Too scared to go for a smear test

[nervybs]

Hi everyone,

Just looking for a bit of a hand hold really.

I’m 26 and haven’t yet been for my first smear test. I’ve had some reminders and I’ve also been told I have to go into the GP for a medication review that they usually do over the phone, I am assuming this is so they can try and encourage me to go face to face.

I am absolutely terrified.

I was brought up by a mother who shamed my body and shamed anything to do with “privates” whilst also flouncing around naked herself. As such, I have a really difficult relationship with my body. The idea of a stranger seeing my intimate parts makes me want to die, which I know sounds so dramatic but it genuinely gives me palpitations and a nervous shake to think of.

In addition, I also have a very very low pain tolerance. I’m talking, pulled muscle in my neck brings tears to my eyes, level. So I am terrified that it will hurt. I know that they don’t provide any kind of painkillers or numbing for it and that terrifies me. I’m scared that it will hurt and i’ll be told I’m being stupid and they won’t stop.

I’ve seen so many horror stories online of women saying how awful and painful it is, and then it makes me doubt the ones saying it’s fine as them trying to minimise it!

I KNOW that having cancer is far far worse than the smear but I just really can’t get past these points and do it.

i was really hoping that the roll out of the home tests might mean I could do that but I’ve since read that they’re only for 30+ so would be ages before I qualify.

I’m just looking for some reassurance, someone to walk me through it maybe or explain how bad it truly is. I’d almost prefer to go in knowing “it’s going to really hurt” than be lied to and say it’s fine.

For a bit of additional context, my grandmother had a hysterectomy at the same time as having my mum due to complications, so never had a smear. So there isn’t anyone I can ask for personal experience other than my mother herself which I will not be doing

The embarssment is soon gone once you have yourself on the bed thinking at least I have been checked.
I always had a sjeet even tho they saw it all...made me feel less exposed.
Others stories and experiences are never the same as your own.
Its all no shame and who cares as the process happens..im easily qweezy but was prefectly fine.
The self test is more a worry...have i dabbled about enough to do it right feeling.
Rarher that than a mamogram...thats a sqaush pain i struggle to bare

Also make it a bit easier for yourself the whole dressing from the waist down is what I was nervous about (stupid I know haha) and I’ve had 7 children and when you are in labour honestly all dignity goes out the window but going for a smear well I was embarrassed so my advice, wear a long skirt or dress, means only quickly removing your knickers it’s quick and easy and takes a bit of the embarrassment factor away as you are still dressed. You will be fine, make an appointment go it’s over so quickly, it’s uncomfortable but not painful.

I’ve had loads and not painful, a bit uncomfortable but takes about 2 seconds. I had my first at 21 as I have endometriosis and lots of irregular bleeding so my gynaecologist asked for one. I ended up having high grade CIN which I needed treatment for. I don’t know if I’d even be here if I’d waited until 25. I had all of my HPV vaccinations in school too.

My GP books double appointments as standard for smear tests so it’s definitely worth discussing with your practise.

I’ve had 5 and honestly never found 1 painful I have had children if that makes a difference but I don’t know. The speculum is uncomfortable but definitely not painful, the swab itself feels almost tickly it’s weird definitely not painful. You’re covered with a sheet and don’t undress infront of anyone and please remember that this is far less invasive than cancer treatments, take someone with you if you feel more comfortable having a familiar face. It’s honest over in seconds less than a minute they swab as soon as the speculum is in and remove all at the same time and you can get dressed straight away.

I second the 'why'.

My friend didn't keep her cervix and they still do a smear- but even if you are right, it means OP's relative had a hysterectomy because of cervical cancer, which makes it even more imperative the OP has a smear test asap.

I certainly like the sound of that but nobody should stop having smears until the GPs tell us and give us the official new way of doing it. They will keep asking OP the op to go for that smear until it changes and I doubt they'll accept anyone saying they've used an unofficial home testing kit.

None of my smears have hurt and cancer treatment is much more invasive and painful op . Explain your fears to go and hopefully they will be patient and understanding.But honest it takes seconds and is so worth it .

I struggle now, I had one this year aged 46 and it was difficult but she said she could tell I was now peri menopausal and a month or so later I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia so that will be adding to my pain issues!

I just told them. It's now on my records. But anyway, the point is that the OP gets to know that she is clear, not the GP

Is it time that GPs offer gas and air.

I do not worry about smear tests or find them painful but I know many women do and therefore avoid going.

Gas and air works wonders for relaxing your body.

OP I would definitely speak to the GP about your concerns and perhaps ask if there’s any way to do it without needing to use the spectrum?

The more you do it, the easier it gets.

My sister had never had one and went for her first last month and said she doesn’t know why she put it off for so long as it wasn’t even that bad.

I always think that one time you might have a painful problem which needs investigating (or get pregnant) and it’s better to be a bit less anxious about it. I see the smear tests as trail runs.

