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Original poster

Pointless products that will never exist but you wish they did

164 replies

ditalini · 19/04/2023 14:40

I live on the 2nd floor and have a shared washing line out the back. I want a clip on thing that I can attach to an item of washing (say the thickest part of a pair of jeans, the bit that takes the longest to dry) and it'll send an alert to my phone when the load is ready to take in.

This will never exist because it's pointless for almost everyone in the world but I wish it did.

Any more?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
Dontlistitonfacebook · 19/04/2023 21:33

@AutumnCrow my grandmother would have loved that! She used to pay her children to tickle her feet.

Koalaslippers · 19/04/2023 21:33

Dubaibutwhy · 19/04/2023 21:20

A clip to go on your dashboard for putting parking tickets in. No more rushing to shut the door to stop the ticket flying away in the wind.

My old Octavia had one, it was great.

Macaronnotmacaroon · 19/04/2023 21:37

A pill that you could take once a day to give you complete sun screen protection. No having to apply and reapply messy creams, no patchy bits. Just take it in the morning on a sunny day and forget about sunburn.

Mostar · 19/04/2023 21:45

Macaronnotmacaroon · 19/04/2023 21:37

A pill that you could take once a day to give you complete sun screen protection. No having to apply and reapply messy creams, no patchy bits. Just take it in the morning on a sunny day and forget about sunburn.

Genius.

EveryoneButSam · 19/04/2023 21:46

thenewaveragebear1983 · 19/04/2023 16:32

Even just an attachment for your hoover that has a very small tipped nozzle like the size of a drinking straw. Considering how much use cars get from muddy outdoor gear, more so than any other place in your home, they are not designed to be kept clean efficiently are they?

Show quote history

This does actually exist, I have one of these: musthaveideas.co.uk/products/vac-mate

thenewaveragebear1983 · 19/04/2023 21:47

Dubaibutwhy · 19/04/2023 21:20

A clip to go on your dashboard for putting parking tickets in. No more rushing to shut the door to stop the ticket flying away in the wind.

My car has one of these, doesn’t everyone’s? It’s literally a little plastic piece on the edge of the windscreen for exactly that purpose.

Dontlistitonfacebook · 19/04/2023 21:47

@mrswishywashy1

Like this?

tickle robots (HQ upload)

not for sale, prototypes only!

https://youtu.be/YW-hh0-1W-g

thenewaveragebear1983 · 19/04/2023 21:47

EveryoneButSam · 19/04/2023 21:46

This does actually exist, I have one of these: musthaveideas.co.uk/products/vac-mate

Show quote history

I have one of those, it’s crap. And it doesn’t fit every vacuum either!

SirSamVimesCityWatch · 19/04/2023 21:48

JarByTheDoor · 19/04/2023 14:46

I want an attractive, tasteful lightpull, not garishly painted, not so flimsy that it flings about when pulled and not heavy enough to take chunks out of my wall, not so tiny that it's hard to get hold of but not utterly massive like it's a school toilet flush pull handle on a chain, in the shape of a mouse, where the cord is the mouse's tail. And not Disney themed. You'd think this would exist. It doesn't.

I love how incredibly detailed and well thought through this is. I want one!

Dontlistitonfacebook · 19/04/2023 21:48

@mrswishywashy1
@AutumnCrow

Or this?

www.newscientist.com/article/2365851-wearable-anti-anxiety-device-strokes-your-arm-with-a-furry-pompom/

chocolateisavegetable · 19/04/2023 21:53

A device that changes the duvet cover for you

CatMattress · 19/04/2023 21:53

Just showed DP this thread. He's an electronics engineer and recons he could make at least 4 of these, including the sock sorter. Place your orders now.

I'm in charge of marketing. It'll mostly consist of posting on mumsnet. #DreamJob #MadeForMe

Original poster
ditalini · 19/04/2023 21:54

NeverDropYourMooncup · 19/04/2023 21:19

These days he'd be wandering off with a box of capacitive soil moisture detectors like these https://www.hackster.io/rbaron/b-parasite-an-open-source-ble-soil-moisture-sensor-006441

and a laptop.

It's doable - and I want a part credit for the idea!

Show quote history

Its so tantalisingly with my grasp!

OP posts:
Sewfrickinamazeballs · 19/04/2023 21:57

Similar to a robot mower but one that goes around the garden and collects leaves and weeds from the flower beds

Plankingplanks · 19/04/2023 21:59

Tulipmonster · 19/04/2023 21:30

Glow in the dark duck tape for marking out the squeaky floorboards so you can tiptoe out of the baby’s room without waking them up again.

