Still stopped in 2020; a thread for anyone abstaining from alcohol.

[Drybird2020]

Dry January is over and the next phase has begun! Wherever you are on your sobriety journey, you're welcome here for encouragement, advice and support.

We love hearing from people who have been dry for a long time, so if you've swung by to have a look, please post to inspire us!

Equally, if you've woken up hungover, regretful and ashamed, determined that it's the last time, we've all been there and we're here for you now.

Lurky-lurkers, we know you're there! I observed the alcohol support threads for years before I felt ready to take the plunge, I hope these threads help others; if and when you feel ready to post, you'll get a warm welcome.

Might I respectfully ask that if your aim is moderation, you join the long running moderation thread in this topic. I find moderation chat difficult; it weakens my resolve, and many others feel the same.

I'm Drybird, 31 days sober. In that time I have saved 183 units, £192, and 12600 calories! I intend to be sober for the rest of my life, and I use this thread to keep me accountable.

It would be great to know how everyone is getting on, so if you'd like to check in below, please do! No need to share stats unless you want to, just give us a wave.

Here's tae us!

Omg this is just what I needed to watch. Annie Grace on what to do when you have negative emotions when you can't blot them out with drink. Need to practice her tips

Day 9 AF, work, gym, TV with lemon, honey and ginger squash with fizzy water and lime. Just a mundane day with nothing to report.

How is everyone else today.

Hello Foxes, Peaches and everyone.
Apparently I've saved 25.5k calories since I quit booze. That's a lot. Can't help thinking I should be seeing more results weight loss wise. I have been thinking about drinking, but purely with relief that I don't do it any more. I dont miss the minor irritants; garbage taste in my mouth, middle of the night thirst, low level tiredness and headache - let alone the major issues. I don't want to be a slave to anything and I can't believe I let it go on for so long.

Wowzer that is loads of calories. How long have you had dry again? I definitely remember one of the sober heros (Claire Pooley?) saying it was quite a while before the weight started dropping off, and even then it was slow (but steady).

I'm having a good week, feeling fantastic about being AF and having a drink is not appealing at all.

Got a very sociable weekend and am looking forward to connecting with friends and having conversations that are calm and steady that I can listen properly to. Also a bit overwhelmed at the same time, purely because my comfortable default position is within my introvert turtle shell and this weekend will involve PEOPLE. Feel good in advance about not drinking through it though.

I’m on day 61 and estimate I’ve avoided 30,000 calories, based on a bottle of prosecco or white wine per day (not literally every day but not far off).

I've estimated the same as Sparkling, averaged out my previous consumption to a bottle of wine a day although I'd often go a few days without any and at other times would have more. Day 64 here. Have a stinking cold which I am treating with the Jack Monroe recipe someone recommended on the thread, I can feel it doing me good 😊

Day.10 here, approx 7500 calories saved based on my bottle and a bit consumption.

Having a bad craving day but I'm also scared of wine now. So settled in with the cordial and not let the craving win.

Hope you feel better soon Drybird.

Pamela peaches, I understand the social anxiety I used to drink to get myself through it. Not sure why though as I have a job where I communicate all day sober, I chat to people at the gym again sober. I have coffees with friends and don't drink at family gathering as I'm usually driving.

I can talk a breadth of subjects so why the fuck did I drink to become an annoying twerp who people actively avoided.

Hi All. Just checking in on AF Day 7. Well done everyone on the zillion calories saved so far. I get the social anxiety thing too. I used to always neck a couple in the house before even heading out to social events just to take the edge off my nerves.
I had Nice day today and am pleased to get to week 1 (again!) . I got lots done in the house, baked a cake with DD and started a new yoga class. Back to work tomorrow just to ruin everything...oh how I hate working.

Hi everyone

It's good to see so many positive stories on here.

My last drink was on Christmas Day. It's not easy but I'm getting there. Very nearly caved last night and opened a bottle of wine after a horrible day, bit I'm so glad I didn't.

The longer I go, the less I want to break my winning streak. Day 62.

Same here Sparkling! Day 72 here.

Couldn't agree more. I wouldn't want to put myself through any of that again.

Day 65 here 😊

Well done gang. I'm trying a bit of low carb at the moment and it's giving me something else to focus on. Although, annoyingly, it feels as though I'm practically thinking of nothing else! Hope low carbing gets more automatic with practice...

Day 11, a my first trigger day, the family are all out this evening doing their own things and I'm bored.

