What's the most ridiculous thing you've even been accused of?

[NavyPombear]

Just that really, Something so obviously nonsense that you couldn't believe anyone would take it seriously.

For me without doubt, it was when my parents thought I'd robbed a bank.
I was 17 and at school at the time of the robbery......

To this day I'm not entirely convinced they believe I wasn't involved 🙄

Accused of making a complaint about a colleague who subsequently was suspended and sacked. All this happened while I was on a holiday abroad and had no idea any of this was going on and found out all about it when I returned. I was accused of being a horrible person for making this complaint and it was my fault that they were sacked! I guess there's no arguing with the stupid!

I was accused of stealing a Take That watch off a girl in my class, when I was in year 5 at school. We both got the same watch for Xmas, she lost hers so accused me of taking it. My mum wouldn’t let me wear it to school after that. I still feel pissed off about it all now.

Years ago when I was about 17, a boy of the same age came up to me on a Saturday afternoon in the shopping precinct of my town, and made a lengthy and detailed accusation involving my coming between him and his girlfriend and telling his girlfriend lies to split them up. He knew my name but I had absolutely no idea who he or his girlfriend was - as far as I knew I had never set eyes on him in my life!

I would have suggested it was a case of mistaken identity, but he knew my full, not very common, name. It was in pre-internet days.

I told him I didn't know him or what he was talking about and he went away. I had no way of following it up so never found out what was behind it.

At the time, I was a geeky, unattractive teen who had never had a boyfriend and didn't have a social life beyond going to my best friend's house to mutually swot for our A-levels, so trying to split some couple up was simply not the kind of thing that it would ever have occurred to me to do.

I sometimes fantasise that there is an afterlife where you get the opportunity to get the answer to any mysteries in your life, and that one is on my list of things to ask about.

I'm so sorry @InformerYaNoSayDaddyMeSnowMeIGoBlameALickyBoom, people can be so disgusting in their desire to be seen as "in the know".

Cheating in a maths test when I was about 6 years old...... I went on to study maths at Cambridge.

I'm am suspecting you may be my SIL from that description of your mother??
We have delt with exactly the same behaviour.
Are you off to panda to her demands this weekend by any chance?

Oh Informer, firstly I'm so sorry your little boy joined the angels so soon. They are keeping him safe and warm for you ❤

As for the gossip, what can I say. What a vile rumour. In what world does something like that even gain traction? I have a theory that modern day gossips would have been jeering in the crowd at a public hanging back in the day.

When I was in hospital a few years back, the lady in the next bed told a staff nurse Id had sex with a male night nurse in the toilet!

@Arthurrat hell no, I haven't spoken to her for nearly 20 years. Sorry to hear there's another one!

When I was a teenager my stepmother made up a story that her brother had seen me in a nightclub smoking and buying drugs. I neither smoked nor did drugs at all. And even if it was true her brother wouldn't have recognised me, it was completely implausible. She was a known liar so that wasn't so bad but then my mother who actually hates her guts said she believes her.
And used that against me when we got into fights about HER spending all the bill money on smoking and buying drugs. And they are both so shocked that I'm no contact with them both these days.

I was accused while working in a bank, of switching off numerous customers' large overdrafts, therefore causing huge problems for the individuals affected. I wasn't trained on overdrafts and had no idea how I would even do this. Months later I did receive a written apology as they discovered it was a technical hitch after all.

I'm still on a high and celebrating with a vanilla slice because I have just been proven not guilty, nay, completely innocent of a heinous crime. A saga that has gone on, in various ways for nearly a decade.

I live in a second floor flat on the opposite side of the building to a chemist's shop on the ground floor. Every autumn and spring I get accused of causing a water leak in the fake suspended ceiling of said apothecary.

What is above the suspended ceiling? A reversible air conditioning/heating system. Each time they turn it from suck to blow, as it were, with the changing of the seasons, it blows a gasket and one of the polystyrene tiles becomes much sogginess and they feign igorance and want me to pay for it/claim on the insurance because they say that the leak comes from my flat two storeys and 200 metres in the opposite direction away.