This exists!!!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Glow-Dark-Tape-Lasting-Premium/dp/B07CMXW94H/ref=mpssa111sspa?adgrpid=116692967506&hvadid=495275213229&hvdev=m&hvlocphy=1007021&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=7100716812223497933&hvtargid=kwd-302607688521&hydadcr=1821991816999&keywords=glow+in+the+dark+duct+tape&qid=1681937912&sr=8-1-spons&spcsd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9waG9uZV9zZWFyY2hfYXRm&psc=1

Dubaibutwhy · 19/04/2023 22:00

thenewaveragebear1983 · 19/04/2023 21:47

My car has one of these, doesn’t everyone’s? It’s literally a little plastic piece on the edge of the windscreen for exactly that purpose.

Show quote history

@Koalaslippers and @thenewaveragebear1983 I'm going to have to good look in my car tomorrow!

BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn · 19/04/2023 22:12

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 19/04/2023 17:52

An umbrella that goes up the inside of a rotary washing line, so that if the weather looks a bit dodgy you can just put the umbrella up to keep the washing more-or-less dry if you're out and can't, or don't want to, bring it in.

https://www.chimneysheep.co.uk/product/laundry-mac-outdoor-laundry-protector/

Regular Laundry Mac™ outdoor laundry protector - Chimney Sheep

The Laundry Mac™ protects washing from weather, so you can dry your laundry outdoors come rain or shine, wind or snow: get your laundry outside now!

https://www.chimneysheep.co.uk/product/laundry-mac-outdoor-laundry-protector

Cattenberg · 19/04/2023 22:14

Oi, I invented the body dryer years ago! I admit I didn’t get as far as deciding how it would work (nor could I have done), but it was totally my idea. I used to stay in the shower for far too long because I didn’t like stepping out afterwards.

I think the reason fake tan doesn’t last more than a week or two, is because your skin sheds and replaces itself. An orange full-body tattoo might work, but seems a bit drastic.

tabulahrasa · 19/04/2023 22:23

JarByTheDoor · 19/04/2023 14:46

I want an attractive, tasteful lightpull, not garishly painted, not so flimsy that it flings about when pulled and not heavy enough to take chunks out of my wall, not so tiny that it's hard to get hold of but not utterly massive like it's a school toilet flush pull handle on a chain, in the shape of a mouse, where the cord is the mouse's tail. And not Disney themed. You'd think this would exist. It doesn't.

Could you not get a felt mouse and sew in a normal small plastic pull?

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1088067072/needle-felted-life-size-mouse-white?click_key=372fc2f1f4b6f9072e2191678d2ceb1fd7dc5ff9%3A1088067072&click_sum=7282438d&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=felt+mouse&ref=sr_gallery-1-3&organic_search_click=1&bes=1

that sort of thing,?

Needle Felted Life Size Mouse White Mouse Mouse Statue - Etsy UK

This Felt Art item by CladyAnnDesigns has 676 favorites from Etsy shoppers. Ships from United Kingdom. Listed on 18 Apr, 2023

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1088067072/needle-felted-life-size-mouse-white?click_key=372fc2f1f4b6f9072e2191678d2ceb1fd7dc5ff9%3A1088067072&click_sum=7282438d&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=felt+mouse&ref=sr_gallery-1-3&organic_search_click=1&bes=1

TheIsleOfTheLost · 19/04/2023 22:24

@Macaronnotmacaroon I have often wanted this, only in calpol style as my kids wouldn't take pills. Quick syringe to the back of the cheek and all over sun protection without the banshee wailing, attempts to escape, or bite me. God only knows what the neighbours think I am doing to them.

Macaronnotmacaroon · 19/04/2023 22:28

TheIsleOfTheLost · 19/04/2023 22:24

@Macaronnotmacaroon I have often wanted this, only in calpol style as my kids wouldn't take pills. Quick syringe to the back of the cheek and all over sun protection without the banshee wailing, attempts to escape, or bite me. God only knows what the neighbours think I am doing to them.

Yes, a child friendly version would make summers so much easier!

JarByTheDoor · 19/04/2023 22:29

tabulahrasa · 19/04/2023 22:23

Show quote history

In my mind I guess I had a slightly stylised thing in solid brushed metal, or smooth matte black/white/grey ceramic, or something… that's very cute, though! Albeit possibly a little corpse-looking…?

tabulahrasa · 19/04/2023 22:39

JarByTheDoor · 19/04/2023 22:29

In my mind I guess I had a slightly stylised thing in solid brushed metal, or smooth matte black/white/grey ceramic, or something… that's very cute, though! Albeit possibly a little corpse-looking…?

Show quote history

Ah, I went fabric cause I have a fabric light pull (came with the house) and it’s the ideal weight.

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