My Dad has asked my opinion on a proposed change to his will.

[Shewas]

I have no idea what he's worth but he's always going on about inheritance tax, so I guess the estate is not insignificant.

He has two DDs and four DGCs (two each).

DSis is married to a man from a wealthy background, so DF is assuming she and especially her DC will do well from that side of the family.

My DH is deceased and we are not in touch with his family. I am full expecting DC will not inherit from them, and even if they did, I doubt there'd be much value.

I have always told DF to spend everything now and live as comfortably as possible, but that's not in his nature, so I'd expect what he has to be split equally between me and DSis, or as we don't need to money, perhaps equally between GC.

Dad is now talking about making things "fair" but not equal, by leaving a greater share to my DC, as the other GC will be so much better off anyway. I know no inheritance is guaranteed, but the other GPs have already set up trust funds for them.

So, I could see my DC advantaged, and I can kind of see the reasoning, but the whole thing makes me feel very uncomfortable. I'd hate there to be any kind of family rift, but also it doesn't feel right to advise against the interests of my DC.

FWIW I think Dsis would be hurt by Dad's actions but wouldn't take it out on me or DC, but people sometimes act out of character where wills are concerned.

WWYD?

He’s asking for their opinion!

Equally.

The relationship between you and your sister will be affected deeply. Your sister choices shouldn’t mean she is now penalised.

He doesn’t have a crystal ball, what is in place now may not been in the future.

Would you favour one daughter over another? Say your Dad leaves just you the money, and your children make different life choices one financially secure and one not - would you do the same thing he is saying ? & how would it make them feel.

Why don’t you speak to your dad about getting premium bonds in your childrens names? That way before the will is activated, he’s gifted them
whilst he’s alive. How old are your DC? Are they close to any big life targets? Degree? First home? He can directly gift them to them and leave a letter to explain that whilst he was alive…. He already gifted them because of their situation. Don’t listen to the users against this as mumsnet is the website we run to when things don’t go right…. So on probability, we are the ones in general that have suffered hurt of kind.

This.
He can help your kids out now, and without your DSis knowing, but as the majority of PPs have said, if he doesn't treat you equally under the will he will be leaving you with a problem.

And as has been made there are no tax implications if you want to pass your inheritance directly on to your children on his passing.

OP, I've recently received a small inheritance that wasn't split equally (we got the smaller portion). It didn't bother me as I was just grateful to receive something and knew that the person who passed away could have spent the money on themselves but they kindly left it to me.

There were 6 people involved and the majority of the amounts were different - no drama.