Have you explicitly told your child it’s ok if they are gay/have a partner of the same sex?

[Lollaup]

As a gay woman, who had a great upbringing and a lovely family I still really struggled with knowing if my parents would be ok with me being gay. I so wish they had said explicitly things like you can have a girlfriend for girlfriend, we won’t mind or somehow conveyed that message to me.
my best friend is also a lesbian and she said exactly the same.
so please don’t assume that your kids will just ‘know’ it is ok because you love them and have a close relationship

Yes. In that we’ve cheerfully said (DSs being 12 and 8) ‘when you’re older and have a girl or boyfriend’. It was deliberate at first but now it’s just what we say…deliberate because I knew a number of gay men who really struggled to come out.

Yes I did, around early teens the first time. I think it’s very important.

We have always said it doesn't matter if dd's partner is male or female, as long as they treat her with respect and love.

Yes. From about age 12/13

Yes absolutely will make it explicit and openly say it. Would hate for them to ever be worried to tell us anything.

DDs are only primary school age but we've always done similar to a PP and said "if one day you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend" on the odd occasion the conversation comes up.

Yes.

"When you're older and you have a boyfriend or girlfriend..."
and variations of including marriage to a man or woman(if she wants to get married).

I will when they are older

Yes.

I did with DS1(17) and I'm doing it with DS2(6).

Yup: pre-teens onwards. However, when the first came out as not hetro, they pointed out that whilst we’d said it, most of our mates were in straight couples, which didn’t actually normalise it Ito what they saw. Which was certainly true of their friends parents - although less so of our child-free mates who we tended to see without them. Made me realise the impact of that too.

Yes from being tiny. He’s 5 now. Always “if you have a girlfriend or a boyfriend”.

Also talked about the pride flags on display near our house during pride month. Cue 30 days of “Mum, why is everyone still getting married to each other?”

Same as above, we say girlfriend or boyfriend. With the younger DC we're currently having to remind them the only people they can't marry is their family - which hopefully implies they can marry anyone else they may like!

Yes. She's 11, I've made it very clear it's of no consequence to me, provided she's happy.

Yes and made it very explicit. As long as there is love, happiness and fulfilment we don’t care.

Yes l did.
I had gay friends growing up.
My youngest daughter is gay.
All my Grandkids know we are open minded and will love them unconditionally.

Yes have purposefully done this since they were very small and we have a lot of gay and lesbian friends so it’s really been very normal for them to know and love same sec couples.

But I’m aware it’s not universal and how hard it must be for kids who even though they feel close to their parents might doubt whether their being gay will be a disappointment or problem. Can’t imagine how hard that must feel for a kid. So sad.

Yes. We have lots of gay family members and friends and they've known about and accepted from a young age that you can love whoever you like.

Yes, openly so for as long as they remember. Especially as they know my views on trans, I know ,incorrectly, GCs get lumped in with far right homophobes,oh the irony. So I want to make it clear to them - you do what you like as long as it doesn't harm others.

Yes always made it clear they could have a boyfriend or a girlfriend and same when talking about if they decide to get married when they are older. I hope it’s easier for kids now compared to when I was younger.

Yes. From very little

Yes, absolutely. I’m an academic and have seen so many undergraduates having a tough time coming out to parents. Have always said ‘boyfriend or girlfriend’ to DS from when he was a tot, and more explicitly that it’s fine with me whether he’s gay or straight since he’s been slightly older.

I'm think when we talked to our kids about them having partners one day, we always said 'Boyfriend or girlfriend' so they knew it was OK, plus they both grew up with kids with same-sex parents in their classes at school. It is a wonderful non issue for most of their generation, I find.

Oldest is gay, I don't think youngest is, but I was really pleased when he was able to say to me 'I don't think I'm gay in real life [his words] but I have a bit of a crush on Link from Legend of Zelda, is that normal?' and I told him yes, totally - that sometimes when trying to understand these feelings we might attach them to a familiar figure like a friend, or pop star or game character and sometimes that person will be the same gender, it's just a safe way to explore those feelings and both gay and heterosexual people experience that.

Yes, from primary, "when you grow up and have a boyfriend or girlfriend "

Yes, my sister has 3 boys and we as a family have said to each if them when the time was right that girl or boy relationships will always be accepted.