There is half a carrot in my husbands toilet

[HoneyDragon]

and I don’t why and no one is confessing to putting it there.

The likely culprits all have alibis thus far….

Dh has pointed out he doesn’t like carrots
Dd never goes in there because “ew boys”
The dog hasn’t got the mental capacity to open the fridge door, salad drawer, shut the fridge, not eat the carrot and take it upstairs to put in the toilet.
Ds is at work so yet to respond but that seems like more effort than he’d be willing to invest.

I am perplexed.

Do vegetables spontaneously erupt from ubends? I thought that was just reserved for venomous critters and alligators.

@Saisong

I would like to know if your husband also cleans this exclusive toilet

(I hate cleaning manky boy toilets)

Same! No way would I be cleaning a toilet I don't even use!

@Purplewithred

I am now really . I cannot reconcile you and DH having your own bedrooms and bathrooms (like Our Own Dear Queen) with you emptying your own bins. Please explain.

My dad had his own loo, but it was in the outhouse and was absolutely revolting. And freezing. If we were caught short we talked about having to use dad's back passage, which we thought was hysterical.

Why is this such a difficult thing to comprehend?

We have an en suite which is mine then we have a family bathroom which dh and the kids use. Therefore his bathroom. Downstairs is another loo which everyone except ds1 and dd use.

Maybe the snowman needed the loo, but the heating was too high...?

Of course this is a honeydragon thread you get all the fun! The most exciting thing in my toilets is loo roll covered in shit and a 6 year old exclaiming he cleaned the loo. He hadn't. He'd just smeared shit everywhere.

Im listening to some Agatha Christie short stories and would just like to mention the possibility of -
Long lost half sibling
An estate dispute
It is your dog DH ds and Dd all acting together to make you start to doubt yourself
An ancient relic from a Mesopotamian cult which is actually some sort of blow pipe flushed (unsuccessfully) after use. Have you seen your neighbours today ?!
And so on.
May seem unlikely but AC didn’t seem to think so - very often

Is it definitely not a poo?

It must have fallen out of his bottom.

We have our own toilets too for those weirded out by it.

aaaaaaaand it was ds. Who decided that he didn’t want it and wanted to clean his teeth. Two birds one stone.

He’s a fucking adult, who figured it was biodegradable so would be fine. 4 fucking a-levels and an engineering scholarship and it transpires I’ve raised an absolute bloody idiot.

@Whatwouldscullydo

There is one other explanation

Based on your username.....Aliens?

@HoneyDragon

aaaaaaaand it was ds. Who decided that he didn’t want it and wanted to clean his teeth. Two birds one stone.

He’s a fucking adult, who figured it was biodegradable so would be fine. 4 fucking a-levels and an engineering scholarship and it transpires I’ve raised an absolute bloody idiot.

4 fucking a-levels and an engineering scholarship and it transpires I’ve raised an absolute bloody idiot.

Thats males for you

So who fished it out?

[quote Couchbettato]@TinnedPotatoesRock

You learn something new every day![/quote]
I freeze them first too

Not to toot my own horn, but I did suggest a poltergeist or Ds in my first post.

The teenage brain is not fully developed and this can lead to dodgy decision making.

Ds is denying sexual relations with the carrot.

@CherryMaple

Your husband has his own toilet?

My thoughts exactly..

I'll just leave this here.....
https://www.amazon.co.uk/review/R3GDDEL1SC1QQ5

You're welcome!

@ActonBell

When you say your husband’s toilet - do you live separately or does he have his own designated toilet?! Sorry - I know this doesn’t help with the carrot thing but I’m intrigued.

Yep.

@KingVoid

What MI5 why would they want a phone that’s just well strange

You're right. MI5 would never confiscate your phone, that would be very strange.

It's MI6, the thieving bastards.

Zombie snowman entered the house in the night and then melted?

Genius

Weirdest thing I’ve ever read on mn so far! 😂
WHY did your son put it down the toilet?? I don’t get it! 😂

@KingVoid
Maybe don't hijack peoples threads?

sunshinecake I was going to but dh insisted I leave the crime scene untouched. Possible because I was yelling at him for shoving root vegetables down his toilet. He fished it out.

@HoneyDragon
That's hilarious, I envision my children doing this when they grow up🤣

I was suspecting the family of donkeys who have moved in next door.

4 fucking a-levels and an engineering scholarship and it transpires I’ve raised an absolute bloody idiot.

But ... BUT! WAS it really DS? Or is he taking a fall? Because - straight from the evidence room - I submit - seems like more effort than he’d be willing to invest ...?

(cue Doom Music)