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Original poster

Would you offer to pick up your sister?

222 replies

aiceineonderlsnd · 29/12/2023 07:54

My sister is coming to see me today.
We are going for afternoon tea at a hotel in my village.
It's a 25 min drive to her house but she doesn't drive so will need to get a bus and a train then I pick her up from Durham train station .
We are meeting at 3 but she has said to catch connecting train she has to leave her house at 1pm.
I think the bus takes half hour then the train 1 hour.
Honestly I just can't be bothered driving 25 mins to pick her up and then 25 mins back home to the hotel we are going too.
Is that terrible?
I don't mind driving to Durham train station as it's only 5 -10 mins away
It's pretty windy today and forecast some showers so I think she's Hinting for a lift.
I've just replied saying okay will let you get sorted
Drop me a text when your nearly in Durham

OP posts:
margotrose · 29/12/2023 08:31

I think the fact that she can drive and is just choosing not to is a bit different.

Ramalangadingdong · 29/12/2023 08:32

Hey, golden child - So, it all works in your favour. She has to travel hours in the wind and rain while you are 5 mins away from the venue, plan to have a few drinks then saunter home while your sister struggles back home for hours in the wind and rain. Your sister should cancel. It's not worth it. Poor sister.

Tontostitis · 29/12/2023 08:32

Two of my best friends dint drive as they don't like it or didn't want to learn. It's really tough but driving them regularly adds an hour to outings. I've started getting the train.

Niallig32839 · 29/12/2023 08:33

I would definitely pick her up and then she is only getting the train home. If I was in her position I’d be tempted to cancel with the horrible weather and long journey on busy damp public transport for 4 hours out my day. No thanks!

Simplelobsterhat · 29/12/2023 08:34

jhy · 29/12/2023 08:16

1hr and 30 min train
Compared to a 25 min drive for you
Yes YABU

To be fair it's a 50 minute drive if it's 25 min each way so I don't think that's a fair comparison.

However, giving her a lift one way would be a nice gesture, as you have the luxury of being 5 mins from home on the way back so able to relax a lot more than she will if she has to get 2 forms of public transport plus presumably taxi to station on way home. Unless it was her that suggested meet somewhere so convenient for you but inconvenient for her?

MindHowYouGoes · 29/12/2023 08:34

I’d pick her up but I love my sister and want to spend time with her

GreatGateauxsby · 29/12/2023 08:35

I'd pick her up.

Especially as only one way and at a v reasonable time (it could be more convenient 2pm must be one of the quietest times of the day)

Changingplace · 29/12/2023 08:35

Jk987 · 29/12/2023 08:15

I'd pick her up and then she stay at yours that night. Or she gets a cab home. Enjoy!

Exactly what I was coming to suggest, pick her up, she stats at yours and you drop her at the station in the morning to get the train home.

But I’d also have thought about all this way before right now!

PheobeBebe · 29/12/2023 08:35

Yes I would pick up my sister. It's not far. And if you're already driving 10 mins to the station it's only an extra 30 mins round trip on top, which is nothing compared to what your sister will endure one way!

thisnthat · 29/12/2023 08:36

I would pick her up! You sound very selfish. Unless she is always expecting lifts from you.
Although how can a 25min car journey take half an hour by bus and then an hour by train?

margotrose · 29/12/2023 08:36

Ramalangadingdong · 29/12/2023 08:32

Hey, golden child - So, it all works in your favour. She has to travel hours in the wind and rain while you are 5 mins away from the venue, plan to have a few drinks then saunter home while your sister struggles back home for hours in the wind and rain. Your sister should cancel. It's not worth it. Poor sister.

The sister can drive and has a license, she's just choosing not to.

Redglitter · 29/12/2023 08:37

Seems a bit unfair to have picked somewhere so close to you when she has a distance to come. Somewhere central would be a lot fairer

Don't be so miserable, go & pick her up. It's only 25 mins

pickledandpuzzled · 29/12/2023 08:38

Why are you meeting near your house instead of near hers, as she’s not driving at the moment?

NumberTheory · 29/12/2023 08:39

If the accident was recent, or she was doing something to try and get back behind the wheel, I’d probably pick her up. But I would not feel as charitable to someone who wouldn’t even try to get back into driving.

Pelham678 · 29/12/2023 08:39

Simplelobsterhat · 29/12/2023 08:34

To be fair it's a 50 minute drive if it's 25 min each way so I don't think that's a fair comparison.

However, giving her a lift one way would be a nice gesture, as you have the luxury of being 5 mins from home on the way back so able to relax a lot more than she will if she has to get 2 forms of public transport plus presumably taxi to station on way home. Unless it was her that suggested meet somewhere so convenient for you but inconvenient for her?

Show quote history

Yes, but I'd look at it that the sister would have a 3 hour trip altogether as opposed to the OP's 50 minutes + 5 minutes walk home.

I agree, why did you make it close to you when you have the easiest form of transport (car).

pickledandpuzzled · 29/12/2023 08:39

Or is there an easier mid way you could do? Get her from the bust station rather than the train stat? Save her half an hour?

Els1e · 29/12/2023 08:46

Yes, I would pick my sister up but I like and care about her.

Ginnnny · 29/12/2023 08:48

Pick her up! Jesus it’s your sister, don’t be selfish. As you point out the weather is going to be crap which could affect her public transport - pull your finger out and pick her up.

PinkflowersWhiteBerries · 29/12/2023 08:50

If you care about her enough to meet her for afternoon tea, for goodness sake pick her up. You can both have a drink if that’s what you want, and maybe a heart to heart about her not driving - kindly, as in you support her, not berating her for your inconvenience.

AGoingConcern · 29/12/2023 08:50

Jeez, go pick her up.

And next, time schedule tea a 5 minute walk from her home instead of yours if you’re the one with a car and can’t be arsed to go pick her up.

Zonder · 29/12/2023 08:50

Cancel the booking and book a place 5 minutes from her house.

Askmeanything1 · 29/12/2023 08:53

I would go and get her at the very least.

Tweety79 · 29/12/2023 08:54

Yes, I would pick up my sister and take her home.

strawberryshortcakescat · 29/12/2023 08:55

Yes I would pick her up.

Yikes101 · 29/12/2023 08:56

I’d definitely pick my sister up and have 50 minutes in the car rather than her spend 90 minutes on public transport. I can’t guarantee she’d do the same for me however.