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Things you simply cannot be arsed with anymore

244 replies

TheEverlovingFork · 21/03/2024 14:45

Now I'm in my 40s there's so much I simply can't be arsed with and I don't know if this is normal -I am hitting meno a bit early for medical reasons as confirmed by my doc. Here are a few things I recently threw in the fuck-it bucket:

Fiddly care instructions on clothes: like 'Can only be dry cleaned on a tuesday in the rain by a man whose name begins with S' who has the FUCKING TIME if it isn't easycare it's basically out of my life at this point.

Guilt guilt and more guilt about whatever standard for women I'm failing to hit this week. This is my face/body/newly grey hair piss off.

Over-fawning socialised bs at work or what I call the F-email, you know, where you have to put friendly little exclamation marks and non-confrontational jollity on every damn thing because women can't be to-the-point and factual without being hag bitches. No problem if not!

Most men and whatever they're doing. Do it somewhere over there and be quieter while you're doing it thanks.

Pandering to everyone's different hurt political feelings, I am an adult and can respectfully disagree on an issue. I understand how incredibly emotive a lot of what's going on in the world is, but I no longer have time for 'your opinion upsets me and that makes you a bad human being, actually'

Anyway - gosh yes reading that back I can see why they're talking about HRT 😳

Is this normal for meno? Did you hit 40 and throw half your life in the fuck-it-bucket?

OP posts:
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EmmaEmerald · 21/03/2024 14:53

Everything on your list has applied to me since I was an adult.

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Katiesaidthat · 21/03/2024 14:59

I think a few on your list were valid since I was like 17...but yes I am hitting 50 this year and it has been magnified...the pandering one, I can´t be bloody bothered. And it shows on my face...

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SirChenjins · 21/03/2024 14:59

Oh, so many things - everything on your list and more. Housework is a big one, I just don't care anymore. The place is cleanish and tidyish, but I have no interest in doing any more. I like my job, but the whole team building/personal development/appraisal side of it just leaves me cold - I've worked for 30 years and I actually don't care what profile I am.

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BarrelOfOtters · 21/03/2024 15:01

Yep, not quite the same list, but I'm prioritising my health and people I actually like.

I'm sure the menopause has something to do with it.

Still working but no corporate bullshit....just doing the job.

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Bjorkdidit · 21/03/2024 15:05

EmmaEmerald · 21/03/2024 14:53

Everything on your list has applied to me since I was an adult.

Same here.

I think I filled my fuck it bucket before I'd left my 20s.

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TheEverlovingFork · 21/03/2024 15:08

Lol wish I'd been like a couple of PPs and had the men one down the moment I hit adulthood - would have saved me a lot of grief! 😂

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Alphabet1spaghetti2 · 21/03/2024 15:36

A lot of us earn our fuck it wings with age - I was around 50 when I realised a lot of things I used to care and worry (needlessly) about we’re beat abolishes to the fuck it bin.
I don’t pander to others anymore, I answer honestly if asked my opinion although I do check that they actually DO want my honest opinion first! I don’t do workplace politics or gossip, and don’t care if I’m the subject of it either. I’m no longer the first one to offer help/solutions I wait until I’m asked and then will prefer to help them get to the solution themselves rather than doing it for them. I don’t worry about make up/ expensive haircuts/fashion etc preferring to be comfortable. Diets etc can bugger off. Birthdays/Christmas etc are also in the fuck it bin unless you really really really are important to me, or are Dh or a cat or dog.

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CuttingMeOpenthenHealingMeFine · 21/03/2024 15:45

I turned 40 last year and agree with everything on your list.

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MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 21/03/2024 15:49

You could condense that to 'can't be arsed with people' and I'd agree.

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citrinetrilogy · 21/03/2024 15:51

I need another car. Last one has died on me, and the other day we found another one at a local garage that fits the bill.

Today I was supposed to go for a test drive in it, but I couldn't be arsed.

