Mum is overweight but dad and kids aren't

[ChocolateHippo]

Just musing over this. What do you think when you come across a family where the mum is overweight but the dad and kids aren't?

The family in question are relatively well-off, the dad does several sports (cycling, training for various events) and the kids each do several out-of-school activities a week. The dad and kids are very fit and active. I know the mum used to do some hobbies/sports pre-DC.

Just curious to know whether other people tend to think the same thing that I do in this scenario.

But I have no idea what you think.
There could be many, many reasons for this situation.
For example I put on weight during my pregnancies (and not by 'eating for two!) which has been very hard to shift.

Ok so what do you think OP?

I’d think nothing tbh, there’s a million different reasons why a member of a family could have a different weight or fitness level, it’s not something I’d try and guess or think much about.

There are loads of families like this mine. I would barely notice.

This is my family. Hopefully you just think you want to be friends or oh how nice a happy family, since how the size of my arse developed is literally none of your fucking business whatsoever.

What a strange question- I don't think I have any specific reaction to that situation. What is yours?

I wouldn’t even notice?

Im not sure I would think anything but since you put it out there ...

Maybe she does doesnt enjoy sports/ exercise
Maybe she would love do but doesnt get time and dads a bit selfish
Maybe she has a physical issue that means she can't?
Maybe she loves eating?
Maybe she likes being curvier?
Maybe he likes her curvier?
Maybe her hobbies just aren't active ones?

Probably wouldn't think much. The mum being overweight could be for anything and the kids are healthy so it's not like they're all going home and stuffing their faces everyday.

Why, what do you think?

I don't think anything anything. I've got better things to think about which don't include judgements on people's weight.

I would think that the mum is less active than the rest of them or she eats more than she should. But to be honest, I’d not give it much thought at all.

I don't think anything. Really racking my brains and I can't imagine what you think op. Whatever it is, I don't think it's a thought of the masses.

In my case I think I'd be even bigger if I wasn't with my slim fit hubby and kids. So if you're looking at me and my family you can think "she's a greedy pig" cos that's why 😁

I think you should probably mind your own business.

I'm obese (just over the threshold), DH and DD are healthy weights. When DH and I met I was skinny and very fit, I now have complex hormone imbalances, that despite a pituitary scan and many many blood test, the endocrinologists still hasn't managed to diagnose.

Ooo tell us your thoughts OP!

I'd probably think she puts everyone else first and prioritises raising the family. She would probably love to have more time for herself

This is my family - do enlighten us OP 🙄

Probably the usual, less time or inclination to do sports fitness.

and I imagine the activity of the kids and dad leave less time for her if she was so inclined.

most likely she’s not bothered

My DC all look slim like I did as a child. But I have put on loads of weight over the last few years. It could happen to anyone 🤷🏻 I would just think that the woman in that family isn't getting opportunities to exercise or life is stressful or a combination of health problems too.

I'm overweight (typical comfort/emotional eater) but I have married a slim man and my three teenage kids are all slim - either because they've inherited his genes, or because I've worked hard at not passing my issues with food onto them.

We're all active - in fact DH is the least active. I run (yes overweight people can run) and the DC all play team sports to a fairly high level.

I wouldn't really think about it, there are too many variables and it's none of my business.

I suppose from the info you've given perhaps I'd query whether the mother gets time to do any of her own activities given she clearly likes some sports but apparently doesnt do anything anymore, but even that doesn't necessarily link in with her weight - lots of people are fairly active but still overweight etc. And, again, unless she was a close friend of mine and actively unhappy she didn't get time to follow her own interests any more it wouldn't really be for me to pass judgememt!

I'd probably think she puts herself last to look after everyone else, isn't getting enough sleep and that her family should take care of her more often.

I would think that fatshaming is for the shallow and judgemental

I don't think I'd give it any thought tbh, people are different shapes and sizes.

Op, if you are asking because you are the mum in question, no one is judging or thinking there is something noteworthy about family's different weights. And if there is, that's their problem not yours and they're not someone whose opinion is worth caring about.

The mum is too busy facilitating the kids activities and the dad prioritises his own hobbies over family time