High functioning and ready to cut down ? Anyone want to join me ?

[Tinkerbellx]

Hi
I'm not ready to go AF hence a separate thread ( yes I know I should do so sorry just being honest ) , but I'm in my late 40's, single parent and full time professional job .
2 at uni and 1 in 6th form and one still at primary . I'm juggling as many of us are .... the career/family/house / car . Along the way I'm now drinking a bottle of wine most nights . It's become a habit and I know it's making me ill .
I guess I leaned on alcohol throughout a long unhappy marriage / then the divorce and now it's become a habit .
The first thing mummy does when I get home is pour a glass of wine and then I feel myself start to unwind . Except I carry on .
My face is now feels puffy , my clothes are tight , my sleep quality is crap and so on .
I'm at a point in my life where I really need to take control as its my first opportunity in almost 27 years that I actually can .
I have an amazing partner now and we're planning on selling our homes imminently to move in together as a family . I want to have taken back control of this before then .
So I plan on not drinking during he week starting tomorrow .
I've stopped before and after the first night I remember actually enjoying it so I don't know why I'm so panicky ?
Does anyone else want to join me please ?

Can I join you all, similar story for me but been AF two nights so far and intend to carry on! Sleep has been awful, wine has been my friend for far too long and it's caused me to block out getting stuff done and the fuzzy feeling in the mornings is just far too bad to ignore now. I used to be able to take or leave it but over the past year or so that first glass of wine has been calling me from 5pm onwards 😬 life isn't great right now and it's a good escaping mechanism.. but I feel so bloody sh*t so something has to give. I'm absolutely determined to stick to this!

Well I’m totally failing at this, awful weekend. Will come back after work and catch up with the new posts.

So, I did drink this weekend, but it could have been worse.. Had a couple of stiff gin & tonics on Friday night and then stopped, rather than cracking open some wine. Woo! Had family round for supper on Saturday and had a nice relaxed evening. Alcohol was taken, but we all drank slowly, ate lots and drank much water. Between 4 of us, over 6 hours, we got through 5 bottles. Last night, to unwind and finish off the weekend, I had 3 stiff gin & tonics and then fell asleep on the sofa (having first eaten an entire bar of chocolate). So, if I hadn't had the last 3, I'd have been pretty happy with myself. I've also logged everything in the Drinkaware app, so now know I need to do better this week, and I took the first steps in that direction by saying to friends I was perfectly happy to drive to meet them one evening, therefore meaning I can't have a drink. I've also "hidden" all the chocolate that was left behind.

Hi everyone. Welcome newbies too. I didn’t post over weekend as I wasn’t AF and didn’t want to drag anyone down! Back on straight and narrow now it’s Monday. Having said that, I have reduced my intake, although my App says I had 21 units, which is pretty disturbing when I thought I was being pretty good. That’s me off it until Friday night. On Friday, sat and Sunday I had a G&T, a small bottle of beer and 1/3 bottle of wine. I am going to try Reisling next weekend as its lower in alcohol apparently.
@ ‘Itsallpetetong’ you can log on later and share your bad weekend! At least you are back at it....

Hello, do you mind another v. latecomer? I need to lose weight, and drinking wine is a major factor in that. I feel rubbish, I know I need to stop, but it has become the only way I can wind down from various family and life related anxieties. I'm not a sporty person, and need to find a healthy way to cut down on my drinking. I think I'm at a bottle à night alot of the time, but I can't be certain because we bring wine boxes back from France. Perhaps bl**du brexit will stop me! I have just ré read this and have decided it looks really bad. I only drink in the evenings, but once I start I can't stop! 😮

AloneLonely you didn’t let yourself down, you stopped rather than continuing. How have you done since?

MyRaGaia it’s good you are keeping busy, that itching must drive you mad. Google frightening you is a good motivator! Would it be worth seeing the dr & requesting a blood test just to check it’s nothing to be too worried about?

bert it is definately too tempting to sit on the patio drinking in the sunshine. The dropping temps may ease the temptation.

Notthebrady wow you are doing well.

iam I had the same reason as you for not posting. At least you are back to it now & drinking less overall is a win anyway.

ohwell how long does a box last? Not judging -honest. But you could roughly work out the amount per night. You are definitely right on finding something to help with the wind down. I feel my shoulders start to drop and relax as the first sip goes down!

Maude driving is a good excuse to not drink. I do find, when not drinking, I can eat my weight in chocolate.

I once read no one ever regrets not having a drink and it is so true. You don’t ever wake up in the morning thinkin ‘oh I really wished I had a drink last night’.

Welcome ohwell you are in good company! I think lots of us here turn to wine to cope with stress and anxiety.

I love I once read no one ever regrets not having a drink and it is so true. You don’t ever wake up in the morning thinkin ‘oh I really wished I had a drink last night’.
How true! But I never regret going to the gym either but I still don’t manage to go very often....maybe this super-sober week!

My weekend was not too bad, had a couple of V&Ts and a large glass of red. That's was spread out from about 6 till 11. I drunk less on Saturday, a small glass of red and Sunday 2 small glasses with a roast dinner. At any point over the weekend did I feel ropey or hungover and that's a big step for me. Back to AF in the week but we are off to France on Thursday, to a sporting event and it's a very boozy affair. I will try and limit myself but realistically I am away for 10 days so can't be pissed constantly 😂

I had some whisky last night, I guess 2 home measures, but that was it. No wine is in the house and all the whisky is gone so tonight will be AF as I won't get out of the office in time to buy any.

