'But women do that too...'

[workistoomuch]

Discussing the Epsom college case with DH and I said 'how can a man to do that' and dh went mental saying women do that too and that I should say person and I'm associating him with it. I am unbelievably angry at him because it is a man who did that. What is wrong with saying that?!

I pointed out even if I had said human that associates him as he is a human. I could have said mammal, I could have said brown eyed person, but I said man and he's flipped out. He won't respond to my question about being human.

I don't understand how he can't see how ridiculous he's being and that he sounds like some kind of mens rights activist 😓

I agree with him.

Was there a post about the woman who was arrested for stabbing her husband through the head around Christmas time?

I don’t recall seeing one.

Ask him for some examples of murder/suicide committed by women. Murders of children by their angry mothers.

He’s an idiot.

We heard the headline when it happened and DH said “god I bet he killed them then himself”. Because, you know, that’s what nearly always happens.

I think about 80 women were killed by a man in the U.K. last year according to the Counting Dead Women Twitter feed.

If women were killing men at a similar rate I think we'd know about it.

Its the fact he doesn't want me to label this person as a man. I'm not saying only men do this. I'm saying this was a man who did this.

It makes me worry about what he has been reading online against women.

I can't honestly remember a woman murdering her husband and child then killing herself

I can find you stories of women killing their kids, husband, groups, crowds. I don't want to because who TF wants to seek that info. It's there if you want.

Most violent crime is committed by men. It's a fact, boring and universal.

Does he really deny that?

I mean we all knew why the story would be, didn't we? We knew it would be a male family annihilator. And it was.

Same as any mass shooting, any CSA ring, and on and on. No NAMALT. But TMMALT (too many men are like that).

He'd rather argue with you than do something about it. That's why he sounds like an MRA. I've volunteered with male offenders, I do something.

I can remember hearing (rarely) about women who have killed themselves and their children, and of course women commit murder of partners too. But the whole family being killed and then the perpetrator killing themselves seems to be mostly a male thing.

And the statistics are quite clear that most violent crime is committed by men. Some women are violent too, but that doesn't change that the biggest danger to women is men.

There have been quite a lot of cases of women with severe PND who have killed their children and tried to kill themselves at the same time, with varied results. You don't hear of them killing their partners because they're usually doing it because they're isolated, severely mentally ill and struggling without support.
Totally different to these self centered bastards who think their children and wife are their property to dispose of as they see fit.
YANBU.

Your dh needs to give his head a wobble.

Absolutely women are capable of atrocious acts of violence. However, data shows that these crimes are overwhelming committed by men.

Even when women do commit serious violent crime such as acts like these, the motivations and precursor incidents are different.

If we want to tackle these issues we need to be able to discuss them accurately. Saying 'People' do these things is just obscuring the obvious so that some men don't get sad.

90% of family annihilators are men.

Men are far far more lost to commit violence than women. This is a fact that cannot be denied. The stats are all there.
anyone saying “but but women do this too” sounds pathetic. I wouldn’t normally be this harsh about it but it is pathetic. In the wake of Epsom and so many other cases, it’s pathetic and damaging to go searching out cases of women who have killed. It misses the point entirely which is that there is a male violence problem which is not going away

Far more “likely”. Bloody autocorrect

Screen grab of a Canadian study.

I looked at UK, Australian, Canadian and others. Male perpetrators, women and child victims. The vast majority.

There was recently an item on the news where relatives talked about their female relative who had been killed by a man, most of them by a partner/husband or family member.

The report said 90% of women killed, were killed by men. It was depressing but my first thought was "I thought it would be more than 90%"
It wouldn't surprise me if 90% of men killed were killed by another man either.

@MrsTerryPratchett would you mind explaining what the graphic means? Apologies if this makes me sound thick but I can't understand it.

Sorry. I cropped too much! It's the victims' sex and relationship to the perpetrator.

I make the victims 24 women and one man.

Ah OK thank you. Seems to show that women are much more likely to be killed by someone close to them. And I'm guessing men are more likely to be killed by someone unrelated.

Also women are more likely to be killed in the home whereas men it's outside the home.

Not all men, but always a man

There's a case in Northern Ireland -

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-64573673

It's not getting publicity across the uk but it was a woman who killed one child and tried to kill the other.

He's being a twat OP, as are all the people who respond similarly.

Well she doesn't sound like a woman driven to the edge

I just shared the news story. Because it's literally on the bbc today.