Revenge secret Santa for the office b£#@!

[Surewhyknot]

I'm looking for the worst, most subtle insulting secret Santa gift for the office stirrer.. limit is £10 and we're opening them in person.

I'm torn between a pair of secondhand socks or a homemade loo roll cozy al la your grandma!

What are the worst you've had? Can I cast insult without being too overt??

I once got “diet cutlery” and it made me feel awful awful it was meant as a joke! I know this person may not be the kindest but don’t go to their level- be better than trying to humiliate someone like that.

While I think you're just a lazy journo looking for ideas I will answer anyway.
We stopped doing SS (I always boycotted it as we're all employed adults who don't need faffy gifts) and we now contribute to the food bank instead.

You sound as bad as her.

What a depressing thread. A quiet older colleague who came over as a bit old fashioned once got a Secret Santa copy of the Kama Sutra and pink fluffy handcuffs. She was one of the kindest people you could hope to meet and so upset, asking if that was what people thought of her - it was Christmas Eve, fgs. I remember her face when I see the donor now on social media spouting about being kind (though mainly meaning being kind to her).

It really is quite frightening how low many people will sink when they believe they have the guise of anonymity.

Also pretty depressing to see the internalised misogyny behind suggestions like "Femfresh."

How have we come to despise each other this much?

Michelle Obama.

Sorry but I have to disagree with this. They treat you like shit and you are extra nice to then?
Surely all this is doing is teaching them if you are a bitch you get better service?
Meanwhile the polite, decent quiet person in the corner misses out on help.

This thread has shown that a lot of money is wasted on crap nobody wants with SS. Does anybody actually enjoy doing it, or are they just going along with it because it's what happens every year?

Take the high road. Office environments can be hostile as it is without fanning the flames.

It might not be pleasant to work with the person in question but it’s your responsibility to respond with kindness.

Are you sure she's the nasty one?

God, there are days I can be nothing but pleased to work from home.

So I once gave the office spinster an inflatable boyfriend. She was actually lovely and I was young and thought it was funny. She said oooo I don't get many gifts and was excited, everyone else were getting candles or smelly stuff. Her face looked traumatized when she opened her gift and I felt terrible! I really did think it would be funny but totallllllly read that convo wrong.

What disturbs me… is that so many on this thread will be mothers

I had a B.O problem. It is hormonal. I shower every day. Use deodorant and always carry a bottle of perfume which I use a lot. At work I have two friendly colleagues who give me the heads up if I am starting to smell, so that I top up my perfume/deodorant/use wet wipes. It is very upsetting for me that I have to do all this. It is a horrible way to live.

One year we had SS in the staff room. All opened presents in front of each other. I had brought in two presents in case someone was left without a present. I was really excited. In front of 50 colleagues, I got to open 4 cans of right guard deodorant. I was crushed. No one laughed. To this day I still haven’t told my DH what I got that day because I was so humiliated. I started getting teary just writing this. Don’t do this to someone.

I'm not sure I'm adding anything much to the debate, but don't do something like this. Seeking public humiliation of someone for whatever reason is pathetic and you don't lower yourself to the level of someone you think is a nasty piece of work. Go for something generic and inoffensive if you don't want to get her something she'll actually like.

❤️❤️❤️

This is absolutely horrible. Don't be a dick. Some of these stories are genuinely gutting.

Secret santas are never secret for long. They will work out that it was you. Don't do anything you wouldn't do openly.

You can give something a bit grannyish like lavender scented drawer fresheners, but don't be actively vicious by giving anti-wrinkle products as per pp suggestions.

@Fairyliz - the person is not getting a better service in that example. They're getting the exact same service as everyone else, just the person dealing with them is not reacting to their behaviour. Also some people in pain/distress/worried may behave in uncharacteristic ways.

I no longer take part in the office secret Santa. One year I was totally missed as recipient but had bought. Following year got cocktail syrups. I'm diabetic and don't drink. I'm not a b**ch, not nasty in any way. It really upset me and does to this day. And I love Christmas,

Bloody hell @Bobblemymind I teared up thinking of you, what a vicious, evil, pathetic and many many other such words person. Absolutely bereft of any human thought or emotion. I Absolutely hope your manager investigated this and they were disciplined. Am so angry for you.

This always gets me on here. You get some appalling behaviour from adults, pulling shit like this, howling and mocking at peoples names choices over in baby names, slagging off peoples style over on the style and beauty boards…. It’s no wonder kids get bullied “for anything” when this is how their parents react.

You need to give your head a wobble for thinking in this manner. If you can’t be nice and buy as you would for anyone else withdraw from the SS as a giver and recipient. What you are proposing is bullying behaviour and is shameful.

I love this.

Am I the only person who find office SS absolutely cringe? I'd hate to have this.

They do SS at one of my dc's extra curricular activity. Some families either forget or don't put any effort in, it's so naff.

They are getting a 'better service' if you had a patient who, for whatever reason, was not very nice you treated them with more respect and kindness above the normal levels of courtesy.

so they are abusive and rude, but get more respect and kindness in return? Does that work or does that just ramp up the 'not very niceness?' From my experience it does the latter.