch up.

TFIF. This weekend is going to fly though. At least I won't have a hangover tomorrow though. I'm meeting an old friend at 7am to walk for an hour then walking home and going to running club with another friend. Like a proper sober person 😇

Good morning campers! I survived last night and miraculously nobody even knew we weren't drinking. We took an eski with drinks in, said we thought the fridge would be full. Then we were all in the garden and they had a little office/bar thing in their garden with a fridge in so people were just helping themselves to drinks so was easy just to get stuff out of coolbox. I drank a whole bottle of fake Prosecco, a couple of seedlip cans and a ginger beer. I didn't feel tempted and this morning it's so nice to feel ok. I had a crap nights sleep but even so feel 1000x better than I would have otherwise.

I actually think we're onto something here! Not drinking is BRILLIANT. I am literally amazed by this news.

Ps day 20 whooppppp

Pps how is everyone?! Hope all ok

Hi writing well done to you. It feels amazing to get through something like that doesn't it. How did you find the seedlip cans? I have had seedlip but not tried those. I am 5 weeks today and have had a few similar tests and am finding them easier to deal with,it definitely helps to know what you are going to drink rather than think about it whilst everyone else is choosing alcohol.

@Rupertpenrysmistress the seedlip cans were good, I had two diff types although I don't know which ones they were. In a big glass with ice and a slice it does have an alcoholic type kick to it. Not even especially nice tasting but anyway...
It def requires planning ahead, i would have found it so much harder if I hadn't taken anything and so been forced to drink squash or water all night. Well done on 5 weeks, that's brilliant.

@Ynwa1234 urgh sounds streeessfull. Don't stress about the one cig, I think you're amazing doing booze and cigs at the same time. And I don't think 1 cig is the same danger level of taking you back to square one as 1 drink does. Get back on it, chalk it up to a stressful day and carry on.

The corona testing thing is a nightmare. Apparently the advice is keep checking back to the website. Someone that lives near me said they are trying to get one and one day the website said the nearest place to go was Dundee, a mere 8 hour drive 😂. They looked later and there were no tests anywhere and they looked the next day early and got one 20 mins away. So keep trying. I mean, it's probs not cv anyway 🤞

Get an early night and look tomorrow. Hope you feel better after a decent sleep. I need an early night too, so tired after late night and rubbish sleep. Work tomorrow 😭

Well done on getting through the weekend @writingsonthewall! Sounds like it was a big success, definitely think its about planning. I've got some of the seedlip cans, I quite like them. I might splash out on a bottle at some point as would probably work out cheaper.
I don't think the IF is for me, if I don't eat in the morning I get hangry and if go to sleep remotely hungry I can't sleep.

I've put some of the money I'm saving from not buying wine towards a PT on Zoom once a week. Bloody hard work but I'm so lazy I need someone to push me.

I love LI! I've started watching the new USA one, am multi tasking actually and have it on in the background while I catch up on the thread. Was also so sad about Caroline Flack, it was so shocking and must be so hard for her family.
And I think someone mentioned married at first sight before. I've not watched the recent one but have seen a few series. I'm a nightmare for googling to see if the couples are still together though and spoil it for myself. I watched one of the USA ones with DH and had to pretend I didn't know the outcome.

I hope your DS is OK @Ynwa1234 sounds like a super stressful time, I'm not surprised you had a cigarette.

I'm on day 22, had a bit of a wobble on Friday, PMT, tiredness and my 3yo acting up. I shouted at her, a lot! And then felt so guilty.

Loved the book recommendations before, I'm a big reader. I've just started Richard Osman's book, The Thursday Murder club. Its good so far. I'm also a John Marrs, just finished his new one The minders. I read that The One is being made into a Netflix series.

Hope everyone else is doing OK. Loving the mini heatwave!

Urgh @Ynwa1234 hope your 7yo feels better soon. Such a nightmare when they've not been back long. And double ugh that your H is under your feet too. I don't like Mondays (tell me why). Hope the day whizzes by and your dc is ok to go back tomorrow.

Well done on your PT @hazelnutmochi I am too scared to get a PT, I don't like pushing myself too much - it is tiring and hurts! I probably should though, to make me do the stuff I don't want to do.

I'm just catching up on a bit of LI USA as well! I've got it on my phone whilst I am working, so I'm only half listening but tbh that is all that is required!

