The thing is... it's "men", though, isn't it. It's always men.

[Wilferton]

It's only really dawned on me in recent years. The conversations we all have about what "countries" or "states" are doing to eachother, the terrible crimes against women, animals and children, particularly the sexually motivated ones. It's men. We're not talking about what a particular state or country has done, we're talking about what men have done.

So now, when I click onto my news app, I find myself thinking "What have the men done now."

I feel sad that I can only really now see it this way. Actually sad for many reasons.

I'm sure there's already a thread on this. But on mumsnet you're not wrong it's always mens fault.

Now move on and ask, if it is all down to men, WHY do they do this? Because without a valid answer to this question, there is no solution.

Why is down to women to figure this out?
Even if we do it won't stop them

Men need to be fucking accountable for their own actions but they won't be, they just don't care.

My own husband said the other day the world would be a better place if men just died out and left women in peace.

I started work in an office full of women and it may have clouded my views but women are bloody awful.

Are women across the world raping, murdering and enslaving men? Have we ever had any country where women alone held political power and denied men the rights to a political voice, to their own property, to education, to their own names, to access to well-earning and important professions that shape the society they live in? Do we have any such countries now?

The women I work with are great!
Men use banter to rip into each other, women are supposed to be polite so the environment can appear to be repressed toxicity. On the whole, I think women are supportive of each other.

Your anecdotal evidence doesn't compare with the evidence that men in general cause more misery, suffering and deaths.

Yes.

Now will come the whataboutery because it’s always women too 🙄

In the context of this thread are they enslaving, raping, murdering, assaulting, trafficking or oppressing you?

You might want to have a word with HR if so.

Across the entire… let’s say mammal kingdom, aggression, competition and using females for breeding purposes are pretty universal. It’s probably an evolutionary hangover that comes up in social patterns and mores.

Yep. DH agrees as well.
The news the other day was ‘these two countries are fighting and bombing each other’ followed by ‘these two countries are fighting’ then ‘this man killed his wife’. So the top three stories were shit stuff that men do to others. Countless women and children dead because men were having a pissing contest.

Your OP definitely resonates with me, unfortunately.

In my experience some women can be just as nasty, spiteful and dishonest as some men. There are a lot of very unpleasant people in the world, regardless of sex.

I've found the best way to deal with it is to kick anyone unpleasant out of your home, and if you work with someone vile, change jobs.

I live with my lovely ds. The only people welcome in this house are my lovely friends, and ds' friends who are generally ok too. And I've found a job wfh four days a week and with decent, open and cheerful colleagues for the other day a week.

Now we don't put up with the nasty, spiteful, manipulative or stressy any more. It makes life much easier and more pleasant. Basically we've pulled up the drawbridge and retreated away from the road ragers and mouthy horrors. It seemed the only option. 🙁

Yep. It took me many years of namalt to realise that it’s always men.

They need to be given a damn curfew. Can't be trusted, stay indoors.

“Not just men” is almost as bad as “not all men”. Of course women can sometimes be as bad as men. My life and most of my family’s life has been utterly wrecked by my mother’s abuse and violence. But the women who are born/raised to turn out as they have are often emulating male behaviour, besides which, men overwhelmingly have the decision-making power the world over.

I see a lot of women voting for absolute cunts - which I assume means they approve of them being cunts.

Many of us are bringing up sons, so we do have some responsibility on their behaviour (especially if no responsible male role model in their lives). We need to get rid of the ‘boys will be boys’ mantra. We need to bring our sons up to be responsible human beings and give them the courage to be able to call out behaviour, rather than just not partaking in misogynistic or violent behaviour.

Because they can. Even when the court system does punish men who kill / rape / abuse women it doesn't always stick. Just look at today’s news regarding the murderer of zara aleena. And countless others.

The thing is, while the whatabouts will argue women are awful too, women who behave poorly are awful on a totally different scale and in a different way to men. It's not an axis of "all men are bad (with implied all women are good)".
We can say "men are always the instigators" without saying "all men are always the instigators" or "all women are therefore good" because men and women are not opposites, we are simply sexually dimorphic humans. If one group does something bad it doesn't mean the other is automatically all good.

Men are the originators of a lot of world problems that impact people deeply and profoundly on a global scale.

This is because they are predominantly the power holders. They are also prone to ruling by brute force (e.g. declaring war on each other) and ruling by fear and control (and money, as they are the main money holders too). They are larger and stronger (as a general rule) than women and children. Women are predominantly not able to defend themselves when men decide to hurt women, and women are largely dependent on the goodwill of men to stay safe. We have to rely on the "good ones" because the bad ones are out there.

What we really need is for shit men to stop stomping around going "ooga booga me got biggest bombs, me bomb you into ground" and to globally make a shift into a mindset of co-operation and collaboration against the existential threats that are going to end humanity if we can't get a handle on them.

Women in your office backstabbing you really isn't on the same scale and isn't a systemic disempowerment issue that threatens humanity as a whole.

Women can lie, cheat, steal, whatever, just like men. But our current patriarchal society means that men also are able to do these things from a position of power, which means the consequences for others are often worse, while the consequences for themselves are often less.

Yes. I am sick to the bones of my soul of men and their fanatical religions of the book whose only purpose is to control often in wicked and barbarous ways everyone but particularly women and their breeding ability - blaming us for getting pregnant, for being attractive, intelligent, independent etc.

For two thousand years or more we have put up with them. There are better and more civilised spiritual ways to be in the world.

Because they can and life shows them there are rarely any consequences.

Yes - that's what it is, isn't it. Everything that's in place - the structures, the justice system, it favours them. They are the ones with the power.

You're right, it's always men.

There's lots of sweet men around though.

I have a 3 year old son and I try to raise him to be a kind, sweet and considerate boy. He's very wild, but I try to get him in touch with his gentle side.

Overall, it is men who are responsible for the awful things in this world.

I don't have an explanation and I don't know the solution.

You're right, it's always men.

There's lots of sweet men around though.

I have a 3 year old son and I try to raise him to be a kind, sweet and considerate boy. He's very wild, but I try to get him in touch with his gentle side.

Overall, it is men who are responsible for the awful things in this world.

I don't have an explanation and I don't know the solution.