Family member sells gifts on Vinted - what would you do?

[LeChiffre26]

My SIL sells gifts we have given her and her family on Vinted. We take time and thought with gifts. It's disheartening to see this. She does not need the money! What would you do? Let her know you have seen them? Just stop giving gifts? Just give her any old thing?

Let her know why you won’t be continuing to give gifts.

That’s annoying. I would probably stop wasting my time thinking of the perfect gift from now on and giving her a gift voucher or food basket for Christmas! Or as you say, stop giving gifts altogether.

Do you ask what she wants for Xmas/birthdays? I find it annoying when people buy me and my kids random things that we don’t need, however thoughtful the person giving them thinks they are. It’s just more stuff taking up space.

Give vouchers next time.

There clearly unwanted, so just give vouchers or something for somewhere she likes, she’ll probs feel bad telling you

Vouchers is a good idea

Stop giving her gifts. Or just give her generic ones. She obviously doesn't like or want what you consider thoughtful.
I would say nothing though just quietly change my approach to gifts.

Well I imagine she doesn’t want the gifts either, which would indicate that despite the time and thought they are not to her taste or not things that her family wants.

If you have a good relationship you could try raising it with her and ask her what you could get them next time that would be preferable. Or just give her generic gift vouchers next time.

Go read the thread on preferring generic rather than thoughtful gifts
Thoughtful often misses the mark.

Id suggest stopping exchanging gifts. Or suggest just buying the kids. And ask for what they want / need.

Either you are getting her things she does not want, or she needs the money. If you want to go on exchanging gifts, ask her what she would like. Or suggest that you don't give each other gifts any more.

We all stopped buying for adults years ago, unless we are with them on Christmas day, in which case it was just a jokey secret Santa. Took away so much stress.

I think it just underlines that what one person considers thoughtful, the other doesn't. I wouldn't say anything - people are entitled to what they want with their gifts after all. If you want to change your gift giving to vouchers or something then that's up to you.

The problem is just because you think they should like them doesn't mean they actually do and stuff you don't want is just clutter. If you want to continue buying gifts buy something consumable or vouchers. The ones you buy aren't ones they want.

It's annoying but once you've handed them over, it's not really anything to do with you anymore. Maybe you're missing the mark with the gifts?

I'd give vouchers, cash, edible things like a hamper, an experience such as a meal out/cinema tickets or nothing at all!

Ask her what she wants instead of buying her what you think she wants?

Sorry but I agree, your gifts aren't what your SIL seems to like. I personally are never really happy with gifts people choose without talking to me, it always is something I don't really need or use.

I would just tell her that you think stopping gifts for adults may be a good idea and you will check with her about any wishlist the children have for birthdays and Christmas.

I have a relative that gives me thoughtful gifts - they always have an animal on them that is my favourite animal. But I don't like or want them - they either go to charity shop or are brought out when they come round. Gift vouchers is a sensible idea but i think by the time you get to vouchers it seems pointless exchanging cash gifts - I'd maybe suggest that you talk to them about not exchanging gifts next year

It sounds like gift vouchers or stopping gifting would be a good idea. Or give her something personalised. 😉

Don't think this is something I could bring up. Some good ideas here tho to mull over.

If she doesn’t want them what do you think she should do with them?

What do you do with gifts you don’t want?

Edit - sorry I need not mean to quote you!

Give her a Dove gift set next year.

i assume you’re not asking her what she wants? If she’s getting stuff that that she doesn’t want or need then I’m not surprised that she sells them on. Would you be happier if she regifted them or took them to the charity shop?

You need to ask her what she wants, get her vouchers, or stop buying her presents full stop.

With the bigger gifts I do ask and these are Ok. It's just some of the more little stuff.

Give them something personalised… first and last name! 🤪

Sometime in September, have the ‘let’s not do gifts this year’ conversation. I’d feel a little disheartened as well and find it a bit rude.