I sent DH instead. He rang me to say it drives okay, and he's bought it. The only thing I have to do now is change my insurance and I can't be arsed to do that either, but I suppose I'll have to do that bit whether I like it or not!!

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Houseplanter · 21/03/2024 15:51

Work do's
Any social events I don't want to do
Facebook
Straightening my hair

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xSideshowAuntSallyx · 21/03/2024 15:56

Going out, not sure why but I'd rather go to the gym/for a walk/watch crap on TV these days than sit in a noisy, crowded restaurant, eating over priced food unable to hear.

I enjoy going for lunch or day time drinks in a pub as generally it's quieter and more relaxed.

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MagpiePi · 21/03/2024 16:02

Wearing proper bras. It’s sports bras or crop top type ones.
Hair care - can’t remember the last time I blow dried my hair let alone straightening it. It is naturally wavy and quite thick and medium length and I haven’t paid for a haircut since before lockdown, I just trim the ends every now and then. But with no hair drying I don’t get split ends. I do still wash and condition it most days!

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ThreeEggOmlette · 21/03/2024 16:12

Most men and whatever they're doing. Do it somewhere over there and be quieter while you're doing it thanks.

This made me smile.
I quite like some men, I live with 3, but this resonates. So needlessly loud.

Agree about work BS & waste of time appraisals etc, but I cannot abide faffing anymore so I have stopped worrying about treading on toes, I'm happy to take the lead & keep people on task if it gets the project moving/meeting progressing.
Just get on with it so I can go home.

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OkayKinkade · 21/03/2024 16:35

Men.
People who talk over you, interrupt or talk incessantly about themselves.
How I look.

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Thatslife18 · 21/03/2024 16:36

Quite a lot in menopause but for me the first thing that came to my mind & it really grates on my nerves is this obsession some women have of posting 'Gorgeous' in FB friends photos.

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OkayKinkade · 21/03/2024 16:37

Oh and any bullshit about changing sex. You can't and I won't even counter a conversation about it now, at all, under any circumstances.

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ILikeItWhatIsIt · 21/03/2024 17:44

Menopause has me not giving a shit about anything, but somehow simultaneously being crippled with anxiety over everything

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EmmaEmerald · 21/03/2024 19:21

@TheEverlovingFork You specifically mention "fiddly care instructions on clothes"

I have attached the only guide you could ever need (need to click to see the start). I hope you like it 😁

Things you simply cannot be arsed with anymore
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Zephyry · 21/03/2024 19:42

@EmmaEmerald love that 😂

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TitusMoan · 21/03/2024 19:52

OkayKinkade · 21/03/2024 16:37

Oh and any bullshit about changing sex. You can't and I won't even counter a conversation about it now, at all, under any circumstances.

Agreed. Don’t give me that bollocks (metaphorically or literally). I haven’t got to my fifties and lived through periods, period pain, menopause and its attendant issues, sexist behaviour and patronising from men just to be told that being a woman is a state of mind… it’s actual FACT.

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BinkyBeaufort · 21/03/2024 21:12

All the sex/gender bollocks. Ie women with bollocks.
DH. Lovely man, sets my teeth on edge. Piss off with your endless wittering on about your fucking job.
Life, the universe and everything.

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HagBitch · 21/03/2024 21:27

Thanks for my new username @TheEverlovingFork 🙂! I'm embracing my hag bitch nature.

Once I've written an email, I edit it to make less wimpy - so I delete the word possibly, and replace the word think with believe etc.

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CaliforniaHereWeCome1 · 21/03/2024 21:33

All of the above and will also add dull people who have no basic conversational skills. I used to try to be polite and make an effort with colleagues/school parents etc but now I just can’t be arsed and blank them if they are hard work.

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Elsewhere123 · 21/03/2024 21:41

I'm sure you've heard of CBT, well I invented CBA when in my early 50s. Damn just googled it. Am a co inventor.

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