Ruined ds's prom

[lostanduseless]

Went to pick up him and friends and there was a hideous diversion. I just couldn't do it. Drove round and round for an hour until his headteacher gave up and drove them home. Could hear friends getting frustrated, understandably, while on the phone to him.

I feel to stupid and useless. I drive loads but every other parent managed to work it out except me. Poor ds. Poor teachers. Poor other parents. What a twat.

I don’t understand how picking him up late “ruined his prom”. Presumably prom had finished so how did you ruin it retrospectively?

None of the other parents will have given it a second thought once their kids were home. Do you catastrophise everything like this?

Op why on earth are you worrying so much. You certainly don’t need to buy presents. A diversion is not your fault. And your son had a great time. Try not to overthink things. You did your best, these things happen! No one died 😀

If this is the worst thing your son or any of his friends have had to deal with in their lives then they are 🤬 lucky. How could you ruin a prom that was already over? And how are you going to deal with your anxiety regarding him facing similar minor issues when he is at uni or living away from home?

If it makes you feel any better, one time we got stuck trying to get out of Bath for so long that I honestly started believing we entered some sort of time loop because it was just ridiculous and we couldn’t figure out what we were doing wrong.

Gosh you’re awfully hard on yourself op! You tried to do the right thing and it didn’t work out.

Dd and I went to an activity (that was crap anyway) in the next county. There had been floods so some roads were closed. We just drove round and round trying to get out but kept being directed back to the closed road. It was horribly frustrating. Ended up driving to a city I knew in the wrong direction or I’d still be driving round and round there.

Don't worry on DS1s prom he vomited on the headteacher as he had managed to drink vodka all night. We missed the call to get him and his best friend brought him.home early. I'm sure that head is more annoyed than yours 😜

They went to prom.
They got home safely.
Nothing is ruined at all. I can completely see how a diversion could get you so lost (dual carriageway etc.) Some chocolates and a card would be lovely. But don’t worry about this. Please.

I’m a teacher. Parents pick their kids up late from events all the time, it’s just one of the many hidden extras that are part of the job. Headteacher might be feeling a bit more tired this morning, but I’m sure they’ll get over it quickly enough.

A nicely written ‘thank you for taking son home’ email would be enough, but I’m sure some chocolate would definitely be welcome.

Did they not have an after party? If so then hardly an issue to get to that late. If not they were coming home. They’ll survive!

and the point of your comment is..?

At my DD’s prom, a parent punched the headteacher in the face and if was filmed and on social media in about ten seconds. The police had to come.

So at least you didn’t do that!

You didn’t ruin the prom! Agree with pp that you will laugh about this in later years. A gift for the teacher who brought them home is a great idea.
don’t be so hard on yourself.

Kindly OP, are you getting help for your anxiety and catastrophising? Because your reaction to this and how hard you are on yourself is not normal.

I say this as someone who used to be this way myself until I got help.

The prom had already taken place, so it wasn’t ruined. Diversions happen, they can be confusing. You have done nothing wrong.

I can confirm after getting stuck in a city once due to a diversion, that Google maps is no help. Both the signs and Google maps just kept sending us round in a circle. I had to pull over and ring my husband for help - he knows the city much better than I do. I felt like a helpless little lady, it was really frustrating.
Anyway, it doesn't sound like prom was ruined? Yes get the HT some chocolates. Don't worry about the other parents, I wouldn't expect anything in that situation.

Oh god it is dds prom tonight. And there is an after party. At our house! Probably worse things will happen than this op!

OP- just look at the words you are using- you feel sick, you think you are useless etc etc. You got lost on the way somewhere - that doesnt mean you are a failure at life! You are catastrophising and using one tiny incident to reflect badly on the entirety of your character - I think thats worth examining/self reflecting.

As for this: Don't you use google maps?- what a stupid comment. Google maps has taken me in the wrong direction before and it has our office location down in the wrong place despite contacting them multiple times asking to correct it. Google maps isn't God FFS.

Why ignore? This is exactly what google maps is for. A satnav won't help in a diversion, google maps will. If she and you want to avoid this situation arising again you need to learn how to use google maps!

You didn’t ruin his prom because it had already happened. It’s ridiculous you’d even think that. And they got home safe so it’s not even a big deal. But other parents probably managed it because they were using google maps or waze on their phone not an old style sat nav so to avoid anything like that again I’d get a holder thingy for your phone and chuck the sat nav in the bin.

Because google maps will help to get out of a hole like this? OP said she used her satnav which is obviously useless with a diversion. Anyone who still relies on a satnav should be aware how to use google maps in case of this kind of situation.

But you can use google maps to choose your own route - the way we used to use paper maps in the old days. You can set your own route by using the 'stops' function to ensure you avoid a diversion. Relying on a satnav is outdated.

Get some therapy because this is a silly thing to feel sick and useless over. Do you catastrophise everything?

The teachers will be ok with it. You were trying. It’s parents that don’t try that annoy them.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Nothing was ruined. There was a minor mishap that’s it

Op I am looking at this the other way that it's an excellent learning experience for them and will help to make them that little more resilient

‘Ruined’ is an extreme word we use to beat ourselves up op! That definitely was not in the ‘ruined’ category! And I’d say most of us have a story where we couldn’t make a journey that others could have (I’ve two!)

Thank the head teacher, perhaps buy a local map and study it, instead of beating yourself up.

Be glad it was an unfortunate situation for something of little or no importance, it was not say getting to a job interview or home from a wedding.