Evening all. How are we doing? Posts seem to be drying up a bit on here, which I guess could mean lots of different things.
I’m AF tonight and really pleased as that’s a hat trick of sobriety for me. I even managed to pop into shop tonight and resist a chilled bottle of white which was screaming ‘buy me, buy me’.
It’s not easy though is it? I guess I’m in a safe place here to say life can just feel a little dull without a drink. I feel that by the evening, my job and then tea-time domestic drudgery have worn me down and I feel I deserve a little fun. Chocolate only lasts the ten minutes it takes to eat it.
Anyway, have a great trip bert! How is tonight going everyone? Did last night go as planned alone?

iamyour have a read of the book Alcohol Lied to me. Its also available on audible. It might stop you feeling down on the AF nights or it might help you decide to stop drinking completely.

I'm not doing very well this week. My DH is away with work for 3 weeks, we're having a few issues with DS1 and we're having to work on his self-esteem and anger issues. Dealing with that, 2 kids and doing all the household stuff on my own - never mind that I actually have a job too - has meant a bloody long couple of weeks. I just feel like a glass or 2 of wine in the evening is my reward for surviving another day.... I drank quite a bit at the weekend as was staying with friends. AF on Monday, 2 small glasses tuesday, 1 small glass last night. I'm not even kidding myself that I'll stay AF tonight :(

I gave in once this week and had a few drinks, but less than I normally would. I'm feeling pretty good .

Omg I've had a really shitty day, running around trying to get everything ready for 10 days in our Motorhome, for the sporting event that my son is competing in but on top of that my other son had Chemo today so needed to be there for him .
While at the hospital I get a phone call from an absolute wanker telling me my contract with him has now been terminated . I was crying down the phone as I honestly can't take much more stress. It's a long story but we have a VW Camper van that hasn't moved In 6 years, its in a storage facility. I've had a mechanic over to look at it and I gave him the keys, so while we were away he could get her moving. The guy that own the facility knows this and I have been in contact with him constantly, but that's not good enough, so today he terminated our contract, now we have to move the VW immediately , well she can't move that's the whole point of the fucking mechanic 😠 I'm also now on route to bloody France ...on top of this I've had clients of ours who have an overdue invoices of 45 days shouting at me trying to track it down for payment . Well guess who is drinking wine while my lovely hubby drives to Portsmouth - yes me and I may have another one in a minute 😁😁😁. Sorry for the ramble . Have a good weekend everyone

@bert3400 oh that is all so epically shit. I am so so sorry. For me, I'd be drinking like my life depends on it. You are incredibly strong and brave and I'm not saying that I'm a trite way. It's true. I wish you and your family, especially your son, love and strength. You can't carry this all on your own.

Yesterday I drank a bottle of wine. Today I had raging cystitis all day long and consequently feeling sorry for myself.
My husband signed our separation agreement yesterday so I think that's why I'm so down. Generally demotivated. But....no booze today. Yay!
I'm in bed already to stop myself.

Ask @ScatteredMama82 I'm sorry that things are so hard. I guess all that any of us can do is our best and when that isn't good enough we'll, screw it. One day at a time. AF or not.

Sorry not read the full thread so it may have already been mentioned but if you look the drinkaware website, there is an app you can download to manage and reduce your alcohol units

There is also an unit measuring cup on the site you can buy for 90p which is a really useful way of measuring exactly how much you're drinking and makes it easier to reduce how much you're drinking

Hi All. Scatter and Bert and Alone I feel for you all having crappy, sad and stressful weeks. I hope things brighten for you all. It sounds like you are all doing your best in really trying times.
I have the Apps and the measuring cup too itsjeremy. I am getting used to it now I’m over the depressing realisation that 125ml is about a thimbleful of wine!

@Aloneloneyloner thank you. It's not so bad really, when you read about people who have their kids going through chemo, or separation like you are I realise I need to get a grip! Hope you are doing ok tonight, you mentioned that you hate your husband so hopefully starting to make the separation formal will be a good thing in the long run, although I can't imagine it is easy. Like you say, one day at a time.

@MyRaGaiaStarFishPieA good on you! Sounds like you have a good week, I aim to be more like you next week :) This week is largely in the 'fuck-it bucket' for me!

@bert3400 wow, what an epic bad week. I hope your journey to France goes ok and next week is better.

@iamyourequal the drinkaware app is ace. It's certainly helped me cut down quite a bit. I have a wine glass with the measures marked on it so I can't kid myself about what a 'small' glass of wine is!

Forgot to say, thanks for the book tip Northernsoullover. I am going to buy it ASAP as looks good. I have read one chapter (the freebie sample) of over half a dozen self help drink books and I think the message is slowly sinking in. Always being the one to take a drink at every opportunity doesn’t make me a fun, free spirited laugh who ‘works hard, plays hard’. It makes me a chubby middle-aged mum, with a growing alcohol habit and pent-up frustrations, who needs fresh purpose and interests.

Hi Scattered I had the drink aware app but ditched it for the ‘drink less’. It annoyed me that I couldn’t change the ‘drinkaware’ one to start on a Monday but I think it was actually the better app. I will change back on Monday!

Well done everyone I gave just started a diet some my wind down beer / g&t or wine is gone ... was getting in the habit of having one or two most night ... but diet means it’s a waste of calories and two drinks will make me tipsy and therefore head for the just eat app.
On day 2 ... once I get past the first week or two I should be in a better routine it’s my desire for any form of sugar that doesn’t help at this stage