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Original poster

What's the most ridiculous way you have injured yourself?

238 replies

Unpaidviewer · 27/01/2025 20:19

I'm incredibly clumsy and I think I might have broken my toe (the one next to the big toe). I pushed with my feet to scoot back on the sofa and the foot slipped forward but the toe somehow curled under my foot and got trapped. There was a nice crack noise and then the pain hit. The pain is unbearable when I stand or walk so I've come to bed early with pain killers, a book and a cup of tea.

So could anyone share a ridiculous injury to make myself feel less stupid?

OP posts:
podthedog · 27/01/2025 20:23

I've broken my toe by stubbing three times. First time, I went to A&E and they laughed at me.

I've also been hit by my own surfboard which required surgery and a leg brace for six weeks. First rule of surfing is....never let your surfboard go when standing in shallows as a big wave might come up behind you and...

Oh, I also squeezed a bottle and it pinged off and hit my eyeball. I scratched the cornea and it really hurt, but healed. Never squeeze a bottle close to your face.

WombatCowgirl · 27/01/2025 20:24

On my graduation day, eating a magnum, I realised the flat spoon-shaped stick fitted exactly in my upper palate, and stuck out like the beak of a spoonbill. After a few jolly minutes pretending to be a spoonbill I realised it was terribly stuck. It seemed hilarious even while the splinters of wood were painfully being snapped out!

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 27/01/2025 20:26

Yawning. Pulled a muscle in my neck and walked around with my head tilted for a week!

Anonym00se · 27/01/2025 20:29

I once put my back out putting the kettle on.

I also knocked myself to the floor resulting in two black eyes after very publicly walking into the plate glass door… at Vision Express.

outside1inside · 27/01/2025 20:29

Plug to my straighteners got stuck around the leg of the bed. Instead of getting up and untangling it I yanked it really hard and one of the pins flew straight into my eye. It happened so fast I didn't blink and saw the plug stab me in the eye. A bright red eye and bruising for weeks!

OldTinHat · 27/01/2025 20:30

I mean, how long have you got?!

My most memorable was making toast, turned to put it on the breakfast bar. Dog was there without me realising, tripped over him, went smack, face down on the edge of the breakfast bar and came round in a puddle of blood on the floor, the dog was licking his chops after eating the toast.

Black eyes, broken nose, concussion...!

Hope you're not too sore for long.

Upstartled · 27/01/2025 20:30

Putting my hand in my dh's wash bag and cutting the tip of my finger off with his razor.

user1471453601 · 27/01/2025 20:30

I broke my big toe when I dropped an empty little and a half bottle of gin on it.

Thank goodness it was empty, wouldn't have been a happy bunny if the bottle had broken when full 😁

Beebsta · 27/01/2025 20:31

I was standing on the top of two steps from our deck cleaning the cobwebs with a broom. Fell and twisted my ankle. I lay there shouting for help like I was about to die.

just yesterday I was removing a nail from around the corner on a deck with a hammer. Fell off the deck, through the hedge and my youngest son kind of caught me despite me yelling at him to move because I didn’t want to hurt him. I was still holding the hammer. Fortunately did not hurt him or myself.

my DH twisted his ankle doing somersaults on a trampoline with the kids.

minsmum · 27/01/2025 20:31

Put my back out turning to answer the phone,broke my ankle putting the recycling in the bin

2025willbemytime · 27/01/2025 20:32

Fell off the treadmill as I thought it had stopped. Kicked my now ex h on his knee by accident when I was leaving the room = three broken bones.

Slipped on a book on the stairs as didn't want to wake little ds by putting the light one. Hurt my back badly. Day after my lash physio from when I fell down the sleep last time.

Shadow1986 · 27/01/2025 20:33

Electrocuted myself taking out a smashed lightbulb from a lamp without turning it off…

AmusedMaker · 27/01/2025 20:34

Pulled the light switch in the bathroom a bit too hard, it flew out of my hand and swung back and hit me right in the eye.

BeADinosaur · 27/01/2025 20:34

Gave myself a black eye by taking my jumper off.

My hand slipped as I was pulling it off and I punched myself in the eye!

Lefthanddownnumberone · 27/01/2025 20:35

Too many.

The best one was using a meat cleaver to cut through a dozen red roses stems that I had been given - and doing my finger instead. I then drove myself and finger to A and E- wtf! it was reattached.

During a lecture I was giving on observation skills I bent down and hit the desk and didn’t get up again - woke up in hospital with stitches in my head.

Mulledjuice · 27/01/2025 20:35

I have found my people

gamerchick · 27/01/2025 20:35

Picked a book up wrong. Hurt like a bastard for nearly a week.

Mum2jenny · 27/01/2025 20:36

Doing DIY and DP asked me to get an item placed carefully in a room which we had used to decant a lot of furniture into. I had to get there via a dressing table, chest of drawers and a bed. Returning with said item, I jumped off the dressing table, fell and landed on my arse. But arse connected to a nail in a bit of wood on the floor. It fucking hurt, not too much blood though. Then he didn’t want the said item after all this!!

Hoppinggreen · 27/01/2025 20:37

Not incredibly bizarre but amusing because it involved both of us.
DH was in the shed and something fell on him cutting his head
I was hanging the washing on a rotary dryer and stepped back when i heard him shout and fell down a slight slope in the garden.
I was ok but DH was bleeding so I drove him to A&E. We waited ages and DH had stopped bleeding so we decided to go home, by which time my ankle really hurt and I couldn't really walk. Knowing how long the wait was at A&E though we decided to just go home anyway.
I limped to the car while DH supported me with a big dressing on his head

Ihateboris · 27/01/2025 20:38

Dancing in a new pair of shoes which were rubbing and caused a blister. I popped said blister with an ear ring, then put sweaty socks on and went for a run. The blister got bigger and BIGGER, and became infected. I ended up in A and E! Anyone care to see a picture?? It's not pretty...

whaddayawannado · 27/01/2025 20:38

I once cut my forehead open on the sharp corner of a packet containing a tablecloth in Dunelm.

podthedog · 27/01/2025 20:38

When I was younger we had French doors. My mum left the house for a run and when she came back she ran straight into the glass. She thought it was still open. I just heard donk.

AlteredStater · 27/01/2025 20:39

When much, much younger, fell off a pedestal when dancing at a nightclub. It was only a small pedestal and I am not the most balanced of people, so was a stupid idea! One foot missed and I plummeted off. Probably was lucky I only broke my arm! Friends joked about it for ages afterwards!

Glenthebattleostrich · 27/01/2025 20:40

Tore my calf muscle unloading the dishwasher, literally stretched to put a plate away and heard a pop. 8 weeks on crutches, lots of physio and bruised from thigh to foot.

Popped my achiles tendon dodging a cat on a run (bruising, physio etc). Was actually discharged from physio the week before I did my calf for this injury.

Broke my finger falling upstairs.

Concussed after a child fell on my head on a bus.

Menopause is not being kind to me.

Swearwolf · 27/01/2025 20:40

I pushed down on the top of the recycling in the bin to make something fit in, a tin can lid sliced right into my hand! I saw it go in, thought oh fuck, and had to go to A&E for stitches. Still have a massive scar on that hand!

Hope your toe feels better soon.