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Original poster

DH to be doesn’t want a wedding ring.. at all?

213 replies

4EyesandBigThighs · 21/03/2023 13:21

Anyone roses DH not wear a wedding ring?

DP doesn’t want one at all, we get married this year. At first I thought it was because he works a manual labour job; so suggested a silicon ring and perhaps have a metal actual wedding ring put up sage and wear occasionally?

but he doesn’t want one at all and that’s thrown me a little. I mean, realistically it’s just a ring - but I liked the thought of seeing him with a ring on, that symbolisation that we are married maybe?

or am I just being silly?

OP posts:
Greensage · 21/03/2023 16:27

DH absolutely wanted to have one but only wear it for occasions. He hates wearing any kind of jewelry anyway. Mine needs resizing and I haven't been able to find the energy to arrange that (for the past 3 years...).

thesugarbumfairy · 21/03/2023 16:27

we got my DH one, but it lasted all of a day. He just hated it. Its no biggie. I dont wear my rings now either. They were cut off four years ago when I had to have an MRI and I've never had them resized. Its just a bit of metal.

Bansheed · 21/03/2023 16:28

MysteryBelle · 21/03/2023 16:12

I very much enjoyed choosing rings with my husband when we got engaged, we took a week off from work, traveling to our families to share the news, it was a magical week. I loved finding my wedding dress which I later found a picture of in a bridal magazine. It’s ‘fun’ and exciting for many people, that’s why @Parker231

It’s a big thing to get married, or have a child, or get a dream job or dream house, or a child (or you) graduating from college, they’re milestones that signify a happy change or positive growth in our lives and we celebrate by having ceremonies or sharing symbols of that. Rings don’t have to be, but can be part of the celebrating.

I love this!

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simbobs · 21/03/2023 16:33

When we decided to get married I asked DH if he would be wearing a ring, and when he said that he would not I replied that I wouldn't either. Nor did I want an engagement ring. I just don't wear anything on my fingers and seldom any kind of jewellery. I have never given it a second thought.

DrEllie · 21/03/2023 16:33

I used a ring that had belonged to my grandmother (not a wedding band, more like an eternity ring with 'diamonds') it always gets soap stuck in it and I feared losing it so I never wear it. Husband doesn't have a ring, not even one for the ceremony.

RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 16:34

My husband hasn't to my knowledge taken his wedding ring off since we married.

I take my wedding and engagement rings off at night, when I shower, when I bake, all the time really. Half the time I don't bother to put them on again afterwards. It doesn't mean I'm any less committed to our relationship. I just don't find rings very comfortable.

mynewusername2023 · 21/03/2023 16:41

My husband is the same, manual job where a ring could cause injury. So he doesn't wear anything while he works. The only time he wears his wedding ring is if we go out in the evening or at weekends if we go out. He doesn't wear one round the house.

I however wear mine 24/7 apart from when I'm in the shower (it's too big and kept in place with a keeper ring and the shower feels too risky).

reluctantbrit · 21/03/2023 17:02

DH has one and it lives in my jewellery box. I think he only agreed to a set because I wanted it. He hated it from day one and moved it to the other hand, it didn't fit properly and after nearly loosing it twice we agreed that it just doesn't work for him.

I don't see an issue.

CornflakesOnTheSolesOfHerShoes · 21/03/2023 17:10

It used to be pretty unusual for men to have wedding rings in the UK. My dad, FiL, BiL and grandfathers never had them, though my dad actually got one after about 35 years of marriage, from the same jewellers where they got my mum’s, in a fit of sentimentality. The original wording of that part of the marriage service in the Book of Common Prayer isn’t reciprocal - it’s “the giving and receiving of a ring” - though there’s now a two-ring version as well.

DH always wanted to have one for the wedding but thought he might not wear it much afterwards. In practice he hasn’t taken it off in 14 years, and I do like seeing it. But he’s unusual in the wider family.

CurlewKate · 21/03/2023 17:17

If he doesn't like wearing rings at all then fine. If he wears rings then I might possibly want to ask a question or two.