I've been gym and put my PJs on to prevent me going out again for wine. I've always drank when bored but tonight's offering is pink grapefruit juice and sparkling water.

Well done on all of you that are 60 days plus and hopefully I'll get there.

Annoyed with myself! Twice in the last week I've had a drink because DH has bought drinks home & offered me one. I've been stressed with work this week and pretty much automatically said yes.
I'm not beating myself up about it because that'll just make things worse, but I'm annoyed because the 'starting over' part is the hardest, there's nothing like a grumpy day after poor sleep to make me feel like having a drink the next evening.

I need to be really clear with DH that I don't want to drink with him at home. I think a little part of me is scared of spelling it out because then there's no room for me to change my mind. Even though right now I'm convinced that's what I want (it's always easy to think that in the mornings isn't it?)

He's not sabotaging/controlling, he just doesn't experience the adverse effects of alcohol the same way I do, so offering to make me a nice drink when I look stressed is still a nice thing to do from his perspective.

I'm going to stock up on diet ginger ale and ice so that next time he offers I'll ask for that instead.

I was 8 days in, and caved! We ended up with wine in the house, so I indulged. Only a small glass with dinner, and another one a bit later, so I guess I can say that not finishing the bottle was a minor accomplishment. I haven't wanted any more since, so hopefully just a small blip. The feeling of good sleep and productivity is too good to give up, so I will work on addressing those cravings next time they hit!

Same, I'm trying to remind myself that I've had far more alcohol free days then in the past, and that when I have had a drink it has been restrained. But I don't want to moderate. I want a life where I don't think about the stuff!

Hi All. Did you manage last night ok Foxes?

I totally empathise Threeflying & Sweet. Having a drinking OH in the house is not helpful. My DH is always offering to pour me a drink too. (As I am permanently stressed). Thankfully I can resist his red wine pretty well. I will need to find more strength if he ever takes up Prosecco drinking! I don’t think I would cope with an open bottle of that in the house at all. I’m out at a show tonight, so looking forward to that. Have a good evening everyone.

Never been a fan of prosecco, but I do like mixed drinks (g&t or rum and diet Coke) it was the latter he's brought home recently! Trying to encourage to him to buy beer instead as although I did drink it I find it much easier to say no to.

Sorry to hear about the slip ups, three and sweet, but you both sound resolved to have another go. So many of us, me included, have experienced a few false starts as part of the journey.

It's certainly true that the first bit is the hardest, looking back on the first month I can now see how difficult it really was compared to how simple it feels now; drinking is something I just don't do - no drama, just a fact. And so much easier than trying and failing to be a moderate drinker.

Day 13 today, still drink free. I resisted Wednesday night and Thursday night.

Another first today, 10 hours of sober sleep last night. First time for a quarter of a century of reckon. Weekends were for partying when younger and lie ins with 3 small children never happened.

I'm starting to sleep properly now, go upstairs around 10.30, read a couple of chapters and ready to nod off by 11. I always kidded myself I could never sleep sober. But that's because my body had forgotten how to go sleep naturally

I'm sorry to those that have had slip ups. This isn't my first time of giving up. I've been lucky DH has decided to lose some weight so drinking us t on his radar and the eldest has been too skint to buy any alcohol after spending far too much on clothes.

Here's to another AF, non hungover productive weekend

Hurray, @Foxes157!!

After a good night's sleep I feel I can do anything. I'm glad for you that you're feeling this benefit, it's one of the best!

I do, I'm just annoyed my car's in for repair today so I'm housebound.

I can get out early tomorrow hopefully, off to do some clothes shopping and maybe a cheeky Macdonald's breakfast.

How are you getting in today?

How's everyone's sober weekend going so far? I've had a few days off work and it's really interesting the difference it makes, not been the slightest bit tempted despite going to the pub (for food, but DH having a drink) and DH having drinks while watching a film. It really is the mid week stress that gets me - booked some exercise classes next week so I don't have that worry. Was up and in the gym at 9 this morning, out for lunch & loving that I've still got plenty of the day ahead of me!

To be honest, I'm struggling a bit with a spell of being in a low mood and there's a very tiny part of me that thinks a glass or two of Sauvignon Blanc would lift it for a bit. I'm just back from the Tesco though and it's not going to happen but I used to be able to depend on it too.

I'm not looking forward to another sitting in. My 8 YO is away to a sleepover so this could have been a reason for me to go out for dinner with DH and/or 14yo DD but I can't be bothered.

I might go to the gym for a swim later. See if that helps.