Mothers of adult daughters...

[Eegokeennow]

Quick question:

Under what circumstances would you give your daughter the silent treatment/ignore text messages etc?

Oh and no doubt use her for childcare despite having a horrible childhood with her yourself

None. Silent treatment is abusive. Is someone doing this to their daughter?

Never
If DD pisses me off I will talk to her and we will sort it out and vice versa

Never. I will always be my children’s safe place.

Zero, there's nothing that would make me ignore my dc.

My mother, however, used to do it over absolutely everything, usually me disagreeing with her on some level. Best thing I ever did was cut her out.

Um yes I have a toxic relationship with her but none of the rest of your post applies.

So you have a toxic relationship with her

so begs the question… why do you have any relationship with her?

It's happening to me. I'm the daughter.

Nothing my dds could do that would make me ignore their messages or give them the silent treatment. It's horrible to experience my mother was the queen of silent treatment and I never knew what I'd done. I promised myself to never do this to my children and I haven't.

Yes op

you have a toxic relationship with this women

presumably years of shite from her

So why subject yourself to any more?

Never

A reverse, thought so

I would never do that, and if I did I would expect my daughter to cut her losses

Absolutely never. Mind you, I can't imagine my DDs ever doing anything that would upset me (or, if they did, they would make sure I never found out about it). And I most certainly wouldn't pick their lives apart to find something to be offended about - they are all independent women who are quite capable of managing their own lives without my interference!

I didn't mean it to be a reverse. I was genuinely asking how bad things would have yo be for a mother to give her adult daughter the silent treatment.

NONE of these commenters have delt with an abusive young adult child 🤦‍♀️

Have none of you considered that the child could be narcissistic or abusive.

Well Op isn't coming across that way but who knows really?

None.

Really sad for you both 😞

Ok well I can quite safely say that I am not abusive and go out of my way to be a thoughtful, helpful person. I have lots of friends both from my childhood and also from various stages of my life who love me, and my husband always says that I am a kind and caring person. I am sure that I'm not abusive but I would understand if someone had to cut their abusive adult child out, to protect themselves.

If the daughter had been abusive verbally or physically, stolen from me or massively betrayed me.

What are you on about? 😂

it’s not a reverse

no where did the op say she was the mother

None of those would mean I’d ignore them. None of them.

clearly - they need help

Yes, so it would have to be a serious thing, not just a minor slip of the tongue or some kind of human error. I'm always watching what I say and sometimes despite my best efforts, something slips through that leads to silent treatment.

So why on earth are you having any kind of relationship with this toxic woman?