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Original poster

DP left with my bank card, no response. I'm worried and can't sleep.

203 replies

Awakestill1 · 15/10/2022 01:48

Disclaimer, there has been infidelity in the past which I found out about after he left in the middle of a night and sent me a text for me to wake up to.. so admittedly I'm super anxious at any sign of anything being amiss.

He works nights and always texts me on his break at 12.15. Tonight he asked if he could borrow my bank card to get himself something to eat on his break as he doesnt get paid until next week, no problem.

I remembered we need nappies so I text him at 11ish asking him to pick some up on his way home in the morning. No reply. Unusual for him.

His break comes and goes, radio silence. I thought perhaps his phone had died but it rings when I call (it wouldn't get him into trouble, he has it on silent at work anyway)

I'm flitting between thinking he's had an accident to then thinking he has done a bunk again. I'm royally screwed without my bank card.

Is anybody around to talk to me? Please be kind, I have PND and I'm a little fragile atm.

OP posts:
FiveShelties · 16/10/2022 21:40

TinaWeymouthsBass · 15/10/2022 17:41

If you can't trust your DH with your PIN then he really shouldn't be your DH!

Absolutely, if I cannot trust my husband with money then I cannot trust him in anything.

MightyOaks · 17/10/2022 23:57

HoppingPavlova · 16/10/2022 13:32

That's actually quite sad. I can’t imagine being married to someone and going days without speaking for any reason whatsoever. Before my husband died, we were very close but still managed to each have our independence & freedom. We enjoyed speaking to each other and had a wonderful connection.

I didn’t say I don’t enjoy talking to him! Or my (now adult) children. Just that we don’t NEED to if on a work trip which are generally completely full on and if there was a call it would be done while flying in a hotel room door from a conference, chucking another set of clothes on, touching up face etc and flying out door again to all troop on a bus. Always a bus so it’s not a place close by walking distance and people can’t leave early when dinner is finished but must chat/mingle until time for bus to return to hotel, or we’d obviously all piss off once last bite was had. Or, the reason you are on the work trip is new procedures etc where you can be tied up for well over a working day in an environment where you can’t take a phone call let alone leisurely chit chat phone call, throw in time difference and unless you want to wake your partner/kids at 4am in the morning for a 90 second call taken while you are wee’ing in order to fit it in, it’s a no go.

I used to work long shifts and often over 72hrs straight while kids were young and didn’t even have time to finish a bag of chips from a vending machine for a meal break let alone call home to chat with DH/kids. I really thank goodness my DH didn’t/doesn’t have the same definition of ‘sad’ as you do in this regard and he had a genuine respect that I was in a situation where it just wasn’t possible and it certainly wasn’t a measure of enjoying each other and connection.

All I'm saying is that our bond was closer than that 🤷🏼‍♀️

UserError012345 · 18/10/2022 05:40

Nah, I'd never trust anyone with my PIN regardless of the 'bond'.

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