I'm having the holiday from hell...

[Appalonia]

I'm on a 2 week holiday in America. A male friend booked himself this holiday by himself and then said, if I could just pay my airfare, he'd love it if I came with him just aa friends, as it would be more fun. I thought about it and since I thought we got on pretty well, I'd go for it. However it's turning into an absolute nightmare!

One example he hired a Mustang car for a road trip and then had a meltdown that my big suitcase wouldn't fit in the boot
Without checking if it did, he then threatened to leave me on my own whilst he went on this road trip. , I was so upset I left the hotel room and desperately looked fir a room for myself, but it would have been over £1k. He also keeps throwing it back on my face how much he's paid for his accommodation, even tho, it would have cost the same if I wasn't there.

I feel very vulnerable and annoyed at myself for going on this holiday. He's acting like he's on the holiday by himself, with no consideration for me, like not caring if I need to eat or anything I would like to do. We're in Vegas and all he wants to do is gamble. There's so much more going on, he's like a child constantly having tantrums raising his voice at me telling me I'm ridiculous if I sit down because my back hurts or that I don't feel safe in the car as he's such a nervous driver etc. I'm spending all my time placating him and I'm so upset and fed up.

I don't really know what I want from this post and I feel like it's my own fault for putting myself in such a vulnerable situation but I feel really alone and I can't say anything to him as I know he'll just kick off again...

Just reminding everyone OP posted at 9pm and 9.30pm, and it’s now nearly 1am so she won’t be back for a few hours yet!

I'm baffled. Just do your own thing if you dont want to do what he is doing? Or ring your air line and see if you can bring your flight forward. Dont just wait miserably for the holiday to end.

Based on this and the previous thread I’d assumed very young, quite naive and/or not well travelled but a quick skim of OP’s other thread titles suggests not.

Go home op

I could be wrong, but I thought that on the ‘clothes for hiking in Death Valley’ thread, the OP described herself as close to retirement?

Just fly home.

Not in the Style & Beauty one unless I totally missed it.

You’re not wrong

close to retirement

Sorry, I just looked to see where I can have gathered that from, and I realised that I advance-searched the OP to see if she was the poster I remembered from the ‘hiking in Death Valley clothes’ thread, and her saying she was ‘pretty much retired’ just came up on the list of results, but on an entirely different thread. (Not actually stalking!)

Seems odd everyone is saying to go home. She's in the states, she can just continue her holiday without him?!

You seem to have different ideas of how to holiday, he's invited you along to his holiday but you seem to want a shared holiday where you plan things together. I think he wants to do his thing so you can also go do your thing.

Unless he's expecting you to get up at 4am for golf too them I don't really understand the problem. He sounds like a bit of a dick but you sound clingy, if you want a fancy meal then go for one.

I think the Ryder Cup issue is that they’re sharing a hotel room, and he wants to turn on the TV at 4 am.

Ooofe, bunch of us rented a holiday cottage in Devon. I thought these people were decent human beings until it came down to getting the 'best' bedroom, the best food the best drink etc.

It was supposed to be a fun week next to the sea with a bunch of mates but they turned into selfish dictator wankers from the minute we stepped over the threshold of the place. By the time we got in the car to go home, nobody was speaking to each other.

Home and I walked away from the lot of them. Awful. I became much more careful who I went on to class as a friend now.

Nothing like a holiday to realise you can’t stand a person.

Sorry but I am finding this thread mildly annoying. There's nothing to stop you just going and doing your own thing, unless you can't afford to, in which case you really shouldn't have gone on holiday with someone you expect to pay for everything. What do you want out of this thread? It's obvious you're just going to follow this guy around and feel sorry for yourself. You could go and have some fun on your own or just go home but clearly you're not going to do either of those things.

Never fly transatlantic with someone you can't say 'ok Chris, I fancy steak tonight so I'll catch you later on' to.

It is admittedly different but I sometimes tag along with Mr Monkey when he runs a marathon abroad. The first couple of days he (and sometimes other running buddies who have gone out too) are rightly focussed on the race. I tend to arrange my own thing for the first couple of days rather than trailing around after them moaning that it's all marathon expos and pasta dinners.

This! He's a gambler, let him get on with it and do your own thing.

Here are the options.

1. Book the next flight home, whack it on the credit card, and put it down to an expensive lesson learned.
2. Book a variety of things to do by yourself and try to make the most of it. Suck up the cost, never again etc etc.
3. Head down and wait it out. In a few days it will all be over. You just have to get through each day. I did this on holiday recently with a 'friend' I had not travelled with before. Three days in I was ready to book a flight home, but once I got past the halfway mark I realised I could bear it because the clock was always moving in my favour.

Now you know to never travel with someone else unless you have the financial means to get out of it if it's not working out.

Maybe not on car insurance many places in US a nightmare without a car

The only way out of this is to spend money. Whether that's on an early flight (preferable) or your own hotel rooms. If you don't want/can't to do that, you're going to have to just suck it up I'm afraid.

Don't you have any money with you, surely you took spending money? Why can't you buy your own dinner somewhere else if you don't like the place he suggested? I would say it's only two weeks and it's pretty much a free trip. Are you joined at the hip, if he wants to gamble can you go and do something else?

I'm actually intending to watch the Ryder cup in the UK, but it does start at a more civilised hour.

How old are you both if you don’t mind me asking?x

Depends if he wakes her at 4am.

It sounds like most of the two weeks is done at this point, so you might as well ride it out OP. If it was me I’d have him drop me somewhere for the day and just meet up for dinners. Sounds like you could both use some space.

I’m kind of with this. Presumably OP is a fully functioning adult who can entertain herself. Why pay all that money to fly out there to just come home again? Stop complaining and make the most of an opportunity some people will never get. And yes, if you don’t at least have back up money for food and drinks then you really shouldn’t be going on holiday.

Yes, it annoys me too.
It also annoys me that they were in Vegas and now they are suddenly in California.

I can't understand people sitting around passively putting up with this shit. I'd have looked for a hotel room elsewhere and if I couldn't find a reasonably priced one I'd have been straight on the airline to see if I could change my return flight to an earlier flight or if that wasn't possible I'd have found the cheapest flight I could (returns often cheaper than singles).

But no, better to hang round complaining about the situation and feeling really uncomfortable rather than actively doing something.....