Husband said 'nice comb-over' to a man at a work drinks event

[Ramsgarthy]

My husband was at a networking drinks event for lawyers last night in London.

He is from Northern Ireland and when another man heard his voice, they said to him, 'you sound like you should be on Crimewatch'.

I understand that this was meant to be a joke (the idea being that he sounds like he's from the IRA). it is not a great joke.

But my husband replied sarcastically, 'nice comb-over', referring to the man's attempt to cover up his bald patch.

The man replied, 'now you're getting personal'.

No drinks had been had at this stage.

I think my husband's reply about the comb-over was unkind and uncalled for, because it was about his personal appearance, and would make him feel self-conscious. Do others agree?

The other guy started it with a comment verging on xenophobic. Asshole alpha male thinking he’s hilarious and then he didn’t like it when someone gave it back. He shouldn’t be giving it out if he can’t take it.

It's all a bit immature tbh. I'm not one to ever advise people to come back with immature put downs. I do see why your husband was annoyed though. It's incredibly insulting and I see that as far more offensive than the comb over!
I think you need to back your husband up here and show him some support. In this situation I'd absolutely expect it from a partner. Yes it's immature but the other guy was incredibly insulting and inflammatory. He got what he deserved tbh.

They both sound like a pair of twats tbh, comb over guy to start with then your DH for his childish retort.

The other guy deserved it! If he hadn’t been a xenophobic prick, your DH wouldn’t have responded in kind.

The original man's comment was worse. It was from nothing AND based on xenophobia. Yes, your DH's was mean but not as bad.

Both were acting like immature idiots though.

The other bloke shouldn't dish it out if he can't take a retort.

its no more 'personal' than what he said.

i bet your husband is so pleased you have his back 🙄🙄

Both behaved unprofessionally but the other twat started it.

I’m Irish and have experienced IRA “jokes” too. Your husband was right to say what he did.

Good on him. The other guy is a bastard who knew exactly what he was doing. Glad your DH was quick enough to take the wind out of his sails.

Good on your DH.

He was giving it back. The other man - jeez. Nasty prick might think twice next time.

I think your DH was right.

I have had comments made about 'The Irish' and it isn't funny.

I think they both sound like dicks. The other guy started it, but your husband could have been classier

No, good come back I think.

So pulling up your DH on his accent wasn’t personal? Imo it was. I’m not Irish btw.
Comb Over was deliberately offensive and deserved Mr. Ramsgarthy’s quick retort. He tried to diminish your DH and failed.
@sprigatito and I applaud him.

He deserved it, like calling someone with an Irish accent a criminal isn’t personal.

Three more supporters have appeared while I was writing.
👏

Reasonable response I think.

Either the man was trying to belittle your husband, in which case he blocked it.

Or it was a misjudged attempt at bonding banter, in which case, returned in kind.

Yeah good on him. What a pillock the other guy was. Who says that?!

Considering the history attached to his comment, I think your DH was incredibly restrained.

The guy saying about crime watch to your dh was a rude twat and completely deserved your dh’s response. Perhaps the man will think twice before being rude to the next person.

Good for your DH to not just take the insult as a "joke".
It was personal, so giving back a personal retort was appropriate.

At least he didn't say, "Does your comb-over act as a sail on a windy day?"

I think telling someone their accent makes them sound like a criminal is pretty personal. Also accents are more a part of you than a hairstyle, which is a choice.

I think your husband could have gone for the higher ground while still letting his feelings be known. However the other guy is clearly a dick.

You are so wrong to dismiss what the other guy said to your H as a joke and then criticise him for his comeback. Unsupportive of you. Don’t you like him?

Men are frightfully fragile about their hairlines. This guy proves it by sporting a combover.

Since your husband was insulted first, that was the best comeback ever.

I think it’s (bald) spot on.

Right!