Also loving the weather, might go and sit outside and work in a bit. Chin up everyone, onwards and upwards

For a few days after my first session I was hobbling around like a little old lady.

Morimg everyone, still.plodding along sober as a judge

writing that is so impressive you went away and NO drink. Your made of.stromg stuff. I have that book on my kindle, and actually hazel tempted by Richard Os book, why is everyone reading it? Lol. And a PT is genius to spend alcohol money in. Ymna, how on earth are you doing the smokes on top.of the drink?

Funny rule that 'rule of six ' you have. We are six so would be seeking no one. There seems to be such a difference between UK and Ireland. We are on the rise, especially Dublin BUT I only know 1 person who has had to get a test, I know people wouldn't exactly tell you but any close family, friends definitely haven't and no one off school or creche. I cant put my finger on it iykwim. There is a worrying upsurge so why are we not going for tests

I'm dreading the winter gloom and boredom, I do normally like winter, excuse to stay in the warmth and fecin drink. I STILL have found my winter hobby or goal.yet and I will have too.

Anyway hope everyone else is doing good. (Strong arms with muscles clenching lol)

I definitely don't think some peace and time to yourself is too much to ask @Ynwa1234 I think its so important. Have you tried vaping? One of my friends got off cigarettes that way. Whatever it takes to stay off the booze though, that's my motto at the moment.
Its going to be a nightmare this winter if we have to self isolate with every cough or cold unless we can get a test.

Morning folks, another day sober I was just reading a very sad thread on this board. Its certainly a reminder to me about how alcohol affects your relationships, how you can lose everything. Keeps me stronger and more determined.

Ymna I get that totally, he is using all that as an avoidance of dealing with his kids. Your right that time is so short with them and enjoy them young. We have just started doing up lists of important shite that needs to be done (once a week and ongoing down the road) this then gives me a plan for the week, weekend etc and we both factor in our downtime. It then means if he was painting a fence I'm not in that plan I'm working on DH actually spending more time with the kids, all he does is tuck them in (after I have done the dramatic bedtime) that's really sad. I'm working on changing his mindset. He always was a workaholic but wfh means he never gets away from it.

He used my drinking as the excuse of why he stayed upstairs but I can see that's bollicks now. It's a slow process but getting there.

At the weekend when I'm not working I might start a couch to 5k with my daughter and maybe 7 year old. This has 2 benefits. After that I am goal less for the winter ahhh..

Oh god @Ynwa1234 men can be so thoughtless. Well obvs women can too, but men seem to do it more often! You are so right that they aren't little for long. My eldest is almost 15 and I look back at the days when they were young and wish I'd played a bit more. My little one still has a bedtime story and god knows I can't be arsed to read to him some (a lot of) nights but I literally force myself as it won't last forever and it's a bit sad when it's all over.

I tell you this nonsense better all be over by next summer. I feel like this year has been a total waste of time. I had so much fun stuff planned, weekends away, gigs, festivals, holidays and all of it was cancelled. It sucks. Now it looks as if Christmas might be impacted but to be honest we never do anything much anyway so I'm less bothered about that. And if I don't have to go to the work christmas party sober then that's fine too! Although would be quite a novelty to wake up the next day and not have to wonder if I've still got a job.

The testing thing is utter bullshit. My boss has her daughter home from school with a cough and can't get a test and she isn't allowed back without a negative test. My boss says she has a cough for weeks and weeks every winter so this winter is gonna be a car crash. So far so good here but any day one of them could get a fever or cough or someone at school could get a +ve test. Although maybe not if nobody can get a test hahaha, at least they won't be able to send us all home.

Do you have to isolate for 2 weeks then ymwa?! It's crazy.

Ah yes defo do the C25k @OrchidJewel. If you did it on your own then it's precious thinking time awy from the kids, and if you do it with them then it's family time and you're getting them fit so everyone is a winner. I am a big parkrun fan, not that its on at the moment obviously but when it's back then the kids like them, either the saturday 5k ones or sunday junior 2k ones. They say they might be starting back end of October so fingers crossed, although I can see that going to shit if cases keep going up.

And you don't have to be goal-less. You stil have your sober goals after all. And could aim to do a 10k in the spring.

I'm off to running club tonight with my friend who confided in me on saturday that her husband had had a breakdown and had been drinking vodka secretly all day at work for a few months (wfh). Bloody alcohol. It's got a lot to answer for.