Too scared to go for a smear test

[nervybs]

Hi everyone,

Just looking for a bit of a hand hold really.

I’m 26 and haven’t yet been for my first smear test. I’ve had some reminders and I’ve also been told I have to go into the GP for a medication review that they usually do over the phone, I am assuming this is so they can try and encourage me to go face to face.

I am absolutely terrified.

I was brought up by a mother who shamed my body and shamed anything to do with “privates” whilst also flouncing around naked herself. As such, I have a really difficult relationship with my body. The idea of a stranger seeing my intimate parts makes me want to die, which I know sounds so dramatic but it genuinely gives me palpitations and a nervous shake to think of.

In addition, I also have a very very low pain tolerance. I’m talking, pulled muscle in my neck brings tears to my eyes, level. So I am terrified that it will hurt. I know that they don’t provide any kind of painkillers or numbing for it and that terrifies me. I’m scared that it will hurt and i’ll be told I’m being stupid and they won’t stop.

I’ve seen so many horror stories online of women saying how awful and painful it is, and then it makes me doubt the ones saying it’s fine as them trying to minimise it!

I KNOW that having cancer is far far worse than the smear but I just really can’t get past these points and do it.

i was really hoping that the roll out of the home tests might mean I could do that but I’ve since read that they’re only for 30+ so would be ages before I qualify.

I’m just looking for some reassurance, someone to walk me through it maybe or explain how bad it truly is. I’d almost prefer to go in knowing “it’s going to really hurt” than be lied to and say it’s fine.

For a bit of additional context, my grandmother had a hysterectomy at the same time as having my mum due to complications, so never had a smear. So there isn’t anyone I can ask for personal experience other than my mother herself which I will not be doing

I had mine a few months after giving birth as I was overdue because I was pregnant (also had one before pregnancy) and it isn’t as bad as you would think. They put a paper towel sheets thing over you literally in and out. You can have a female chaperone to. It is obviously embarrassing but they literally see vaginas everyday and don’t care.

Add to that if it's uncomfortable you can ask them to stop while you regulate yourself and rrlax your muscles. They can take it at your speed

They generally don’t do under sedation except in gynaecology, but your GP might be willing to prescribe a one off dose of eg diazepam for you which you could take to relax you on the day?

They can also potentially refer you to have it done by gynaecology, but it might delay things further and would be good to get it done as soon as possible.

Otherwise you have a good strategy, have something to eat before and Ibuprofen if you are able to take that. You might have a bit of bleeding and cramping afterwards.

Sorry about your mother that sounds awful I’m glad you have found a supportive partner after the body shaming.

The nurse will do hundreds if not thousands of smear tests and only be interested in clinical examination and getting a good sample, they won’t observe from a lay person’s viewpoint.

I think it’s very variable by individual and timing eg in the cycle, but generally actually worse in older women, after menopause (especially if there is genital syndrome of menopause). One of my better smears was my first one at 18.

When I was roughly your age, I was absolutely terrified, but I still went to the hospital. When they called my name, I went in, got undressed and lay on the hospital bed with a sheet over me. As soon as I saw the speculum (it was a steel one, if I remember correctly), I literally fainted on the bed! 😬🫣 So the procedure wasn’t even done, and I avoided it for years afterwards 😅 Despite all the reminder letters and phone calls!
It wasn’t until my late 30s, after having my second baby, that I eventually had one done because I was experiencing a few problems down below and really needed to get checked.
Thankfully, the nurse was lovely, very calm and reassuring, and the speculum was a small plastic one. The whole thing was over in about 3 minutes! I was also lying in the foetal position (not sure if that’s why I found it less uncomfortable 😂).
I was even worrying about something as silly as accidentally farting while the nurse was doing the procedure! 🤦‍♀️😂
To be honest, a few hours afterwards it felt a little strange and uncomfortable, but I didn’t really care because I was back home and not in hospital!
Honestly, just bite the bullet and go for it. Do it for your own peace of mind and, more importantly, your health. ❤️

I did - and had always been given one. Expect for the last time. The nurse refused as she found the “bigger ones easier to use” and I’ve not been back since. It was horrendous. I felt so disregarded and it was so painful - I’ve had IVF so I’ve had millions of examinations in that area. Nothing hurt like that last time. And I say last time because I’ve refused to go back.

