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Funniest reason you got "the ick"...

716 replies

singlewhitetrashheap · 07/04/2025 17:41

A fair few years ago, I was with a really hot bloke from the Netherlands. Tall, dark haired and really good looking. He was also nicely endowed in more intimate areas.

We'd had sex a couple of times and were just learning what we both liked etc. Third occasion is in full swing, and he's on top. He pauses for a minute, and let's out a really loud fart which ordinarily wouldn't be an issue because they're funny. It was really nasty and we had to stop so I could open a window. Fortunately we weren't being loud.

We're getting back into things and I can tell he's getting close but he starts moaning really loudly because he's ALSO farting really loudly and is trying to hide it by moaning like a porn star, and then there's the fact that he can't hide the smell, and it hits me again and the over performative moaning/the actual farting, and the fact that the entire street must have heard him, meant I just couldn't do anything but laugh and gag.

Neither one of us finished and he was mortified. I couldn't stop giggling. It made him sulk. I couldn't help it.

Unfortunately, any sexual attraction I had, completely evaporated. Fortunately, his flight home was the next morning and I didn't have to spend days with him. We never met up again.

OP posts:
Dogstar78 · 08/04/2025 07:13

My partner calls all countries islands.

Here is an example. We should go back to 'insert country name that's not an island' it was a beautiful island. He gets super annoyed when I correct him.

He has a 'big job' at a huge international company. I honestly worry he'll say this sort of thing at a social event amongst his (international) colleagues. I dunno if this is a 'pacific' (another ick of mine) ick, given I am an ex geography teacher?

In addition, he can't read a map either, another ick, but that is probably a 'me problem'.

LillyPJ · 08/04/2025 07:18

NeilDiamondsBlowDry · 07/04/2025 21:44

I can trump that I think ……re-using a strand of dental floss that he kept in his pocket and actually showed me proudly

Oh my god! That's just awful!

Worriedsickmostofthetime · 08/04/2025 07:25

I wasn’t going to type this because it’s just 🤢 but here goes… how about a little bit of reciprocal going down and his 🍑 is not clean… think berries hanging in a bush. 🤢🤢🤢

Theunamedcat · 08/04/2025 07:25

Couple of things we went on a coffee date he let me know his wife died last year (it was March I thought that might be a bit early but then again that might just be me) then he found out my age (50s) and was all no way I thought you were WAY YOUNGER than that (he was retired early but still 60s) instant ick!

Rolopolo2 · 08/04/2025 07:26

He cuddled my legs

JustMarriedAndLovingIt · 08/04/2025 07:26

He walked too ‘casually’. When people have asked me to replicate The Walk, I’ve not been able to but it was 🤮 🤮

Gettingbysomehow · 08/04/2025 07:26

A friends boyfriend who called everything a guy. They'd be at a garden centre and he'd pick up a plant and say let's get this guy. Everything was a guy.
I found it absolutely repellent.

Bloodyhotbifolds · 08/04/2025 07:37

Pencil dick. Literally the girth of a pencil. Put me off skinny men for life!
Also….long fingernails. He was utterly drop dead gorgeous, so I tried to over look it, but he used them in places he shouldn’t and was a really crap shag so I ditched him. He was furious because apparently “No one dumps me. Ever”. Poor chap 🤣🤣🤣

Pudmyboy · 08/04/2025 07:40

Arlanymor · 07/04/2025 19:32

He did an impression of Gollum. I quite like the characterisation of Gollum, it's fascinating in terms of what he represents around possession and obsession. Being a lone type of being. Elements of Caliban, right? He's well-written and observed. And didn't Andy Serkis do an amazing job?

But do I love Gollum impressions at the point of climax. Not so much.

I want to see a photo of the cat portrait...

Did he call out 'Preciouuuuusssss!' at orgasm?
I took want to see the portrait of the cat!

Yayforyou · 08/04/2025 07:42

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This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Left · 08/04/2025 07:43

Saving the squeezed residue from a spot because it was an interesting shape 🤢

MyDeftDuck · 08/04/2025 07:48

The one that really stands out for me with the 'super ick' was a guy I met one night. He was with his mate and I was with mine, they offered to buy our drinks - naturally we accepted. They were both nice looking too.
The brought the drinks over from the bar and both had pints of lager - one of the guys opened his mouth really wide, put the drink up to his face and kind of inhaled the contents in one gulp. Then he licked around his lips and beyond with his humongous tongue - it was the most revolting thing to witness and a real turn off. We couldn't get away fast enough and fortunately the venue was really busy so we could get lost in the crowd.

