Is it rude to ask where someone is from?

[RudenessCheck]

We had a plumber out to us yesterday. He was very nice and chatty. He spoke English as a second language. I was dying to ask him which country he originated from. I didn't as I wasn't sure if this question is rude or overly inquisitive, so I didn't.
Can you ask this question or is it rude?

If you talk to someone enough it will be mentioned

I wouldn't ask what difference does it make?

Honestly if they have an accent it's usually fine. I get asked all the time - and you can absolutely tell from their tone if they're being curious or unpleasant. Having said that I am white as are most of the people asking me which I think makes a huge difference.

It makes no difference at all obviously. I am just interested in people generally and always love hearing about their lives!

Some people do think it’s rude, it doesn’t bother me. I speak with an accent that is well spoken Southern English but I’m clearly mixed race. So I get the where are you really from question, less these days as people worry like yourself that it may be construed as racism or xenophobia. I couldn’t be prouder than to say how my Dads family were refugees and the perils they endured to escape and yes I can cook my Dads home countries food as he taught me as a teenager and yes I will make it for you if you express a love for it and we have become friends.

I just love hearing people's back stories like this! I would have a field day if I were to meet you in real life.

It depends on a lot of things. It could come off as judgemental or discriminatory in the worst case scenario.

I am white with a non-UK accent and get asked all the time where I'm from. Personally I find it draining having to explain my background repeatedly to strangers who I'm not invested in. So I make a point of not asking people this myself.

There are loads of other things to talk about 😊

Fair comment. In that case I am glad I didn't risk asking.

I think it's fine, if you're chatting generally, to say "Where is home?"
It can lead on to other comments/questions like " Do you get back much?" and can show a genuine interest in the other person.

I’m a Brit living in Spain and agree with this. It’s like a constant reminder of my otherness! It’s always well meaning but I’m shy and prefer to blend into the background so I don’t love it.

Don’t ask “where is home?”. Presumably he doesn’t commute in from a different country to work. He quite likely thinks of the UK as home. Ask him what country he’s from.

My Italian teacher said the same once when we were chatting before class - she gets really tired of people asking where she’s from when they realise she has an accent.

The problem is that what feels like a friendly interest to the speaker may follow a long series of racist remarks or a drip drip of micro aggressions which have left the person with an accent really fed up. Best not ask in my experience.

My (no longer with us) father nearly always asked this when being introduced to someone new. It was a hangover from the army and the war when new recruits arrived.

For me it's basically small talk like a weather.
My answer is usually flowed by "ooh I've been. It's lovely" or by "oooh i want to go". And that's it.
I don't mind people asking as long and it doesn't leadto massive deep talks😁

Or may even just follow a lot of other friendly expressions of interest which all build up a bit.

Agree with previous posts. I speak with an accent, so people often ask where I'm from. I don't find it offensive - but it is really draining having the same conversation with different strangers several times each day.

You: Where are you from out of interest?
Plummer: I'm from Spain
You: Oh lovely, whereabouts? Spain is such a beautiful country
Etc etc

Fine

You: Where are you from out of interest?
Plummer: I'm from Spain
You: 'Oh, ok' (awkward silence)

Not ok

I tend to ask "how long have you lived in X town" and "where did you go to school?" to politely get at someone's history.
Sometimes get amazing answers like "my dad was an ambassador and I went to school in five countries" or "I was born in Nigeria and went to the British primary school in Jakarta but then we moved back to Sussex where my family are from".

Oh my god I ask people where there from all the time 😲😶

To be fair I usually have a guess first during the conversation when it comes up, like "are you from Poland then?"
I'm interested in people!

I'm sure I'll be called "rude" now 😔

I sometimes ask if I don't recognise the accent, and it's from a genuine interest in learning about people.
I have an unusual surname and often have people ask where it's from, unfortunately it's rather boring answer that they get as it's not as exotic as it sounds.

Just copy the Queen and ask "have you come far?"

I have an accent which is not English but is within the UK. People comment all the time. I don't mind. It seems to be ok for people to comment on that. Are certain people exempt from this because of some reason?

This^^

I get the interest, I really do, but what is new to you is a daily occurrence to someone else, and therefore draining at times.

I'm mixed ethnicity and have a Yorkshire accent. Born here raised here. The amount of times I'm asked 'So where are you from?' which actually is code for 'Why are you brown/why do you look like you do?' It's annoying and also, is it really relevant for you to know!

Sometimes, if I'm feeling peevish I'll just let them keep asking until we get down the village I was raised in and then it's awkward.

Asked all the time it gets so boring to explain your native country.

There’s a risk of conflating two issues here. Ask someone with an obviously foreign accent where they come from is usually okay. They sound like they were raised in a different country so should be a pleasant and interesting conversation, hopefully?

Ask a black person where they come from, then when they say ‘London’ say ‘no, where do you really come from?’ you are racist.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63810468

a question probably best avoided on the whole