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Partner not spending the same amount on me for my birthday …..

229 replies

ohitssnowww · 10/12/2025 09:04

I will start by saying I’m not materialistic and I know you don’t give to receive.
The start of the year we both said as it’s our 40th this year we would both like a little mini break.
It was my partners 40th in September and he wanted to go to Greece for a few nights.
So I booked for 4 nights end of September.
I paid for everything and probably spent around £1,500 as we did all inclusive.
For his birthday he said he wanted to feel special so I got him a cake ,balloon etc and got him some gifts to open (around £100 ish pound)

Now at the beginning of the year I said I would like a few nights away in December somewhere warm.
It got to October and he started saying Christmas is a bad time to go away,it’s expensive in December blah blah so I said okay we will just fly to Dublin and have a night there (nice meal etc )
Last month he started saying flights were so expensive and would I not rather have the money he was going to spend on flights for spending money somewhere else.
So I knew he didn’t want to go so I said okay.
He’s booked us to go to Manchester after Christmas for two nights.
At first he was saying he would book a really nice hotel etc and then said again “wouldn’t you rather have spending money for Trafford centre “ so he’s booked a premier inn.

He has double the amount of wages that I have but he wastes money on online gaming so he’s clearly thinking he doesn’t want to spend all his money on me and have nothing for gambling online.
He gets paid 20th this month so will have money.
Then he says it’s pointless buying a birthday cake as we are away after my birthday and a balloon is a waste of money.
Then he jokes “I might as well re use the 40th banners too “
I don’t think he’s joking either
Would you be disappointed ?

OP posts:
Nosdacariad · 26/12/2025 10:01

CuriousKangaroo · 10/12/2025 09:11

You have a much bigger problem than your birthday if you are with someone who repeatedly spends a significant proportion of their wages on gambling.

This.

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 26/12/2025 10:16

Nosdacariad · 26/12/2025 10:01

This.

Yes definitely.

@ohitssnowww How was Christmas day?

AliceR1 · 29/03/2026 10:55

He’s a total arse. Sorry but a man should always outdo you when it comes to special occasions. Save your money next time, or better still, a la poubelle…

Salyexley · 30/03/2026 15:04

Bf/gf/husband/wife NOT PARTNER

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