Help me with some good replies for rude men

[petitpasta]

Twice recently I've had negative comments from men when in gym gear.

For context I have lost nearly 9 stone and have joined two gyms and am enjoying weights, yoga, pilates and circuit classes. I'm still overweight and am still losing weight slowly. I'm a size 16 (down from a size 28 two years ago)

The first comment was in a shop when I called in to pick up a parcel on my way to a class. A man said "think you need to spend a bit more time in the gym love" and laughed at me. I couldn't come up with a clever comment but told him to fuck off.

The latest one was outside my house when I was heading out for a weights class and the guy laughed and said "don't think the gym is working for you sweetheart". The only thing I could come up with was to say "I'm getting more exercise than your brain is".

I'm not really bothered by the comments - they say a lot more about the men making them than they do me - but I would like a few more putdowns for these stupid men because I think they should be shamed for their comments and I think they're banking on me / women being too embarrassed to reply.

So, any good comebacks please?

I can lose weight but you'll still be a wanker

A big smile: ‘Oh sorry had my earphones in didn’t hear you! What did you say again?’ Keep the big smile on cos no one wants repeat a cunt-sentence to someone who’s friendly and approachable.

My favourite was seeing a friend just squint to look closer as if only just noticing him, then recoiling and saying "UuURRRGHhh!" in an exaggeratedly disgusted tone, as if she'd just noticed a dog shit on her shoe and not even a human man 😂 in response to some prick running his mouth.

It's hard to convey in text, but it was very dehumanising for him lol.

"You need to spend less time worrying about my problems when....(thoughtful pause)...you know" and gesture at them randomly.

Something random like
“I’m so happy for you “ and smile then they’ll realise the comment has bounced off you and there’s no real come back to that

Reform council eh? Fascism in action. Not joking. Gammon men feeling full freedom to express their sexist, and racist, and violent opinions with no deterrents. You need to think about community and collective responses as it's the only thing that will cow them.

Congratulations. You're amazing already both with your fitness regime and handling those stupid clowns.

Fuck of is fine , but I would have to had the c word at the end.

Your father should have had a wank instead of having you.

@petitpastaalso, amazing congratulations with your fitness regime and weight loss. You’ve done amazingly well and your determination, self worth and general achievement makes you worth a hundred of this fucking village idiot.

Yes this.

I wouldn’t do a direct insult/fuck off (even though they absolutely deserve it) because a man who is willing to say such a rude comment could escalate, as shit as it is that we should have to pacify these fuckers.

huge well done on the weight loss

I had a comment from a neighbour who had witnessed me on multiple occasions leaving my house for a run - I always walk 5 mins to warm up. Whatever he said I told him to mind his own business - anyone else I don't hear them as I have headphones on. The neighbour lives in my head as the geriatric Nigel Mansell as he wears an orange boiler suit to jet wash his car - on repeat.

Oh that last one is good.
Fuck off cunt would also suffice.

Why trade insults? I’d stop them and earnestly and lengthily explain that I’d already lost nine stone, and was on a journey of self-discovery to my ultimate target of being healthy and happy. I’d embarrass the shit out of them by making them listen.

'Did you mean to be a cunt?'

Or if you have time, laugh hysterically, slapping your thighs and then just stop, look him right in the eye and roll your eyes or make a disgusted steering face and then go on your merry way. He'll wonder what the fuck just happened 🤣

I have used both, many times and they work.

I think swearing at them or trading insults is counter productive and drags you down to their level:

Would some of you really use these insults?
I think it's risky, if they're openly insulting you, they're weirdos capable of anything.
Maybe just think it in your head and ignore.

I look at them like I didn't quite hear, and then say 'sorry I don't have any spare change'.

Tell them they have the confidence of a much taller man.

Look them up and down and say how pleased they must be to have met their full potential so quickly...

You need this book; How to Piss Off Men: 109 Things to Say to Shatter the Male Ego

‘Small dick energy’

I'd be majorly embarrassed to hear any of these so-called comebacks come out of my mouth!
Why give dickhead men any oxygen? Just ignore them or go with a generic fuck off.

OP, you have done so well, I am hoping you don't have to handle such comments again. I also think you would be as well just to ignore the men if they say anything else.

Well done on your weightloss my go to some back is: 'Sorry, you've mistaken me for someone who values your opinion.'

How about 'I'll get slimmer but you can't do anything about your tiny d*k' whilst wiggling your little finger dismissively like a small limp d*k.

I saw a great one the other day that I’m desperate to use “ouch! You got me right where I don’t give a shit” or my old standby to bitchy women. Look confused or even laugh, both work “oh, you think your opinion is important to me. Bless”

People are right though if you can be nice and happy back they proper hate it because they can’t ramp up the ante without looking like a right angry twat.

We once had an absolute crazy man try to get into a road rage situation with us because we couldn’t get out his way fast enough for him. I wasn’t driving so as he got redder and more expressive I blew him kisses and happily waved. He had absolutely no idea how to respond to that. It was beautiful and the memory has kept me warm for years.

Oh and very well done on your weight loss. You are amazing.

A lot of small dick energy there, mate

Say "What? Have you looked in the mirror lately, mate?" and burst out laughing.

That will disconcert him, wondering what it is you're pointing out - he's bound to have some inner insecurity even if he isn't obviously fat, bald, short, etc.