Labour to introduce Cheese Tax

[DadJoke]

The total cheese market in the UK is £4.5bn annually. I've heard that Labour will be taxing cheese at 20%, raising almost £1bn, which will be used to fund research into vegan alternatives. As a cheese lover I strenously object.

In the spirit of other threads which speculate wildly about taxes and benefit cuts Labour will definitely introduce, tell me something you are sure Labour will put forward at the budget. Links are optional. Trust me, bro is evidence.

This hole thread is about what the the Choaurce-ellor of the exchequer will be doing to our cheese allowance.

I think a lot of people think that.

But halloumi to say.

We can discuss our treasury strategy over a cheese board, but we will need use of Lord Alli’s Covent Garden penthouse, I can’t concentrate unless I’m based in an extremely expensive London postcode. #dreamteam

I wish posters would think Dairylea Caerphilly about taking this thread too seriously

You feta believe it!

As many of you know, MN can be a place where threads can get a little bit "fraught" but can I just say this thread has me and DH laugh out loud with every post. You could say we have been roquefort with laughter.

Imagine how much an Edam and the Ants reformation could make ?

Or ABrieC

Nothing American is real...

SUVs, lip fillers, tattoos, screechy laughs. Oh, and XL bully dogs or any made-up kind of dog like fuckerdoodles or wankerpoos.

Fuckerdoodle made me snort in public !! 🤣🤣🤣

I always wondered if you crossed a Shihtzu with a bulldog, would you get a Bullshit !!

My ddog is a representative of HMRC ( her majesty's revenue and cheeses)..he has tried in the past to impose new and every burdensome cheese taxes on us..he says the broadest tummies need to take the biggest burdens ( rude i say).
we currently have cheese tax payable when every cheese is cut /used ...he wants it paid whenever cheese packet is touched , whenever fridge is opened and he says that it is payable on each type of cheese not per use of cheese..so four cheese pizzas would incur 4 taxes...

Cat owner over here. Just choked on my oat latte.

These bastard vegan, champagne socialists.... blah blah blah etc.... 🙄🙄🙄

I thought we were re-joining Europe no? 🇪🇺🇪🇺🇪🇺

SUVs, lip fillers, tattoos, screechy laughs. Oh, and XL bully dogs or any made-up kind of dog like fuckerdoodles or wankerpoos.

Oh they plan to make biscuits out of those type of dogs!@MyBirthdayMonth

Evidence:

sallysbakingaddiction.com/soft-thick-snickerdoodles-in-20-minutes/

Will the cottage industry's have to pay a higher rate ?

And can pineapple as an additive to cottage cheese be taxed at quadruple rate. Vile stuff

If we disguise cheese as something else, say for example string, then no one will notice and no tax will be due

Apologies, OH made me post these , as he has been thinking Caerphilly about cheese since I started laughing my socks off.
No cheese and socks comments will be made by either of us

Just adopted a rescue dog, she’s learned the sound of the fridge door means cheese within 24 hours. Slightly worried she’s an undercover tax inspector.

Never been an issue for me. Elasticated trousers FTW

This Is adorable! Hounds Must Receive Cheese!