Ryan Giggs: bad man, nice handbag?

[badmanbag]

Doesn’t really go with the suit though.

👀 😂

Shit I thought you were taking the piss about egg in my sandwich

Wow. Just, wow.

Someone is going to release a line of t-shirts.

I was! Did he actually say that?!?

I think if we can take anything from this trial, it’s ‘never attempt poetry while wanking.’

The Welsh have poetry in their souls. They have the Eisteddfod every year and a Chief Bard is awarded the title by the Archdruid to celebrate the height of Welsh poetic achievement. Too late this year, Ryan, but next year, who knows? Get your mum to fill in the application form. Long words acceptable.

If there were ever a time for a super injunction …

Yep.

Can you imagine being the judge?

("thinksboutsadthingsthinkaboutsadthingsthinkaboutsadthings")

😂

I know nobody around here would read the DM 😉 - but they’re loving the poetry too.

"G is for gorgeous,
"R is for radiant,
"E is for extraordinary,
"V is for vivacious,
"I is for idolised, by me,
"L is for legs,
"L is for legs,
"E is for everything I've ever wanted."

‘L is for legs
L is for legs’

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

The Telegraph may have misquoted him of course. " Doughnut" has a gravitas that "donut" lacks. It elevates.

'Totem pole' asdjafjafsfsfs. Magical. I doubt Byron could write better.

This is my favourite thread of the year. I hope the poetry never ends 😂😂😂😂

She used homophones. He used his own spelling.

I'm laughing like a loon at "L is for legs L is for legs"

How many legs has she actually got?

’L is for leg
L is for leg’

would have been more accurate, no?

...which is a lot...

What a cock he is 😂

From the Daily Mail for those with more shame than me

'Lawyers in the case had initially read out by saying 'kiss, kiss' at the end of each text. However Judge Hilary Manley eventually intervened, saying: 'Sorry to interrupt but we probably don't need the kiss, kiss, kiss'.

The barristers, who are acting as Giggs and Ms Greville as they read out the exchanges, laughed and both agreed.

Judge Manley also intervened when one of the lawyers began reading out a message from Ms Greville to Giggs, which read: 'I love, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.'

Judge Manley said: 'I think "I love you repeated" would do.' She said: 'We need to keep the gravity of this situation.'

😂😂😂

From the Class of '92
Set pitches ablaze with passes sublime,
Yet now old Giggsy's battling through
A court case for a nasty crime.
Once bold and fearless on the wing,
Now sits defiant in the dock
With all the court a-tittering
At awful poems about his cock.

Just shows how many desperate women there are out there.

That poem is perfection. I've been looking for the second reading for our wedding (😆)

God their declarations really are toe-curlingly awful.

His poor kids reading their pathetic smut.I really wonder what ex-Mrs Giggs (who had these two shagging about behind her back) thinks? Definitely, well rid!

I did jury service last year and saw the judge in this case in the corridor a few times as we had to queue outside her office on the way into court (she wasn't the judge on the case I was on). She's a very elegant woman. The poetry is laughable. The alleged offences are not.