Is having a baby really that hard work?

[ithobsnnwnma]

I love babies and can't wait to have them but a few of my friends say it's such hard work in real life. I've babysat my cousins etc when younger so have some experience although limited I admit. What makes it hard?

DH didn't have a say, to be honest. It was my choice when I wanted to return to work and my breasts that I didn't want to use to breastfeed.

Affording full time childcare is definitely lucky, though that would've happened if I went back at 3 months or 12 months.

@SouthLondonMum22 You’ve said before about your partner being incredibly supportive, a team, equal everything. And it does sound you steer the ship somewhat.

My point is a lot of husbands would object to mother going back to work after 3 months and not BF. You were lucky no issue and husband happy to go with what you wanted for the baby.

Some couldn’t afford the extra 9 months childcare or to have FT childcare at all.

So… as I said lucky.

Good grief, why would a husband object to their wife going back to work at three months or not BFIng?!

I've seen several couples where this has happened with return to work, usually with the husband then taking nine months shared parental leave so a year in total. In the other case the woman was the main breadwinner and the employer didn't offer more than SMP so she had to go back in order to pay the mortgage...

And it's up to the woman what she does with her breasts, and for her partner to support her in that.

It wouldn’t occur to my husband to think he gets a say on when I go back to work or if I use my body to breastfeed.

That isn’t me steering the ship, that’s my husband rightly thinking that it’s up to me and me alone if I breastfeed because it involves my body or when I go back to work because why exactly would he get a say in when I go back to work? Especially since he didn’t want to be a SAHP either.

I hear ya - am pregnant and in almost exactly same boat with the same feelings as you! N nothing else to say besides you're not the only one

Every pregnant woman I've wished them a baby who will sleep. My DS didn't sleep through the night until he was 3 years old.

Sleep deprivation does a number on you. And then the worry. I thought I was going mad.

babysitting is just incomparable and I know everybody says this but you really will never know the feeling until you have one of your own.

I absolutely adore being a mum, I have a 6 month old and he’s only ever woken up 2-3 times a night so I consider him quite a good sleeper. However, I hold him for all naps or he doesn’t nap, if you’re a mum you will know a missed nap can equal total devastation and a really grumpy baby which nobody wants 😅 so my back is broken because I baby wear for half the day, and I never actually go into a deep sleep, always a light sleep, a half sleep if you will.

Theyre teething for like 2 years so screaming at own hands angrily, chewing, drooling is every day and trying to make sure they don’t grab anything dangerous/dirty etc is just a mental challenge cause your brain is always switched on.

My baby will only sit in his pram for short spurts but he’s getting better as he gets older, he has to co sleep after his first wake, he hates the car seat and is at an age where he wants to be entertained 24/7.

there’s no time to relax, my showers are 5 minutes, and it really is a big life change. With that said, I wouldn’t change it for the world, his smiles literally make me so happy and his little personality. As I said, I adore being a mum and every bit of hard is worth it for our little boy.