Missedthis · 08/04/2025 07:49

Over used my name, and sort of repeated
bits of sentences.

“it’s good, isn’t it MissedThis, isn’t it good?”
”Shall we get another drink, MissedThis, shall we?”
”Are you ok, MissedThis, are you?”

Nope.

LillyPJ · 08/04/2025 07:50

One man offered to take me on his motorbike to the cinema (second date) and lent me a helmet. The helmet was disgustingly dirty and really smelly inside. He was also a very nervous rider - really slow and wobbly in traffic.

Init4thecatz · 08/04/2025 07:52

This reply has been deleted

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Yep, that's definitely a relationship killer!

Onthelinetoday · 08/04/2025 07:52

My first boyfriend (lovely, lovely, lovely guy) still wonder about him now. Had absolutely massive eyebrows, proper caterpillars, looked quite silly. Anyway we broke up because we were both quite nervous of progressing the relationship.

I bumped into him a few months later and he’d plucked the eyebrows- that was the ick moment. He was so handsome he needed a bit of a flaw, and I’d always loved the fact he didn’t care and was so confident. The guy with the perfect eyebrows- ick!!

Onthelinetoday · 08/04/2025 07:54

Missedthis · 08/04/2025 07:49

Over used my name, and sort of repeated
bits of sentences.

“it’s good, isn’t it MissedThis, isn’t it good?”
”Shall we get another drink, MissedThis, shall we?”
”Are you ok, MissedThis, are you?”

Nope.

It’s a taught sales technique to build rapport and control the conversation. Someone doing it socially would really get my back up.

Missedthis · 08/04/2025 07:56

Onthelinetoday · 08/04/2025 07:54

It’s a taught sales technique to build rapport and control the conversation. Someone doing it socially would really get my back up.

He did it once post sex.

”Did you enjoy it, MissedThis, did you?”

No, mate, not really.

Snoken · 08/04/2025 07:57

A guy I had just started dating came to join me in Barcelona when I was there for a couple of months and the first day we were going out for late breakfast and he put on one of those nylon (?) backpacks that straps around the waist and he had packed a water bottle, a jumper and an extra pair of socks. He also wore new running shoes with socks. All we were doing was going for breakfast down the road, we weren't hiking. He then continued to wear that get up for the whole weekend he was there. Even when we went out to dinner in the evenings. He just screamed I'm a tourist, please rob me. I was glad to see him go back to the UK and didn't see him again. Since then I have a very strong aversion to men with those types of backpacks, unless they are hiking.

BeanQuisine · 08/04/2025 07:59

I'd been seeing a young man who was good-enough-looking and mostly good company, although I'd already realised he was a bit of a worrier and probably a hypochondriac.

Didn't seem that serious an obstacle though. But then waiting for him to turn up for an important date, he called to say he can't come because he's feeling ill and it might be serious, because his "bogies taste funny" and he's thinking of calling an ambulance...

For me that was a suitable cue to forget about that one.

Bundleflower · 08/04/2025 08:04

I found out he had a low birth weight

Ohwtfnow · 08/04/2025 08:04

She ate her dinner off a tray on her lap on the sofa. I have no issues with eating on the sofa, but the tray gave me the mega ick. It had a really grubby cushion thing attached so it was especially for sofa eating, I presume. Somehow if it had been a normal tray I could have pretended that this was a one off and that the tray was usually for drinks/crockery carrying purposes and it would have just about scraped past the ick test.

Smallmercies · 08/04/2025 08:07

BlondeMummyto1 · 07/04/2025 19:11

He wore fake trainers.

Were they made of cardboard?

Ohwtfnow · 08/04/2025 08:07

Also, the guy who had obviously cleaned his ears before I came over (all good) but left the disgustingly earwaxy cotton buds very visibly in the lid-less bathroom bin. I have never seen such an enormous amount of earwax. Ick ick ick.

Smallmercies · 08/04/2025 08:07

Bundleflower · 08/04/2025 08:04

I found out he had a low birth weight

Niche, but I can respect that