CF allotment thief part 3: The ‘plot’ thickens and auditions begin for the west end musical

[YaMuvva]

Just creating one now before t’other fills up. Will post updates when I have them

Last thread https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5048540-cf-allotment-thief-part-2-the-battle-of-barbara-and-the-beansprouts?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=share

✊checking in - spade at the ready 🍿

I can't believe you're on thread 3! 🤣

You're really dragging this out, eh.

In for the vegetable themed puns.

Well on its way to becoming a Mumsnet classic. I'll be in the front row at the West End musical.

Enjoy your hike and I hope everything works out for the best, and you don't end up getting chased off your own land by an aggressively finger-clicking allotment gang.

You concentrate on the West End casting, I’m working on the Hollywood remake.

If ‘We Bought A Zoo’ is anything to go by, at least one of you will have a spurious romance with Scarlet Johansson by the time it makes it to being green lit.

@YaMuvva can I ask what style this west end (lets face it, Hollywood blockbuster) is going to take? Will it be Grease-esque where Claire Foy and Simon Baker end things by flying off in a shiny wheelbarrow as all the 'allotment' holders dance and sing that the drug baron Barb has now gone?

Or maybe some sort Bob Fossy style of intense dancing (but done with the interpretation of gardening)?

Far too invested in this 😂

Part 3?!?!

I've been following silently.

What an absolute nightmare. I don't know how you would even shift her but your previous suggestion with notice sounds kind and considerate. But you're still missing out on enjoyment of your land.

Following, interested to see how it works out

We went to view a flat quite a few years ago now. It was a victorian four in a block all with main doors and at the back the upstairs and downstairs flats on each side of the building shared a back alley which led to the back garden. On the land registry, there was one huge shared garden and a shared basement which would have been the old coal house. At some point over the years it had been agreed that each flat should have its own garden and the big garden had been carved into 4. They were all fenced off and clearly 4 seperate and different gardens with entrances either to right or left of the shared alley. The basement had a small door which was on the lower left flats section of the garden. Although it belonged to everyone, only the bottom flat owner actually used it. Over the years, people came and went and the only person with a key was the bottom left owner. The bottom left owner had told the upstairs owner they had the key to the basement but hardly used any of the space and encouraged them to share it. To provide privacy they build a wall dividing the basement in two and to avoid having to regularly enter via the neighbours garden, upstairs left owner excavated through the floor where their staircase to the back door brought them to ground level. They had a small staircase to the basement installed and had turned the space into a gym. The issue was that on the deeds the garden was still all shared so at any point any current or future owner could decide they preferred another garden and start using that one instead. Likewise with the basement, someone could request access and they now have a staircase straight into someones house! We absolutely loved the flat but were advised strongly not to go ahead because of the potential for future legal battles. Yours is the opposite problem where the deeds clearly state you own the land so hopefully have an easier ride. Id be wary about calling the police on Barbara if you dont need to because it may make your house more difficult to sell if you have to declare a neighbour dispute.

I reckon the Hollywood remake is going to be Mary Poppins, the original stylee with terrible British accents and shedloads of fake greenery.

You need Jilly Cooper to screen write this for you and add a bit of, 'allotment bonking' to the mix.

Is your husband by any chance, swarthy or handsomely dishevelled?

Has anyone else been imagining Babs as Barbra Streisand? Belting out “who told you you’re allowed to rain on my parade take away my allotment?”

OP, I’m here for all the posters jealous of your new found fame 😂

Or maybe a Ted & Ralph vibe? 😜

Gosh, what a lot of posting you've done OP.

Does OPs hubby have the physique to pull off a pair of white jodhpurs I wonder?

Pull off as in wear, although pull off would then send us into the Magic Mike realms....now off on a brain tangent that he and some of the fellow notallottment men could do some sort of Yorkshire based Full Monty/calendar girls (men) style thing??

Checking in - Let me know if you need anything - seeds, flask, trowel, portaloo 🤣

What would Barbara's ( or should we now call her Babs( role be in all this?

Have you found out yet why your solicitor didn't look at the Title? Ie why your solicitor didn't do the first thing any conveyancer has to do?

Celia Imerie for Babs. Sweet on the outside but with balls of steel

Loving this thread. Thank you OP and others for making me really laugh re the dramatisation options.

Imelda Staunton for Baps. Sorry Babs.

She can channel her Delores Umbridge - seemingly sweet but actually a a sandwich short of a picnic crazyness

Ready!

OP I have just happened to look on FB Marketplace and I have a local Barbara (no word of a lie) who is selling all her garden ornaments ... made me think of you!