Do you think you subconsciously judge other mothers' with 2+ fathers to their children?

[mysavinggrace123]

Could potentially have three children by three different fathers. (Already have two by two)

This isn't particularly something I would shout from the roof tops.

There is a part of me that feels I would have a tarnished reputation.

I mean, do I judge women with 2+ (children) fathers myself...?? Hmmm... I can't say I do, but I have definitely been 'surprised' by a few women who I would have never expected.

What do you think?

I definitely don't 2 plus with 2 dad's but I possibly would (and hate myself for it) for more than that.

I would be curious about the judgement of a woman with three or more children with different men. It doesn’t suggest the most stable situation.

Yes I'm afraid I do somewhat judge anyone (male or female) who has children with multiple partners.

Yes. Nothing subconscious about it.

Yes I agree with pp. Two different dads would be fine but somehow (sorry) three or more wouldn't be.

Btw - not being sexist here. I'd also think the same about men who had children with different women.

I would think that they probably don’t make the best life choices.

No I wouldn't

I fall into that catagory
.. But am of the mind of until you have walked in a person's shoes you should not judge..

Not with 2 fathers, I get that accidents happen or divorce etc, but with more than that I would wonder how and why someone would choose that as I would actively choose not to have more than 1 father to my children.

I it’s fine. If I wanted another baby it would have a different father to my first child.

For me 2 is the limit. 3 or more suggests someone keeps making the same mistake.

Same. I would have serious concerns over her judgement.

Two Dad's I wouldn't unless they were in very quick succession. More than two Dad's I would.

But tbh I judge anyone with more than two kids (multiple births excluded), but I would judge even more for more than two fathers

(Oh and yes I'm also equal opportunity with regard to judging both men and women for it)

Presumably the scandal of the multiple fathers would cancel out all the woman's own achievements and good qualities in your eyes, while the fathers themselves get to walk away whistling? Nice.

I'm afraid I would, and not really subconsciously either
2 seems ok, 3+ looks like a chaotic lifeaking poor relationship choices (unless widowed from 1 of the fathers).

Yes, sorry. I’m so grateful to have a wonderful step dad (so from a two father household originally) but I do feel for those children who have seen numerous partners come and go plus siblings who have their own family full of strangers.

I loved the stability as a child and thrived from it.

Yes I definitely do. Two is ok (and understandable really) but any more isn't.

I read today that a singer from Atomic Kitten (can't remember her name) is expecting her 5th child and they all have different dads!

Personally I think 5 children is far too many but all with different dads just seems so trashy. I can't even begin to imagine how the logistics of that work

Two, no judgment. First and second. Fairly common now. Anymore? Yes, sorry but I would judge.

Yep

Neighbour has 6 kids 5 dad's all children have fathers surname aswell so it's so obvious yes I judged her. I think 2 different dad's is enough I certainly wouldn't have more with a 3rd.

I know someone with 4. That's 2 too many for me. I mean it's quite common to have one failed relationship with children and move on but 4 ? At what point do you just think enough is enough. They aren't massive age gaps either. The worst part is she thinks she is gods gift to mothers and so patronising because I chose to have one and leave it 10 years before meeting someone and deciding to have a second.

Those who say they would judge the men too forget that these men usually walk off and reinvent themselves as single and childless. The women they leave behind don't get to do that.

It depends. 3 children with big age gaps? Absolutely not. 3 children close in age? Possibly. Depending on circumstances.

Some people are good at being single parents

2 dads is fairly normal I think. Half of marriages end in divorce and those people frequently go on to start second families with new partner's. Plus of course, all those who were not married, and simply started a second relationship.

I think 3 dads is less common. I can think of tonnes of women I know with second families. I can only think of one who's got 3DC each with a different man, and she's just cheated on man number 3 and currently single and I guess I do judge her, but more in the sense that her children span 7yrs, and I think FFS, spend more than 6mths with someone before deciding pregnancy is a good idea. It's 3DC, all with absent fathers. It's the first DC becoming separated from her dad, then meeting man 2, an instant sibling calling him daddy, then he's gone and now she's meeting man 3, another instant sibling calling man 3 daddy, then he's gone...