They dont know it`s a turn on

[husbandhotstuff]

A bit bored today.
So my user name says it all.
What dose your partner or husband do that you find really sexy but its just normal.
But they dont know its a turn on.

Mine is when he dose his belt up or un-dose it or just leaves it undone while he gets ready for the day i dont know why but yeah its a thing.

Jesus, I couldn’t handle someone taking my phone put of my hand and answering for me. Are you sure your failure to assert yourself around cold callers or your children isn’t the result rather than the cause of your DH habitually speaking for you?

Playing guitar and the mesmerising movements of his fingers. And the movements of his forearm muscles as he plays.

His blue eyes that change colour - sometimes darker, sometimes lighter.

When he brain storms for work and scribbles all over massive posters. His brain works very differently from mine and I find his brilliant mind, passion and mental creativity for work really attractive

Learned helplessness, weaponised incompetence, and deeming a job beneath him will all make a woman's fanny slam shut like a vault door in Gringott's Bank. It stands to reason that competence and willingness to attempt the unpleasant jobs will have the opposite effect.

This this this this.

Foreplay is all the things he did and didn't do for you, and likewise you for him, since you last had sex.

He doesn't habitually speak for me I just thought of a few examples from the last week where he went out of his way for me when he really didn't have to. He knows I'm capable of speaking for myself but in the spirit of the thread I personally find it attractive when he goes out of his way to make sure I'm not being bothered and actually seeks to reduce my mental load.

DIY type jobs with his manly arms. Sometimes I advise just so I can watch!

He owns his own company and so is very much The Boss whilst at work, which is very attractive.

He used to play rugby and still has massive shoulders and muscley forearms, so I love it when he rolls up his shirt sleeves, especially when he's wearing his beautiful watch.

When he lies in bed with one arm tucked behind his head, his reading glasses on the end of his nose and absorbed in a book on chess theory (he's obsessed with chess). There's nothing sexier than being seriously clever.

I love my dh's side profile! I often sneak a look at him especially when he does a sort of half smile to himself and think ooohhhh! He's incredibly clever too, which is enormously attractive.

I also love how he's endlessly calm, kind and patient with my dds, including a stroppy teenage one. 🥰 And his utter adoration for DDog. It's mutual - when he's around, she won't look at the rest of us.

Unfortunately he's an awkward driver and has zero practical talent, so I don't have those these days! Totally agree that those multi pocket trousers/just being Capable and Manly sometimes can be extremely attractive...

Maybe half the attraction is they don’t know we are finding them sexy and they’re not showing off?
Saw a silly twerp today in a teeny weeny T-shirt (to show off the huge arms🙄) and too-tight grey tracky bottoms, glancing round to see who’s noticed him… I wanted to shout “that’s not how you do it, son” but DP was cleaning his HGV so I was busy watching him…
And what is it about forearms on our lovely men… it’s cropped up so many times on this thread?
OP was right - “they” don’t know!!

Oh God, all sorts.

Rolled up sleeves - yes.
When he plays his violin - extra points for rolled up sleeves.
He has the most beautiful long, slender hands. Pale and lovely. I love watching him cook, write, brush the DC's hair, stroke the pets. Anything. He has a habit of spinning a pen when he's thinking.
As a PP mentioned with their DH - DH's side profile is lovely. He's got high cheekbones, a good jaw, and quite the aquiline nose. I love watching him when he's reading.
The most beautiful dark eyes, they're really big and when he looks at me, he looks at me.
He's from Norway and I love hearing him speak Norwegian.

They're the physical things.

Then there's the things he does.

Brings me coffee in bed every morning.
Watching him play with the DC is just lovely. He fully goes into their world.
He's the best cook, and is always coming home with new ingredients for lovely meals.
Neither of us can dance well, but he always dances with me in the kitchen.
He loves gardening and he's really good at it, same when it comes to building things.
Can always have an interesting discussion about almost anything, which is essential to me because intelligence = sexy in my book.
Is endlessly curious.
Generous, kind, and makes me laugh until my whole body hurts.

There's more but I'm in danger of writing a whole romance novel here and nauseating the whole of MN. 🤣

This. Being a try-hard is a total turn-off.

It's just easier. I don't want a crick in my neck.

In the interests of full disclosure I think you would all find my forearms underwhelming.

I thought it was fragrances. But there's a lack of reference to them here - maybe because they're a known turn-on?

It really doesn’t. Why would not being completely useless be a turn on? That would be an extremely low bar.
Anyway, the OP gave an example of the type of thing she means. It’s depressing to then read page after page of cleaning up cat vomit and replacing the cap on the toothpaste or whatever. I just find it so weird that that is nearly always how threads like this go.

I repeat: Foreplay is all the things he did and didn't do for you, and likewise you for him, since you last had sex.

To you. I disagree 🤷‍♀️
To me, while it makes sense that you’re not going to be attracted to someone who doesn’t treat you well generally, that does not mean everything positive (or just not negative) that they do counts as foreplay.

It's because someone who treats you badly is a turn-off that them treating you well is de facto part of foreplay. The observation that "foreplay started straight after you last had sex" is used to explain to men why their wives don't want sex with someone who spends all his time playing video games, doesn't wash up, and gripes when asked to mow the lawn.

I think I have a crush on @GiddyRobin ’s husband 🤣

Hahaha can we start a fan club?! 🤣 I'll bring tea and biscuits!

Though, fair warning, his favourite dish is Smalahove (don't Google if you like sheep...)...that was a surprise when I first visited the in-laws... 🙃

@GiddyRobin Eek! You can have him on high days, holidays and any other days that might involve The Sheep Thing.

@Fairyvocals <bangs gavel> Excellent! I'll make sure he brings Kvæfjordkake (definitely not sheepified!) and his gardening trowels! 😁

I have a wife. Things that make me melt:

• carrying something very heavy that I wouldn't be able to manage
• getting ready for work in winter - seeing her in big socks, underwear and a plain white vest. It's like the lesbian equivalent of sexy lace lingerie!
• using a drill
• wearing her glasses to do a crossword
• sitting in bed wearing only her glasses

So many things..,

When he smokes
When he changes gear
When he says 'jesus babe' after sex
When he speaks
When he is in his work gear

What does she do for a living?