Toooldtoworry · 21/03/2023 17:24

Parker231 · 21/03/2023 15:59

I have lots of rings which I wear regularly. Have been married 26 years but never felt the need for a wedding or engagement ring

Show quote history

I don't feel the 'need' for one. Just liked the look of a ring so wear it. Tbh neither of us are bothered about whether the other wears a ring or not. A ring does not make a marriage as you quite rightly confirmed.

Calmdown14 · 21/03/2023 18:22

I bought my husband the thinnest cheapest gold band on Amazon. It was about £20 and just for the ceremony.

It would be dangerous in his work.

Doesn't bother me...but then I stopped wearing mine a decade ago when pregnant and never got round to putting it back on. It doesn't appear to have affected our marriage

FixTheBone · 21/03/2023 18:24

I wear mine on a chain around my neck.

For a multitude of reasons, but mainly I do a job wear I need meticulously clean hands, and secondly I found it quite uncomfortable.

I tried just wearing it on days off, but found that I occasionally forgot, or worried about it going missing, so wear it a chain and never take it off.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 21/03/2023 19:56

Mine wears one. He doesn't really do jewellery so opted for silver. He actually wanted wooden. He takes it off sometimes when he plays guitar in his band as it rubs and when he goes jogging. I wouldn't like it if he never wore it.

crosstalk · 21/03/2023 20:11

Neither DH nor myself wore wedding rings after a couple of years - me cos I don't like rings, him because his gashed his hand as he went for a catch at cricket. OP you could just omit that part of the ceremony and not wear a ring either? The best man will thank you ......

WildRosie · 21/03/2023 20:23

Your fingers, your choice is my philosophy. I'm not married but I wouldn't want a wedding ring. My Dad, uncles, eldest brother and BIL didn't/don't have them. I'm not a fan of jewellery in any case (except for plain, uncut lumps of ruby and sapphire I can hawk for large amounts of cash!).

RockhoppersLovePoppers · 21/03/2023 20:38

My husbands ring is titanium. For various reasons I don't wear either of my rings unless I'm going out a nice night with my husband. He's fine with it. He doesn't take his off

Parker231 · 21/03/2023 20:54

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 21/03/2023 19:56

Mine wears one. He doesn't really do jewellery so opted for silver. He actually wanted wooden. He takes it off sometimes when he plays guitar in his band as it rubs and when he goes jogging. I wouldn't like it if he never wore it.

Why wouldn’t you like it if he didn’t wear it.

AnonKat · 21/03/2023 20:55

My husband stopped wearing his after he got it caught a few times at work. I stopped wearing mine as I have dry skin.

Doesn't make me less married.

Parker231 · 21/03/2023 20:55

crosstalk · 21/03/2023 20:11

Neither DH nor myself wore wedding rings after a couple of years - me cos I don't like rings, him because his gashed his hand as he went for a catch at cricket. OP you could just omit that part of the ceremony and not wear a ring either? The best man will thank you ......

We omitted the section about rings from the ceremony - don’t think anyone noticed!

PlacidPenelope · 21/03/2023 21:45

4EyesandBigThighs · 21/03/2023 14:15

Yeah I think he would compromise and wear one for the wedding day; he’s not being intentionally difficult he just doesn’t fancy it so I’m sure he’ll be able to manage a day wearing one 🤭 I did suggest a tattoo in placement of a ring.. but that suggestion didn’t go down too well either 😂

But why go to the trouble of buying one, him compromising on the day to just wear it for the day and then put it away and forget about it? It's just a waste all round, why can't you just accept that he doesn't want a ring?

You admit he's not being difficult, why can't you just respect his choice?

Polis · 21/03/2023 21:48

My husband doesn’t wear a ring. Neither did his dad or grandfather. It’s the same on my side of the family. Men don’t wear wedding rings.

Elphame · 21/03/2023 22:29

DP didn't want to wear a ring so I don't either.

It'll be 39 years married this autumn.

vickylou78 · 22/03/2023 12:57

Is get a really cheap one for the wedding day and he car wear it one day a year for anniversary dinners and special occasions etc. My husband hardly ever wears his ring. Its fine.

IncompleteSenten · 22/03/2023 13:00

Neither of us wear them. I hate wearing jewellery and my husband lost his ring years ago and we never bothered replacing it.

We know we're married. 🤷

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