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Original poster

DS not home and uncontacable

325 replies

lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:30

I am starting to really panic. He is 18 and went to the pub at around 10 - I dropped him off to one further away than he usually goes to to meet friends. He doesn't drink or drive. When he goes into town he's out until around 4 and I (sort of) go to sleep, but at the pub he would be back by now but he's not.

There's a fault with his phone which means it doesn't connect or send calls and we haven't got round to fixing it, which is stupid. It goes straight to voicemail and I assume messages aren't getting through, even though they seem to. Whatsapp is one tick but the whatsapp call rings but he's not answering.

Where the fuck is he? It's not like him to be unreliable but I just can't work out where he'd be at this time.

OP posts:
PlantDoctor · 30/05/2025 01:34

Chatted someone up and went back to theirs?

Edit: sorry that was a bit blunt! I just meant, it's not hugely late yet and teens don't think about their mum up fretting sometimes.

Original poster
lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:37

I'm just so cross and so worried.

OP posts:
GiantSaucepan · 30/05/2025 01:39

Try not to panic, he may have gone on into tow, or the pub might be open late? Or he can’t get a cab but his phone is out of order and he didn’t think to / couldn’t contact you. Do you have any of his friends numbers?

WakingUpTheNeighbours · 30/05/2025 01:40

Do you have any of his friends numbers that you could send a text to?

The chances are that he is absolutely fine so try not to worry, easier said than done I know, and obviously get him to sort his phone issue out asap.

Original poster
lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:41

I really don't think he would go into town without telling me. I think he would walk from the pub and it's probably around a 45 minute walk. It's shut now and I think would have shut at 12 so where is he?? Why is Whatsapp ringing and he's not answering?

OP posts:
WakingUpTheNeighbours · 30/05/2025 01:49

He is probably chatting with friends.

People will say it’s OTT, but if I was worried, I’d get in my car and go and look for him. You might come across him walking home. If you’re not going to be able to sleep until you know he is home safely then you may as well. I hope he is ok. 💐

sleepandcoffee · 30/05/2025 01:50

Can you message him through Facebook or instagram ?

Original poster
lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:52

Ds2 has tried Snapchat and nothing. I have one friend's number but I don't know the lad and don't even know if that's who he was with.

OP posts:
insomniac1 · 30/05/2025 01:53

WhatsApp will ring even if his phone is off or there’s no reception. Doesn’t mean he can see it ringing if that makes sense.

Tryingmum456 · 30/05/2025 02:00

I wouldn’t panic just yet. Any chance he did a detour and decided to go into town?

Gymsharkathlete · 30/05/2025 02:02

lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:30

I am starting to really panic. He is 18 and went to the pub at around 10 - I dropped him off to one further away than he usually goes to to meet friends. He doesn't drink or drive. When he goes into town he's out until around 4 and I (sort of) go to sleep, but at the pub he would be back by now but he's not.

There's a fault with his phone which means it doesn't connect or send calls and we haven't got round to fixing it, which is stupid. It goes straight to voicemail and I assume messages aren't getting through, even though they seem to. Whatsapp is one tick but the whatsapp call rings but he's not answering.

Where the fuck is he? It's not like him to be unreliable but I just can't work out where he'd be at this time.

Wattsapp calls still look like they ring even if the person doesn’t have signal (he won’t be getting the calls if it’s one tick)

KateWithTheGoodHair · 30/05/2025 02:09

Can DS2 see his location on Snapchat maybe? I’m sure he’s absolutely fine though

Original poster
lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 02:19

Just been for a drive and everywhere is deserted but I messaged the number I had and the lad wasn't with him but very kindly tracked him down and tells me he's being dropped off and will be home soon. So relieved but very bloody cross as well.

OP posts:
DurinsBane · 30/05/2025 03:39

lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 02:19

Just been for a drive and everywhere is deserted but I messaged the number I had and the lad wasn't with him but very kindly tracked him down and tells me he's being dropped off and will be home soon. So relieved but very bloody cross as well.

Glad he is ok

BusterGonad · 30/05/2025 03:48

With all respect, he's 18, it's a bit embarrassing for his mum to be texting his mates when he's not straight home from the pub after closing time. You need to try and chill out a bit. He's an adult now. You need to let him live his life a bit.

Renabrook · 30/05/2025 03:49

BusterGonad · 30/05/2025 03:48

With all respect, he's 18, it's a bit embarrassing for his mum to be texting his mates when he's not straight home from the pub after closing time. You need to try and chill out a bit. He's an adult now. You need to let him live his life a bit.

exactly this

Golidlocksandthethreeswears · 30/05/2025 03:52

Sounds like his phone is on do not disturb or airplane mode

LBFseBrom · 30/05/2025 04:24

lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 01:37

I'm just so cross and so worried.

It was not actually that late when you first posted, lurchers, and your son is eighteen.

abracadabra1980 · 30/05/2025 04:28

BusterGonad · 30/05/2025 03:48

With all respect, he's 18, it's a bit embarrassing for his mum to be texting his mates when he's not straight home from the pub after closing time. You need to try and chill out a bit. He's an adult now. You need to let him live his life a bit.

100% agree with this. I used to stay out all night at friends and boyfriends at this age. No phones back then.

AnnaL94 · 30/05/2025 04:38

lurchersforever · 30/05/2025 02:19

Just been for a drive and everywhere is deserted but I messaged the number I had and the lad wasn't with him but very kindly tracked him down and tells me he's being dropped off and will be home soon. So relieved but very bloody cross as well.

I’m sorry but why are you cross with an adult?

Fair enough if he was 16/17 but 18…. He’s legally old enough to be in pubs.

Most young people end up going into town/the clubs/back to a friends house for “afters” when out drinking.

As long as he has a key to the house and doesn’t make noise when coming in he should be able to have a night out without his mother driving round looking for him at 2am. So bizarre.

Berlinwanderer · 30/05/2025 04:55

FWIW @lurchersforever it might not be cool but I’d probably feel anxious as well. 18 isn’t that old (I’ve got an 17, almost 18 year old) and I’m not sure I’d feel entirely relaxed if it was early hours and no sign of him.

copi1ot · 30/05/2025 04:57

The lad you contacted is a good egg. I would not have been happy being disturbed at that time, but he went above and beyond.

Berlinwanderer · 30/05/2025 04:57

@AnnaL94 not really bizarre is it ? As a nurse I’ve witnessed quite a few incidents where really bad things have happened to young adults who get caught up in all kinds of things. Inadvertently. So wind yer neck in .

Rafting2022 · 30/05/2025 05:24

Yes it may be worrying but that doesn’t mean we have to start driving round the streets and texting his mates in the middle of the night.

Tripadvisor101 · 30/05/2025 05:28

At 18 I was at uni and my parents wouldn't have even known I was out let alone when I was back.