I'm stuck in the loo forever now aren't I?

[YesitsBess]

TW, bloody huge gallopy fucking spider.

I was having a nice day. I worked from home, had a nice dinner, settled down to watch a film with nary a care in the World.

During intermission I decided to go to the loo, and somehow managed to not see THIS WANKER until I was on the throne so to speak. She's approximately the size of a labrador.

She's frozen, I'm frozen.

I live here now don't I?

Yep you’re stuck there….

She's only got seven legs. I reckon I can outrun her.

Wow! Is that picture zoomed in? Are you in the uk? That happened to me as a kid. I tried to edge past it and it ran fast

See you in the morning, I’m off to bed where they’ll crawl over me in the night 😳

Good job you are on the toilet lol.

I am in the UK, broadcasting live from my toilet.

Happened to me, I jumped over it which I eventually decided was preferable to sitting looking at the ghastly thing. I hope you have someone to catch it for you, I wouldn’t want that wandering around.

Can you call one of your cheffy mates, the one with the Brulee Blowtorch would be best 👌

I DO NOT HAVE ANYONE AND I HAVE NO WEAPONRY TO HAND. SEND AIRSTRIKE.

Do you have slippers on?

Throw your phone at it 😱

If you get a saddle you could ride that!

Oh I'd get off the loo. Those fuckers will pop up in the exact same place two days later like clockwork. Which is why is dislike spiders inside the house. They run off but then keep popping back up to double the fun.

Take a a glass with you tomorrow......

Any hairspray within reach? Or hair mousse?

Don't do this

Waft some toilet paper at it, it can fit under your door. Once you are *ahem decent you can open the door and find/catch/release her at your leisure. We have a plastic cup and card permenantly upstairs for just such emergencies.

I do not have slippers, I recently did have slippers on but now do not. I am consumed with regret.

She clearly has form for fighting, she's been prepared to lose a LEG prior to this.

I live on the first floor, what the actual heck is she even doing up here?

I’ve got nothing on, I’ll come over with a bit of kitchen roll and overpower it.

Throw a loo roll at it! Then run😬

Ffs it's a spider. No need for the theatrics, or a slipper. Just ignore it.

@thaegumathteth Sorry but that's exactly what I'd do! It's OP's house so it's up to her what she does....

get some loo roll, seize the spider in that, squish it and kill it then flush it

These are the kind of theatrics I can get behind in this kind of situation. Godspeed.

Can you throw a towel over it.

Do you feel all hard and righteous mocking somebody's genuine phobia? Grow up