In the meantime, they go in the water cupboard and switch my water off. I've been sort of passive aggressive about this and just ignored them until they gave up, all the time playing the water on/water off game with the Allan key and sneaking around in the night. The process lasts about two weeks every November and April. It almost became a tradition.

I might add that I live in Corsica. Don't ask why it has gone on so long but yesterday, with the help of Angry Plumber, better management at the copropriété and Chain Smoking Tony at AXA.

Knopka Pixie is a free woman.

I was on the phone to everybody! ''They've admitted it was their sodding air conditioning!"

I might organise one of those photoshoots where freed victims* *of wrongful convictions do press conferences raising clasped hands in the air with their barrister and the loyal campaigners.

Obviously, in my case, it would be Lionel the plumber and Jérôme at the copropriété. Tony at AXA insurance can't join hands with anybody for long. It interferes with his Marlboro habit.

My sister is convinced that she saw me kiss a man at my hen party almost 20 years ago. She told my (now) husband the following day.

It didn’t happen. My friends who were there that night have told her it didn’t happen. My husband completely believes me. It just did not happen.

My sister is still convinced and still brings it up.

Accused of the theft of £2,800 from a service user and sacked from my job of 22 years in 2012. Myself and one other staff member were two of the highest paid staff members left funnily enough and there had been discussions about it in head office! (They sacked my colleague shortly after, on other ridiculous charges!)
I was arrested at work. The police, after I had been interviewed, said that it was very apparent that it could have been anybody who committed the act. And that I would have come last on the list of their suspects. I battled and battled, giving them everything they asked for, even showing that the rotas had been doctored, it was faint, but it was there. I was still sacked because they couldn't prove I hadn't done it and neither could I, despite the fact that during that particular period, I had inherited 17k from my grandmothers estate.
The safe keys were left all over the place and at every single staff meeting I brought it up.
My union rep pushed me to appeal, but the stress of the suspension and the constant fight to prove my innocence had completely drained me and I had no fight left. I virtually had a breakdown.
Looking back, to the public they put on a good front as a charitable caring organisation, in reality, they are actually appalling. Over the years, the things they did and the things I'd witnessed were at times questionable. (Not reportable stuff, I'd have been all over that, no fear).
I was due to be presented with my long service award at a special dinner the month I was arrested. That still all sticks in my throat.

😂

Drug addict, loads of people for some reason thought I was a drug addict because some twat spread it around. I was 100% not a drug addict. Irritating more than anything else.

Sexism - astonishingly, I had a (now expired) disciplinary on my HR record for making a sexist comment. I dm fender, I'm a civil engineer, it was the 1990s, it was very mild, not really that sexist and nothing like the continuous stream of micro )and macro) aggressions I got all day as the only girl on a construction site. Even me boss apologised for having to do it, but continue had complained which triggered the procedure.

Coercion - I grew up in a large city and a large family. Over the years, we all moved away. After lockdown, DM moved to very close to me. I had nothing to do with her decision to move, and the announcement was as much as a surprise to me as the rest of the family (dm did actually have very good reasons for this location, rather than just "near Ibiza"). Two of my most p'ed off siblings Zoomed me together, accused me of coercing DM to move and suggested that I did so in order to influence her to change her will in my favour. I'm not sure that they believe me yet that they are wrong.

2 things
1 my parents accused me of being on drugs. They found pro plus in my school bag. I was taking pro plus because I was tired all the time and my parents wouldn't let me sleep at 8pm as it was weird, I was 17. Now we know I've got a heart and blood pressure issue and need lots of sleep.

1. Of being a lesbien at school, no issue with lesbiens but I'm straight. I just hadn't got a boyfriend yet (I was 15) and quite shy.

