Things you 'should' feel guilty for but don't

[TinaTwinkleToes]

I don't like my mother but she helps with childcare

My company has an ‘unlimited annual leave’ model and I take 8 weeks of paid leave a year. If I answer a few emails on leave, I will charge half a day to the client every time that happens. So at the end of the year, I show up as having taken only 6-7 weeks of annual leave, which doesn’t stand out as much as 8 weeks would.

Zero guilt, especially as most people at my level do the same.

We use the tumble dryer for all our washing - can't stand to have clothes hanging off dryers / languishing on radiators and it's so much more convenient. And I think those heated dryers are such an eyesore.

I don’t think most of these are grounds for guilt at all! The recycling ones, maybe, but nobody’s perfect.

I went NC with my horrific abusive mother 20 years ago and after decades of emotional enmeshment and being her only crutch, I expected to feel crushing guilt and self-disgust. But something permanent had snapped inside me and I’ve never felt a scintilla of guilt. Just relief, satisfaction and inner peace.

I have been NC with my older sister for 25 years and she has been trying to get back into my life since my dad moved in with us two years ago (Alzheimer’s). I won’t speak to her and I won’t have her in my home. She’s been homeless and in and out of prison for years and has significant MH problems. I probably do feel a bit guilty about her, but not enough to change my mind. I call her once a week, withholding my number, and hand the phone to Dad so she can speak to him. I did facilitate one visit where she stayed in a hotel and DH did the “handovers” so she could spend a couple of afternoons with Dad, but I won’t see her or invite her into our home, which she is quite upset about. She’s a screeching, bullying harridan with no empathy and between her and my mother my childhood was a fucking misery. I fought hard for my peace and I’m not risking it.

I do not feel guilty for
Arriving at work on time (none of this 15 mins beforehand crap)
Taking my full breaks
Leaving work on time
I do not do charity direct debits
Nor do I do needy friends or money loans (learnt the hard way).
I pretend I don't hear relatives hints (be direct)

I lived on benefits whilst a full time single SAHM. Actually I’m not sure I ‘should’ feel guilty for this, but I’m aware others might judge me for it

Saying no to people if I don’t want to do something or go somewhere
Ditto organising things and putting effort in when I’m not getting the same level of effort back
Having lots of breaks and holidays
Not cooking for my kids (to be fair, they’re adults, perfectly capable of cooking for themselves and I still buy all the food)

I just put them in the dishwasher.

For waving cheerily at the member of my team currently drowning. I know im his manager and I've tried and tried with him but he still saw fit to throw the team under the bus to save his own skin. He's an arrogant arse and thinks I owe him a living. I do not. The faster he's engulfed by HRs tidal wave, the better. I shall not feel a single shred of guilt.

please tell me more on this wonderful service. you pay for it in advance ? how does it work

Life is too short to wash out peanut butter jars - no guilt needed!

I have similar with my parents who still grumble on 2 years later.

it costs £60 a year to have my grass bin emptied and my dad is aghast that I pay it, lots of “why on earth would you pay” “it’s just ridiculous that I pay it” because I should do like they do.

My RETIRED parents bag it up and take it to the tip, they can’t believe I won’t do this.

Me and DH work full time and when we get home from work the tip is already shut meaning I would have to use one of my precious weekend days to get rid of the cut grass. Why would I do that when I can pay £60 and have it collected from my front door.

Does My Head In.

For those of you interested in my blow dry subscription, it's with a local independent blow dry place that is a 5-minute walk from my office. I can go as many times a week as I like, Sunday to Thursday. I pay monthly. I have only washed my own hair about three times in the last couple of years. I have no guilt at all.

You lucky thing

I should feel guilty for not giving my mum grandchildren. But I don't because I don't want the burden, expense or responsibility of being a mother. I'm also very selfish and love being child free.

I don’t know why anyone should feel guilty about after school club. My 3 Gdcs all love it! Dh once went a bit early to pick Gds up - he didn’t want to leave so dh had to go back later.

I cleaned one out today, I get through the jars quite quickly as I put peanut butter into smoothies.

They're a bloody pain to get clean. 😡

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER yes my son loves the place. He gets excited during the school holidays as he gets to be there all day and have even more fun!

I know he’s safe and happy there so no guilt but others will judge me not wanting to spend every minute with him

Not helping my colleagues when I have finished for the day. We do different jobs.
Management have recently promoted several staff to management roles and now we have a very distinct lack of lower grade staff. They are suffering under the workload. I won’t help out, they need to understand the error in not filling these roles.

Oh. I wish I could feel like this but I’m unfortunately the opposite- I feel guilty about almost everything, including things that are nothing to do with me. 🙄

I should feel guilty about taking the piss royally out of my mum behind her back - but its the only thing that keeps my sanity (shes batshit but still love her).

TBH I do feel a bit guilty but I still do it because otherwise Id go nuts. But I do like a big slagging off sesh and mickey take with my brothers. We all say were are going to hell.

I don't feel guilty that when the government put my retiring age up to 67 from 60, I thought sod that, and downsized my home and took my private pension, and still retired at 60. I also don't do any volunteering, or make a contribution to my community. I live a life of ease, pleasing myself.

I admit that I am poorer than I would've been if I was still working, but not being able to afford stuff I don't need, and having a large house that was too much work anyway, is a small price to pay for an extra 7 years of freedom.

DD getting extra time in exams.
Not because she doesn't need it... she has dyslexia, it makes a massive difference to her.

But because there's loads of others who need it more than her but they don't have anyone advocating for them. My DN was 18 when she got her dyslexia diagnosis and exam arrangements, for her fourth try at GCSE English.

Urghhh I feel guilty about bloody everything. I should start a thread called things I shouldn’t feel guilty about but I do.

Making exDH still do the bins when he drops off DS midweek after scouts .

We've been divorced ten years. 😂😭

Impressive!