Hey @nervybs you can explain your fears to a GP and request a diazepam - not only will this calm you, it is also a muscle relaxant so will help the process. It is often given out to help back spasms for this reason (relaxant).

And as so many other helpful apps have said, it’s dealt with as modestly as possibly and is very quick! Good luck.

They absolutely will stop if you say so.
I am deeply feeble about anything that hurts, and I’ve never found that a smear test does. It’s a bit weird, but not painful.

A little bit of discomfort for the exam is better than if you don't get one and then get told you have cervical cancer and won't ever be able to have children ☹️ I hadn't had the test because I wasn't sexualy active at the time but the doctor said it doesn't matter you can still get cancer ❤️ trust me that surgery hurt way more than any smear

Could you make an appointment with a practice nurse to discuss it? Or are there online videos to show what will happen (I bet something like ‘This Morning’ will have covered it). I find it uncomfortable and awkward, even if you find it painful it’s only seconds, but it’s just a job to the nurse, she won’t make any judgement on you and it is quick.

This sounds a lovely idea.

Aside from that there is little l can add to other’s comments about how important it is and l’m sorry that your mother has added to difficulties here.

The whole process causes a little discomfort, not agony. It can save your life and there is no charge; look at it that way.

Smears do not hurt.

please dont think about ever having a baby will ypu

Smear tests do hurt for some people though.

Why shouldn't she? My auntie had 5 children with no problem but was still scared of going for a smear test.

Whatever horror stories there are online are lying- it can be uncomfortable I am told but personally I find it completely painless.
You are wrong about someone who has had a hysterectomy never having a smear they still test the cells in the area, my best friend had a hysterectomy and still has smears.
You are going to have to battle the way you feel about your body if you ever want to become pregnant.

Only if that person kept their cervix. If the cervix is removed (total hysterectomy) smear tests are no longer required.

I was sooo nervous about my first as everyone said how painful it was . The first bit was uncomfortable at most and then I didn’t even realise it was over it was so quick. I have had a few since and none have been painful you will be fine xx

I'm 37 and have had a few. They've never really been painful and are over really quickly.

Please be brave and go. My sister died at 32 from cervical cancer. She was too scared to go for her smear. She had to endure far worse things once diagnosed..

I’m 63 so have had a fair few smear tests. Not my favourite thing but only mildly uncomfortable. I’d suggest you take some ibuprofen and paracetamol an hour or two before your appointment and share your fears with the nurse or even receptionist when making appointment.
Having worked in a healthcare setting believe me you see every body type and become completely used to seeing “intimate parts”. Good luck and take your gran with you.

My beautiful sister died 14 months ago from cervical cancer. Please go and get your smear test. It’s uncomfortable at worst and not something I would choose to do for fun but it could save your life.

I have a ‘tricky’ cervix too! Higher up and further back than ‘normal’ Everytime I’ve been the nurse says oh we’re going to have to use an extra long one for you!

Why...?

Hi OP, honestly no one loves a smear, but they are a lot less uncomfortable now that a plastic instrument is used, vs the previous cold metal. They are over in a flash. Yes you usually get a very short slightly unpleasant sensation, but breathing and focussing your breath on the area makes a huge difference. All the nurses I have ever had have been lovely and I’ve had many investigations and things down there! Take some paracetamol before you go in, if you are very concerned. Honestly I would rather have a smear than have my teeth cleaned. As for people posting horror stories, well no one is going to watch a video of the usual procedure which is over in 30 seconds and is just fine.

They do give you medication if you are too tense to do it. This happened to a relative - she was told it is pretty common. I took her to her next appointment (because she

It sounds like you have issues with anxiety as well as your known issues about examinations. I would suggest contacting your GP to explain to them these worries and they should be able to better reassure you than people on the internet, they might hopefully also address your anxiety.. it's not fun living like this.

They don’t hurt, go have it done, don’t think about it before hand as in try not to give it much thought. I was about 25 when I had my first I put it off and off because well I was just nervous. I was asked at my 6 week check after having my twins I originally said no but then changed my mind as I knew I wouldn’t ever go back and I’m glad I did. It came back as pre cancerous cells and you know what if I hadn’t my life would be have been very different. So please just go get it done. It’s so quick and easy and not painful but it is important and so much easier than if you don’t and you end up having cancer when it could have been caught early. It really isn’t worth over thinking it I promise x