Day 4 of giving up alcohol

[Saltypotato]

Hi all,

I am on another thread that started in Jan and is still running. We all started together and the support was immense, it was the only thing that got me through the first month. At the end of Jan/beginning of Feb I started having 'just the one' and we all know how that goes if you have a problem. The group are now at 100 days and whilst I love checking in they aren't at the starting stage I am at the moment.

Lockdown has meant I am out of routine and haven't had a reason to keep my drinking under control (no work, not driving etc) so after drinking every night since it began I ended up passing my last full bottle of booze to a friend a few days ago and making an attempt to give up.

That was a few days ago, I am just starting my day 4. It's been easier than I thought as there isnt the option of just popping out to the shop so I'm not taunting myself. I have got a bottle of vodka and one of gin in my amazon cart that I keep hovering over buying but its on a few days lead time so I don't want it to arrive when I'm a week in and undo my hard work. That thought is stopping me.

But we have to go out today for essentials and tonight I have a zoom call with friends in the "pub". I am really tempted to get something whilst I'm out and my brain is doing the 'oh you deserve it, its a stressful time' and 'you can just have two to join in' (from experience, I can't)

If anyone else is feeling similar or just started their journey into the wonderful world of tonic water please join me. Strength in numbers, right?

How is everyone doing?

Ghost that feeling if waking up without a hangover just never gets old, does it

SophieB Yesss to up days and down days . Except for me my mood seems to change by the hour! And I'm never quite sure if it's the not drinking, work, the lockdown, hormones. It's quite exhausting though isn't it.

Well done with the weight loss Edwina. I'm yet to see any physical changes but I know its early days. I'm definitely feeling better though.

Where are you @Saltypotato ? Hope you're ok.

I'm ok @Teetotallyimperfect, hope you are too. Better day today, I forced myself to do stuff -housework (blitzed the kitchen), gardening, ironing, boring stuff but felt better for doing it. Feel I've achieved something. Also did a lot of work on line, which I've been putting off. So more productive.

Hope everyone else is ok (bit too quiet on here, isn't it).
Without sounding patronising - if any of you have slipped, I get it. It doesn't matter, we won't judge. We understand, we've been there. Please let us know how you're doing.
Love to all.

Evening all.

I’ve been grouchy and had a headache over the last couple of days. Work is pissing me off and I’m bored and stir crazy and so bloody over lockdown!

3 weeks booze free today and it was the first day I craved booze momentarily. I had a sudden thought this afternoon after a stressful Zoom meeting for work... ‘I’d love a shot of something strong to take the edge off’. I was thinking about brandy, which is odd as I haven’t drank that in many years.

It was just a fleeting, petulant thought though. Feeling a bit better after a bath and cuppa.

I echo what @SophieB100 said. No judgement here for anyone struggling or slipping. This isn’t easy. We understand .

Hi ladies can I join you please? Day 1 for me and have read all of your posts, I identify with most of them..... have tried a couple of dry January's done well to day 20ish then that one drink leads to drinking g nearly every day for 11 solid months - sometimes starting pre lunch (most weekends) I feel dreadful about the damage I have done to my body, I've aged and am fed up with carrying the extra stone or so on my gut. I feel so much better off the booze, I just don't know why I can't do it for me and my daughter who deserves not to have a drunk mother most nights. Sorry for the me post - I'm going to look at some of the books and podcasts mentioned - I really want to get through one weekend sober..... but will take it day by day. Today I stayed sober! Hugs to you all and hope everyone is coping x

Yes advertising for alcohol is still big here, good day today washing and bed remade, arthritis being a pain though, bitter lemon last night loads, today just drank loads of decaf coffee.

@qwertyl, welcome, we are very supportive and we 'get it' on here, so it's great that you joined us. Well done on day 1. Take it a day at a time. The way I think is that we are all one drink away from day 1, however many days we've got under our belts.

@AvoidingTheWineAisle, hope you continue to feel better. Lockdown sucks. I had an awful 'woe is me' day yesterday, moping around in my PJs, wanting a drink...so today I forced myself to get up and dressed and get on with stuff today and it helped. 3 weeks is amazing. It's that bloody wine witch - you've got her on the ropes, so she's trying to throw the last punch. When I quit last year, she would pop up unexpectedly and taunt me. She won in the end, because she lulled me into thinking I could moderate. I know better now!

Well done qwerty! I feel similarly. I’ve managed tonight sober as well. Well done to everyone else, too.

I didn't think of booze for the first time last night - day 15, I usually have a first drink when I start cooking the evening meal. Was listening to a good podcast and I forgot to think about it.

My attitude is a bit different this time. We have tons of booze in the house, DH is a bit of a hoarder and we have an actual cellar, and he would prefer I kept drinking to keep him company and always assured me I don't have a drink problem, which isn't helpful! So it is partly feelings that no, this time no one else is going to dictate what or when I drink, and knowing that for my health and well being I should stop I am going to do what I want regardless of others.
The other thing I think is my age - old enough to no longer care if I am the party pooper, boring, the bored sober one looking grumpy in the corner and waiting for the chance to go home - nearly 70 life's too short to worry what others think, I'll do what's best for me now.