Thank you all ❤️

My son had been in hospital for 6 weeks when he was born, and I had a hell of a time during birth, when my 2 weeks were up on the ward I slept in the waiting room for over a week until they found me a room because I wasn't leaving him in a hospital alone 80 miles from home, and then I immediatly called the ambulance when he looked as though he was getting unwell again, was in hospital with him for over a week, and then made the harrowing decision to donate his organs, all by myself, at 18, then registered his death all alone as well, just to be confronted with such a terrible story about being a drunk teenager who murdered her baby.

I very often regret not saying stuff but I was so angry in that moment as soon as they said my street name and the day my darling boy was taken to hospital I absolutely let them have it, made one of them read out the cause of death from the certificate as well. It was 26 years ago now and I can still clearly picture the shame and embarrassment on both their faces.

They are 100% the type who would be sitting knitting at the front row of a hanging just for a day out.

I really hope I made them think on about doing that to someone else.

I never got much right in my life but I was a great mum, despite my age, and I loved my boy with everything I had, they had no right to take the shittiest time of my life and make up stories about it to entertain each other. Part of the reason I never gossip about anyone.

In my first job, a colleagues boyfriend worked in a electrics shop. She mentioned that he could get ex-display TVs etc for good prices. I had just moved so asked for one.

It duly was sorted, I paid her, and after work we moved it from my car boot to hers.

Unbeknownst to us, our boss had seen this and immediately leapt to the conclusion we were dealing with stolen goods on the work premises!? We were hauled in to separate rooms to next day and interviewed.

Our version of events matched up (obviously as it was truthful) and my friends boyfriend duly produced the receipt of the valid purchase from his workplace.

The Director was mortified and offered sincere apologies. It had been presented to them as fact by our Manager and in the end they had to apologise for leaping to such conclusions!

We were both good employees and it really was hard to report in to someone that did that after. I remember feeling so unsettled and confused that someone would accuse us of that without so much as a conversation.

In my 20s, I worked in an office with a big group of us 20 somethings and quite a few of us struck up romances.

Anyway, at the summer party, I was there with my boyfriend at the time. Another girl, a bit older than me, also there with her boyfriend, suddenly went nuts at me and accused me of throwing a drink over her as she had been chatting to my boyfriend.

I'm still mystified about it to this day. No one stuck up for me (inc my boyfriend!) She was a bit of a mean girl but we'd always got on ok before that. The most I ever got out of anyone was that I'd maybe drunkenly spilled my drink on her a bit but no one was sure.

She and her boyfriend refused to speak to me ever again. So odd.

Stealing a swimming noodle 🤷‍♀️

By chance, the accusers child goes to the same school as mine. At a recent school event, she also made a beeline for me when I unknowing dared to put our stuff down on the floor near her belongings. I think she thought I was up to my usual tricks again.

I have never stolen a thing in my life.

When I was doing my PGCE I ended up on a placement with this batshit TA who constantly lived life like she was in an episode of Eastenders. One day she saw me borrow someone's pen and put it straight back when we were in the department office as I needed to scribble something down and had left my bag elsewhere, then she spread about that I was a thief and once even made a comment to the other PGCE student "I'm leaving my phone here while I invigilate. I know you won't steal it because you're honest" then gave me a pointed look and walked out.

While I was on maternity leave one of the volunteers suggested she took the cafe takings bag home with her overnight because nobody was on site to take the money to the safe. It was not something any of the vols had ever done before, I was always really scrupulous about cash handling, yet somehow it was my fault despite not being on site for five months at that point...

I was repeatedly accused of having an affair with a married man - we had been very good friends for years. In fairness he had been seeing someone and has now been with her officially for a couple of years.. but the fact that I was suspected upset me massively, as I was in a very happy relationship of my own (and this guy, although I love him as a friend, it's exactly god's gift in the looks department haha). Not only that, but myself and my partner were supposedly good friends with him and his wife, too! She was a good friend of mine, and our friendship ended because of these accusations.