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Original poster

Can I ask my kids to pay towards Xmas food shop.

388 replies

I4gotmyname · 08/12/2024 19:47

Would it be bad if I asked my 3 oldest, to give me 15.00 each towards the Xmas food shop. And ask them to pay for the alcohol. As I don't drink.

I'm struggling a bit this year . Not to a massive extent. But a bit of help would be nice. I feel bad though because they are my kids.

OP posts:
TeenToTwenties · 08/12/2024 19:48

How old are they?
Are they earning?

No33 · 08/12/2024 19:48

I guess it depends, if they are 25, that's fine. If they are 5 I think it's a bit unreasonable 😂

Assuming they are adults, I think it's fine.

SelfCareBear · 08/12/2024 19:48

Just don't buy any alcohol then, if you don't drink. That'll cut the costs. If they want any, they can buy it themselves.

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Sometimeswinning · 08/12/2024 19:49

Not a problem. Our family Christmas we give money, buy things, all prep together. Some pay more, some pay less, someone has to host. But we all club together!

Comedycook · 08/12/2024 19:50

Say you're not buying alcohol this year so they can bring their own if they want it.

And ask everyone to bring a different dish ..one brings pudding, one brings snacks etc

Sometimeswinning · 08/12/2024 19:50

No33 · 08/12/2024 19:48

I guess it depends, if they are 25, that's fine. If they are 5 I think it's a bit unreasonable 😂

Assuming they are adults, I think it's fine.

I didn’t think about this. Sodding, little freeloaders!!

2025willbemytime · 08/12/2024 19:50

If you can speak then of course you can ask. Whether it is fair is another question. I have two of mine coming, one working and one at uni. I would never ask for a contribution.

Anotherworrier · 08/12/2024 19:51

Its a bit late in the day if you’ve already offered to host but I suppose not really a big deal, provided they are older and independent.

Pinkissmart · 08/12/2024 19:52

Well, what are their circumstances? Are they earning? In education? Do they live with you or on their own?

CakeIsNotAvailable · 08/12/2024 19:52

I'd do as a previous poster suggests - don't buy any alcohol, and tell your children that they will have to buy any alcohol they want.

Original poster
I4gotmyname · 08/12/2024 19:53

Sometimeswinning · 08/12/2024 19:50

I didn’t think about this. Sodding, little freeloaders!!

Show quote history

🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
LindorDoubleChoc · 08/12/2024 19:53

Why don't you make it a bit more straightforward and say their ages and their financial situation relative to yours?

But for starters - if you don't drink, don't buy any alcohol. That's really really simple.

Floralnomad · 08/12/2024 19:54

How old , do they live with you , do they already contribute , do they have partners ? Without all this information who knows how or if you are being unreasonable . The pp suggestion of telling them if they want alcohol they need to buy it seems reasonable .

fanaticalfairy · 08/12/2024 19:55

Assuming they're all working, I'm surprised they haven't offered

LittleRedRidingHoody · 08/12/2024 19:56

No33 · 08/12/2024 19:48

I guess it depends, if they are 25, that's fine. If they are 5 I think it's a bit unreasonable 😂

Assuming they are adults, I think it's fine.

Dammit!

DS is 5 and with the number of 'can we buy this for Christmas?'es I've had this week alone I was considering docking his pocket money 😂

TheGreatWoofington · 08/12/2024 19:59

Of course , ask! I’m sure they’d be glad to help.

Original poster
I4gotmyname · 08/12/2024 19:59

Floralnomad · 08/12/2024 19:54

How old , do they live with you , do they already contribute , do they have partners ? Without all this information who knows how or if you are being unreasonable . The pp suggestion of telling them if they want alcohol they need to buy it seems reasonable .

Sorry i didn't think. Adult ds lives on his own and he works on good wage. Ds 17 gets quite alot of money via pip and uc. Dd has 2 children . One with special needs .

OP posts:
ssd · 08/12/2024 20:02

Are they earning

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 08/12/2024 20:04

I think asking them to bring something would be easier than asking for money.

Arthurnewyorkcity · 08/12/2024 20:05

I think as they're adults be honest.
Say can't wait to have you all for Christmas but there are lots of mouths to feed and I'm struggling so can you either bring a dish or contribute...
We all bring a dish when the mother in law hosts a big get together.. it's fine, Christmas is about being together not a free meal. Defo ask :)

steponacrackbreakyourmothersback · 08/12/2024 20:06

Bring their own alcohol and ask for a contribution- snacks, starter , dessert etc

Original poster
I4gotmyname · 08/12/2024 20:07

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 08/12/2024 20:04

I think asking them to bring something would be easier than asking for money.

No it wouldn't it would complicated it.

OP posts:
Scottishskifun · 08/12/2024 20:08

Why not do it tapered so adult DS £20, DD £15 and youngest DS £10? Would definitely say about the alcohol though to all three!

For what it's worth I now buy majority of the Christmas food at my mums house we are a family of 4 and she puts us up the least I can do is pay for the food and I cook it anyway so its easier for me to know what we need!

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 08/12/2024 20:08

I4gotmyname · 08/12/2024 20:07

No it wouldn't it would complicated it.

Show quote history

OK just a thought.

Notimeforaname · 08/12/2024 20:10

Yes tell them you can't afford to feed them all with your own money and they need to pay too.