Things you're doing in your life right now that would sound bonkers if you told anyone, but make sense to you....

[HundredsOfTinyWillies]

I'm currently stalking a man in my neighbourhood because I love his dog. I've bumped into this man and his dog twice. I've started going out at the same-ish time and walking the same-ish route in the hopes of meeting him his dog

I have a whole imaginary world in my head where I'm a former supermodel now living a quiet life in the countryside. When I'm pottering around doing household chores, I pretend Louis Theroux is following me asking me probing questions about my tough childhood and stratospherically successful career.

I plan retirement every single day. I model different scenarios with different levels of income. I look at properties in retirement communities a lot. I'm 40.

I would never say these things out loud to another human because they make me sound absolutely bonkers. But there it is.
Tell me your weirdness that you could never verbalise...

You might like the teacher suspensions as well, a lot of the male ones are struck off for… exactly what you’d guess, but some others are a good read. A personal favourite was a teacher who was struck off for getting drunk on a ski trip and telling students exactly what he thought of them. A lot of them it’s to do with drink… I guess they’re just pushed to the edge.

@Barney16 I do this too!!!! Usually if I can't get to sleep. I find it very calming.
I also have an unwritten novel in my head that I'll never write as I'm absolutely rubbish at writing. I like embellishing the plot. and I really hope I'm never outed on Mumsnet as I sound nuts

Whenever I see that a dog is lost locally to me I imagine myself being the one who finds it and gets it back home. I always carry a spare collar and lead in my car but have never needed it.

I love this. I’m planning on try Tai Chi myself 👍

Haha I have this in the local feed store too.

Yes definitely adding these to my nighttime reading. thank you 🙌

Must find the ski trip one!

In my mind, I imagine I am starring in a musical throughout the day. So, when I have to hang up the laundry I imagine I am singing a song about it in front of an audience wearing all kinds of amazing costumes.

When I go running I imagine I am a hired ninja assassin and when I run towards other people in the park I imagine I am on a mission to eliminate them just like the terminator

I often imagine I am various animals depending on how I need to present myself that day. Eg if I am in charge of running a meeting then I am a lioness - powerful and self assured. If I need to confront someone I become a shark etc

Well there’s a couple things that I do right now. The first is house hunting for one. Yes, if ever I find myself alone in the future (married for years so …) I’ll need somewhere nice to call my own. I check out properties in areas I’d like to live in (more near the countryside) as OH would never move! I look at the photos to see what needs sorting, maybe a new bathroom and what I’m happy with. I secretly wonder what my life would be like no longer being married…just myself to sort out and dream I guess!
The second is I’m always watching the Crime channel and spend time looking into things and seeing what happens with cases. This involves my more research side 😃 Weird probably but I don’t care as I’m not hurting anybody and I’m happy doing this>

Humans are so weird and I love it!
I also have a lot of zombie apocalypse thoughts. I know I’d survive no problem

When I read an awesome book I imagine myself as the author. This even extends to, e.g., Shakespeare.

I was awarded a queen's medal for recognition of a support group I helped setup in the early 00's and invited to 'afternoon tea in the garden' along with many others.
Princess Anne was there and unbeknownst to me had a karate chop party trick where she would stop her hand, supposedly, millimetres away from your throat. She did it to me but missed and crushed my larynx. I tried to laugh it off as best as possible but went to the toilet and cried.

Is this a daydream or real?

Because if it’s real, I would have sued if I could.

I need to know now 😁

the highest earner I know is £4m a year.

True sadly and my voice has never been quite the same (it's 3 octaves higher). A long time ago but reading this thread made me think about it.

I go on flight radar and google all the places where a random plane is flying too ! I then go on trip advisor to plan my accommodation 🤦‍♀️

Personally I like receiving my best novelist award in person and talking about everything leading to this.

Some motorway services ask for your car keys before they give you the key to the shower. Can't remember if Tebay is one of them.

not paying my council tax and hoping for the best

This is insane but also absolutely adorable. I can just imagine the tiny predator with his little arms.

There's a market for apocalyptic novels. If you ever feel like taking it from mind to megabytes of text, do update.

I fantasy travel. I look up holidays and destinations and plan my time in various places. I also have the lottery fantasy. I usually start by winning a million and begin to divide it between family and friends. Usually I have to then re think and double my imaginary win as there are so many people that I want to share it with Im not left with much. I also fantasy house buy and plan how I would decorate and furnish my new very large property.

I look at properties in retirement communities a lot. I'm 40.

😂😂😂

Gosh I thought it was only me that did this! I have a plan for every conceivable bad thing that could happen 😬

Reading about how to audition for RADA and other drama schools, even though I'm in my 40s with health issues and social anxiety and haven't acted since I had minor parts in school plays.

But it is interesting.

I daydream that Nigel Slater moves next door and has a veg plot at the bottom of his garden next to mine. I cut the fence down lower so we can chat about what we are growing and how we are going to cook it.