I have had lots of smear tests. None have hurt. The nurses don’t even really look at your bits. They know where to insert the thingymajig and chat away whilst they are doing it. Honestly you have nothing to worry about. They will have seen more fannies than you’ve had hot dinners.
Unfortunately my best friend never had a smear test due to reasons similar to yours. She died 7 years ago from stage 4 cervical cancer age 43.
Please please do it 🩷

I am an absolute wimp by any measure. I have had mine regularly and I have never found anything of them painful at all.

I have had many over the years and agree with others who say it is no more than mildly uncomfortable.

You are probably building it up in your head as far worse than it actually is!

There's a saying: Feel the fear and do it anyway.

I think you will feel much better afterwards, knowing you have been tested and having been through the experience once as you are then in a position to make an informed decision next time

I always wear a long skirt or dress so I don't have to be naked from waist down etc. I shower before I go so I feel cleaner etc. I avoid boiling hot days as smear tests make me mildly anxious & a bit sweaty anyway. I have a tilted cervix (or something) so the nurse gets me to put my 2 fists underneath my lower back/bum to raise that area a little bit so she can inseet the speculum more easily. The time in my cycle can make the test feel mildly uncomfortable but it never really hurts properly. It is over very quickly too. The thought of having a smear test is always much worse than the reality. I've got one in 2 weeks time. Honestly you'll be ok x

Take paracetamol before you go

Oh, that is lovely! What a super gran you have. That sounds like a fabulous idea, do it

Im wondering if you are getting mixed up with hysteroscopy when you mention hearing horror stories online. There has been quite a lot of debate and controversy about these being done without proper pain relief. However, it is a completely different procedure, much more invasive than a smear, used to examine the inside of the uterus and take samples for biopsy, remove polyps etc. Would only be done in a hospital, A smear test just wipes a small sample of cells from the outside of the cervix, no going inside the uterus. I find them a bit uncomfortable but never painful and they are done very quickly. As other posters have said, tell the GP receptionist and the nurse that you are very nervous and they will do everything they can to put you at ease. They definitely won’t laugh at you and they will be very glad to help you get a very important test. Good luck

Its uncomfortable yes but so worth it as it reallh could save your life. Believe me there isnt a single woman who wants to get her fudge out for someone to put a medical devise into but its something that is so important. Take some ibuprofen before you go. Tell the nurse how nervous you are. I promise it will be fine

I assume you’re not a virgin? Time to be a grown up and get on with it. You’re really over reacting. Sorry to be blunt but it’s true.

Whatever cancer Jen had could have been detected early with a smear, her sister campaigned in colleges years ago urging young women to get tested as early as possible but she had it everywhere, it spread so rapidly.

Dear OP, I really feel for you. I don't like having smear tests at all, they are very uncomfortable and undignified and occasionally a little painful. But they are over in moments. So please please please talk to your GP about your fears and try to overcome them, the alternative is much worse (and will also involve discomfort and pain and invasive investigations). Best of luck. xxxx

Hi lovely,
I absolutely get where you are coming from and I felt very similar. A couple of things that might help:
When you book the appointment, tell them it is your first one and ask if they can book a slightly longer one.
When you have your appointment, tell the nurse how you feel and what you are worried about. They may be able to use smaller equipment to try and make it more manageable.
Take painkillers before you go.

If it's too painful, the nurse won't go ahead with it and will refer you to gynecology. It's a first for you but it's just part of their day to day so no need to feel embarrassment. The thing that finally got me to book my appointment and overcome the fear/embarrassment was my little sister. I want to be a good role model for her and part of that for me was showing her it was nothing to feel ashamed of by doing it myself. Can you adopt a confident, women leading women, feminist icon persona to make yourself feel more confident going in? It sounds stupid but I dressed up for the appointment and power walked to the GP and it helped feel less nervous 😂

No one loves smear tests but the amount if time you are in there is minimal.
Short term pain for long term gain is the way to think of it.

I know realistically that it is obviously so much better than being treated for cancer, but I just can’t get over the hurdle in my head. I wonder if I explain my nerves to the GP they’d let me have a longer slot so I don’t feel rushed/can have it all explained?

They explain what they are doing anyway.
Maybe take a pain killer before uour appointment if that would help.

Often there is another hcp in with you,and they often chat away about the weather and what you are doing later. Of course its a distraction but it works. The number of times I've said ' is that it' as soon as they e said ' all done' is unreal.

In 40 years I have never been sore .
My last one took longer than usual because I have rectal prolapse but even then it seriously wasn't a big deal.

They are pretty pointless now so I wouldn't worry about it just don't go and get an HPV test instead.

They don’t hurt, the speculum is smaller than a penis or a sex toy and they use lubricant.

If you are nervous then tell the nurse and they’ll talk you through the process. You don’t even have to commit to doing it, just at least commit to booking the appointment and talking with the nurse.

If you have cancer and don’t find it then the process to get better will be far more invasive than the smear.