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Original poster

Would you offer to pick up your sister?

222 replies

aiceineonderlsnd · 29/12/2023 07:54

My sister is coming to see me today.
We are going for afternoon tea at a hotel in my village.
It's a 25 min drive to her house but she doesn't drive so will need to get a bus and a train then I pick her up from Durham train station .
We are meeting at 3 but she has said to catch connecting train she has to leave her house at 1pm.
I think the bus takes half hour then the train 1 hour.
Honestly I just can't be bothered driving 25 mins to pick her up and then 25 mins back home to the hotel we are going too.
Is that terrible?
I don't mind driving to Durham train station as it's only 5 -10 mins away
It's pretty windy today and forecast some showers so I think she's Hinting for a lift.
I've just replied saying okay will let you get sorted
Drop me a text when your nearly in Durham

OP posts:
BeadedBubbles · 29/12/2023 08:56

All those people saying book somewhere in between. Sounds like OP lives in the centre of Durham where there will be some nice places for afternoon tea. There may not be the same choice outside the city.

A posh afternoon tea often includes a glass or two of Prosecco. But unless you're planning a heavy drinking session, surely you could take your sister home for a couple of hours and then drive her home op? Or let her stay over? And of course you should pick her up in the first place!

Illbefinejustbloodyfine · 29/12/2023 08:57

Pick her up!

Ellie1015 · 29/12/2023 08:57

I would pick her up.

OlderandwiserMaybe · 29/12/2023 08:57

As you were obviously aware your Sister isn't driving ATM I don't understand why you picked a venue so difficult for her to get to?
She's been involved in a nasty accident - no wonder she's not keen on driving (especially in this awful weather!)
Honestly if it was my Sister I'd pick a venue close to her house and I'd drive there (and forgo a drink myself)
Whats more important OP - spending time with your sister or having a drink!!
You should definitely offer to pick her up.

dontforgetme · 29/12/2023 08:58

Pick her up op!

Bobje · 29/12/2023 08:58

Yes

Carnewb · 29/12/2023 08:59

thisnthat · 29/12/2023 08:36

I would pick her up! You sound very selfish. Unless she is always expecting lifts from you.
Although how can a 25min car journey take half an hour by bus and then an hour by train?

Quite easily if you're rural or in villages, you sometimes have to go in a different direction to get a link up with transport that's going where you want to go, because there's nothing even close to a direct service.
I haven't passed my test long but in that situation my sister would have done it one way and I'd have done it public transport the other, I'd have done it public transport both ways because I wanted to see her though and she'd have driven both ways for the same reason.

Justwanttocomment · 29/12/2023 09:00

Public transport in County Durham is rubbish. I’d make the effort to pick her up.

FatFemale · 29/12/2023 09:00

So what could be a 25 minute journey, your expecting her to travel for 1 hour (train) and 30 minutes (bus)? Wow 😯

Pineapplewaves · 29/12/2023 09:00

thisnthat · 29/12/2023 08:36

I would pick her up! You sound very selfish. Unless she is always expecting lifts from you.
Although how can a 25min car journey take half an hour by bus and then an hour by train?

My MIL's house is 25 minutes drive from our house but if I wanted to get the train there it's a 30 minute walk to the station, 25 minutes on the train then another 25 minutes on the bus. Or it's a 20 minute bus ride to the bus station, 40 minutes on a coach then a 20 minute walk to her house. A 25 minute drive can easily take a long time on public transport.

I think OP and her DSIS should have met half way too. Sounds like a lot of hassle for her DSIS while OP gets a lovely afternoon out with no grief.

Iwant2beJessicaFletcher · 29/12/2023 09:00

Taking my DC to nursery when I wfh often took longer than 25 minutes in rush hour due to traffic. Its absolutely no time at all.

Don't be mean, go & pick her up.

RepetitiveMotion · 29/12/2023 09:00

Unless this is a drip-feed then massive YANBU - just go and get her FFS!

RepetitiveMotion · 29/12/2023 09:00

Sorry YABU!!!

dun1urkin · 29/12/2023 09:02

This has got to be a reverse…

ThreeRingCircus · 29/12/2023 09:03

25 mins away is nothing and you'll be catching up with her on your drive from there to the hotel.

Put it this way, if you picked her up you'd have a 50 minute journey this morning and your sister would have a 1hr 30min journey back home this evening.

As you currently want it, you have a five minute walk each way and your sister will be on public transport for more than 3 hours. You know you're being selfish and lazy which is why you've posted on here.

ZenNudist · 29/12/2023 09:03

Of course I'd pick her up. 25mins each way is nothing and it's fair enough that she makes own way home. My dsis doesn't drive and dh and I happily collect and drop her off from time to time so she's not spending ages on shitty public transport.

gamerchick · 29/12/2023 09:03

I would. I pick up none driving friends as well if it means I get to spend more time with them. She's making her own way home and it's nasty out there.

WickDittington · 29/12/2023 09:04

You drive - why is she coming to you? YABU

Frangipanyoul8r · 29/12/2023 09:04

You have chosen a hotel near you so you can easily walk home after having a drink. Clearly a 25 min drive to pick her up is a trade off for your easy journey home.

Grimpo · 29/12/2023 09:06

Of course I would pick my sister up in these circumstances. What's so difficult about spending 25 minutes in a nice warm car with the radio on?

But I would also offer to help her get back to driving herself, e.g. by going out with her.

Birdcar · 29/12/2023 09:06

"Is that terrible?"

Yes

Birdcar · 29/12/2023 09:08

You drive, she doesn't. Why are you meeting in walking distance to your house?

HollyJollyHolidays · 29/12/2023 09:09

SideshowAuntSallyx · 29/12/2023 08:12

Why pick a place so convenient for you and so difficult for her in the first place? That's actually quite selfish.

This and yes of course you should pick her up!

ClairDeLaLune · 29/12/2023 09:10

Apparently Durham is the most Christmassy place in the country, according to recent “research”. But you seem devoid of the Christmas spirit OP. Go and pick the poor woman up. It’s not like you even have to take her home again after.

mylittkeitalianhome · 29/12/2023 09:10

So you’d make her travel for an hour and a half on public transport just to save you 10 minutes in the car? Do you even want to spend time with her? How utterly selfish!!