I think we should have an MN village show

[anotherneutralname]

What should the categories be?

Clearly we will need:

• most unusual object covered in glitter
• sculpture entirely from Waitrose recycling
• best artisan scotch egg (ahem)

What else? And what will you be entering?

Feel free to nominate yourself as a judge but we will need to see your credentials...

Best hedgehog cake

Best pet. Mine will win.

I am happy to judge anything. I am very judgemental.

Best punched cake.

Most realistic bat. 🦇

I think we will need LOTS of cake categories.

Hedgehog cakes - of course
Punched cake - extra judging needed
Lemon drizzle - no question

Most meals made out of a whole chicken.

Naicest ham.

I feel like we could have a live element of people competing to cook as many meals from one chicken as possible within say, twenty minutes? Ready steady batch cook?

Most amusingly shaped vegetable. Nothing like a rude turnip or two to make me cackle 😁

We'll need a parking attendant.

The best white trainer owner.

We need a coconut shy of course and I can bring my carrot cake for judging (I did win first place at our village show with the recipe).

-MIL from hell category

@Taytocrisps

We'll need a parking attendant.

Just ONE? They will need a committee of their own just to decide the rota for the high vis jacket.

@SavoyCabbage

Best punched cake.

Most realistic bat. 🦇

Best punched cake?! What does that mean? Is it a euphemism?

Most impressive massive salad!

@MrsPnut

We need a coconut shy of course and I can bring my carrot cake for judging (I did win first place at our village show with the recipe).

You should be one of the carrot cake judges then, that should make things exciting. Nothing like some healthy "debate" over the winners.

Why is it called PUNCH, anyway???

Dog show - for the most unruly dog.

@LadyGardenersQuestionTime

We can be the judging panel.

A "guess my age" competition

If we're having unruly dogs we'd better have a sausage sizzle.

YES to guess my age.

Children's category - most unusual shaped item you can find in your parents' bedroom home

@MissyB1

Dog show - for the most unruly dog.

That's my two winning something.

Although if there is a barky dickhead category then they'd win that too.

We will need many sub-committees that can bicker and compete for Best Martyr in Show.

The vicars wife will need to be asked if only to elbow the Lady Mayor out of the ribbon cutting picture.

Cutest baby completion.

May Queen

And a fucktonne of bunting

Cake punching extravaganza

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1718384-To-pelt-my-cakes-at-this-mums-head-in-the-playground-this-afternoon-fume