I admit I had my babies a long time ago, so probably everything I think I know is wrong….

[CurlewKate]

…and I’m sure there have been many good changes in baby raising practices. But two things in particular seem to be causing anxiety and stress in the new and expecting mothers on here and in my RL that there seems to be no real evidence for, and seem to just be things to beat women up about. Colostrum harvesting and tummy time. Am I missing acres of scientific evidence? To nail my colours to the mast, I was a hippy dippy attachment parent who was old and confident enough to question anything I was told if it didn’t seem to make sense to me. But for many that’s a very very hard thing to do.

It is simply harm reduction, and this is always how it is presented by midwifes/in leaflets

Hah - if only that were true. The amount of sheer bollocks I’ve been told by medics/HCPs, particularly during pregnancy and early childhood would prove the contrary.

For things like alcohol, no one needs a drink. There's no proven safe limit, its obvious to just advise no alcohol

No one needs to drive. There is no guarantee of safety on the roads. Obviously we should advise no driving.

When you are advising ever more restrictions on women’s lives with no evidential basis you are causing harm. You are also causing anxiety and stress with every additional restriction you place.

The sheer number of “just in case” advices given to my children has grown exponentially since I had mine in the first half of the 90s and the bulk of it has no real evidential basis - especially when it comes to those advices which limit what pregnant women eat, drink or do day to day. Its amazing how much of this. advice also aligns with marketing opportunities compared to when mine were born.

I agree with the PP upthread - downgrade the internet, ask for the evidential basis for specific advice and instead focus more on friends who have raised babies for day to day advice.

We had our first outside the uk and I don’t remember much encouragement to harvest colostrum. Which was good as I wanted to enjoy my last weeks of pregnancy, and spend tine stressing about trying to milk myself would not have been conducive to that. Filed colostrum harvesting under “no thanks” (along with perineal massage).

Likewise the big emphasis on tummy time passed us by. Our daughter hated it so we didn’t push it (but we didn’t just lie her first all the time either - she was sometimes in sling, or being held up and snuggled etc!). I think we’d have felt more pressure to try in the UK.

Only for the first couple of months until their own immune system kicks in. Vaginal birth gives advantage too, but you don't get the same shit if you fail to deliver vaginally as you do for formula feeding.

The WHO gives advice based on global populations. If you read their nuanced reports, their advice for first world wealthy Western nations is very different to that for the third world. They also have to be culturally sensitive.

DD's, 29 and 23, both had sheets and blankets. Firmly tucked in like snug bugs. They were Italian fine linen and cotton, hand embroidered. Beautiful. The washing and ironing though! I've still got them.

Interesting point but for the record, I failed to feed ds beyond 8 weeks whereas I fed dd until 9 months. Guess what:

They both had bronchiolotis/asthma
They both had repeated ear infections/glue ear/grommets, starting at 7/8 months
The both had eczema
They were both crap sleepers/early speakers
DS took a first from Oxford/alpha/sporty
DD took a first from Cambridge/beta/musical

Just saying.