Thank for the welcome Sophie so many with similar feelings here, feels a nice little group. Well done aisle for distracting. I've had drinks on zoom calls in a beaker... I've trying to reason it's because I'm bored, or stressed or upset etc but in reality I'll always find a reason to drink and it doesn't take the edge of it, it numbs and then I feel 100 times worse the next day and repeat... thanks for posting edwina - my DH drinks a lot and we have loads of wine, gin, and other spirits in the house but I too just need to do this for me. If it transpires my DH doesn't like sober me then it may be something I seriously need to address! Congrats holy too - every dry day is better than a drunk one. Going to download a podcast or audio book today and get my hour walk in, maybe around trigger time good luck everyone and thank you for your support

@AvoidingTheWineAisle yes to the headaches and mood swings! Mine have been really bad from the afternoon onwards.. maybe it’s a thing?

And I totally get the fleeting thoughts - generally I’m fine then all of a sudden I’ll be like omg I would kill for a bottle of wine now! But it passes.

Day 16 over here. How did that happen?!

I had one of ‘those’ dreams last night too! I heard people talking about it and I was kind of like - I want one of those! (too give a motivation boost)
I drank so much, got lost, offended loads of people. It felt amazing waking up and realising it was a dream! Also that feeling of regret + anxiety, even in a dream, made me glad I don’t have that anymore!

I’m watching loose women right now, and Nadia said something along the lines of “alcohol is the only drug we feel we need to excuse for not doing” I thought that was fab! (Denise Welch is 8 years sober).

Welcome @qwertyl! Stick with us. We’re all in it together .

@Ghost, maybe it IS a thing?! I was talking to my AA sponsor today and she said giving up booze feels a bit like that exhausting, hormones-raging feeling of early pregnancy, which made me laugh and is quite true .

That’s mad about Denise Welch. I saw her in an after hours club/bar in London years ago and she was trollied and acting up. Of course I was completely sober there, standing in judgement (NOT!). Good on her!

@SophieB100 Having the wine witch on the ropes is a great image. That really made me chuckle!

Hey all. Just checking in- day 15 here. I agree, the wine witch on the ropes is a fantastic image! Love it

I'm on day 3. I'm managing ok, partly because I only have £3 in my purse! I was getting worried about how much weight I'd put on and how much I was spending. I'm ashamed to say I could easily do 2 bottles of white wine. I'm determined this time. I want to come out of lockdown a lot slimmer, healthier and much happier.

Well done all ladies, it's brilliant to hear how well you're doing* I'm determined to stick with you - day 2 for me patsypie* so no great achievement but at the moment every day counts. I feel the same about lockdown, in a way it's a great time to quit as no social events, no work events, no bank holidays, weddings or any other excuse I can find.... good luck ladies, if I can get through this first weekend maybe I could look to do all of May.... or one day at a time!

Two days is a good achievement-it’s what I have managed, too!

Well done Haggis in bed with my book and determined to do this. I started another thread on here before I found you guys and the stories of people giving up have really inspired me. Thank you lovely ladies

Morning all,
Hope you're ok. I'm still sober, still determined, but finding it hard. We had a bit of drama in our road yesterday, a few houses including lovely neighbour's were burgled over night - just sheds and garages. So we were all out and socially distancing trying to talk about it. Police cars up and down the road, police knocking on doors, all very dramatic! Unsettling and last night I seriously considered a few drinks to help me sleep. But I didn't, so something is starting to click in my little brain.

Have a good day all, and make sure you lock up! Police guy said that some houses near us were being targeted during day times, and one poor lady had her bag pinched from her kitchen worktop whilst she was in the garden.

Sorry to go off topic, but it's the only thing that's happened here for ages.

And well done to all of you!

Oh my goodness...the raging hormones of early pregnancy! That's exactly what it feels like. I've almost felt a bit unhinged at times but I think it's slowly getting better.

Edwina it's so difficult when you have a partner who wants you to keep drinking. It's good you're managing to focus on yourself and put your needs first.

Sophie that sounds very unsettling. I hope you're ok and well done for not having a drink

Welcome haggis qwerty and patsypie Loads of support here. It's nice having somewhere to vent where everyone else is in the same boat.

Day 17 for me. Had a fleeting moment yesterday when we were talking about when the pubs open and I thought "well, I'll obviously have to have a drink when we first go to the pub again" before catching myself and thinking No, you really don't! There are decades of hard wiring there to be undone!

Aaah @SophieB100 that does sound awful! Hope you are all ok and well done for not reaching for the alcohol.

@Teetotally why doesn’t it highlight you? Hmm.
Anyway day 17 for me too! I feel weird about it, like I’m struggling but I’m not? It’s hard to describe.
Rough day with the DC today as a result of boredom! I could kill for a bottle of wine. But I know I’m not going to IYSWIM?

Oh it did highlight you?! It doesn’t give me the option of clicking on your name so I didn’t think it would!

Also, I completely get what you are saying about the future things like the pub. That’s what’s tripping me up a bit too. Picturing all these things without the alcohol. I bet when it comes we’ll be fine. It’s the thought that’s hard!

I was also thinking that @Ghostonthedancefloor and @Teetotallyimperfect about life as 'normal' but I've almost achieved dry Jan and not drunk and also when pregnant, the problem is I wouldn't just have one and would be back to square 1.... well done on day 17 - it was so lovely today I really thought what would be the harm but I'm only on day 3 and I know what the harm would be....! Hope everyone has a lovely evening

Ah bollocks I caved tonight and had two thirds of a bottle. I’ve so enjoyed the last two mornings, waking up at a good time and feeling refreshed. I’m so close to being able to give up! It’s infuriating. I’ll start again tomorrow. Bloody well done to all who are still going!