Help me with some good replies for rude men

[petitpasta]

Twice recently I've had negative comments from men when in gym gear.

For context I have lost nearly 9 stone and have joined two gyms and am enjoying weights, yoga, pilates and circuit classes. I'm still overweight and am still losing weight slowly. I'm a size 16 (down from a size 28 two years ago)

The first comment was in a shop when I called in to pick up a parcel on my way to a class. A man said "think you need to spend a bit more time in the gym love" and laughed at me. I couldn't come up with a clever comment but told him to fuck off.

The latest one was outside my house when I was heading out for a weights class and the guy laughed and said "don't think the gym is working for you sweetheart". The only thing I could come up with was to say "I'm getting more exercise than your brain is".

I'm not really bothered by the comments - they say a lot more about the men making them than they do me - but I would like a few more putdowns for these stupid men because I think they should be shamed for their comments and I think they're banking on me / women being too embarrassed to reply.

So, any good comebacks please?

I think you've nailed it with 'fuck off', TBH. Have a bit of faith in your instincts and don't waste your mental energy trying to come up with something clever - men stupid and rude enough to make these kind of comments are not going to be able to process anything intelligent.

“Go fuck yourself as nobody else will” worked for me

Excellent 👌🏻

I'd stick with "fuck off" too. Sums up everything that needs saying to idiots like the two examples you've given. Anything more is taking time that you don't need to spend on them.

Or alternatively just stare right through them and don't bother replying to them.

Where do you live? I live in a rough area in the shithole NE and I’ve never come across any man saying comments like this.

‘I can lose weight, you’ll need spend a lot of money for plastic surgery for that face you ugly twat’

I've never had a comment from men like this so can't help, unfortunately.

Did you ever look in a mirror?

best concentrate on your own body before worrying about others

well done on the weight loss

I find “yes dear” is quite patronising but fuck off will do

I was going to give you a nasty look but I see you already have one.

You are about as sharp as a rubber ball.

Or if you are feeling crude , your mother should of swallowed and saved the world from you.

Stay silent and stare at them for a few seconds to long then say

I was waiting for the punch line but I can see you are the compleat joke

A generally regarded to be nice, small city. We have a reform council which may have contributed to people's confidence to let the words in their heads escape. I've never had comments before but have had two in just a few weeks

“Thank you for your opinion random man!” Covers not just rudeness but times when men think they’re being helpful but they’re actually patronising, or the dreaded “Smile love”

Generally anything about their receding hair line. Not being able to grow it back etc.

Or looking them dead in the eye and ask them to repeat exactly what they said, again. Especially if there are other people around.

Option 1. "I might look like a brick shit house but at least I don't have an ugly mind."
Option 2. "If pigs could fly, you'd be Wing Commander."

I would completely ignore them, ignore their existence, walk away, don’t engage. Nothing. They are nothing.

While I understand the temptation to say something clever in response, I promise you nothing will annoy them as much as you completely ignoring their remark - as in, acting like you didn’t even hear it. Any reaction is a win to people like this. Leave the stupid thing they’ve said hanging in the air.

And congratulations on your amazing fitness! I’m so impressed.

"Sorry to disappoint you but that didn't upset me because you don't exist in my reality. Hope you have a nice day"

Or

"I very much hope your next shit is a pinecone"

Fuck off is absolutely fine.

Your tits are bigger than mine mate.

Smile and say “sorry I don’t get what you mean”

getting them to explain their “joke” is a foolproof way of making them look ridiculous . Especially if you keep smiling throughout and keep just saying “sorry can you explain what you mean”

I’m sorry this has happened to you. Some men like hurting women, they enjoy upsetting them.

I agree with PPs that Fuck off is perfectly reasonable however it does tend to give them what they want.

I usually smile broadly and say “thank you, I’ll give your opinion the attention it deserves”

If retorts don’t come naturally I wouldn’t bother. You need speed of thought to pull it off. Just give them a long, hard, puzzled look. The comment about the Reform council was pretty poor and says a lot about you.

Here is a couple

• And I’ve got better things to look at than your receding hairline.”
• for a short man you have a lot of gall to talk to me.
• your mum must be really disappointed in you.