Turns out, nothing bad happens if...

[HangingOver]

When I arrived into my thirties, like a lot of women I know, I experienced a dip in the amount of energy I found I had to allocate to fucks being given

Since then, I've noticed a number of Eureka moments when Ive realised, "turns out, nothing bad happens if..." and they are for the most part, joyful.

Here are a few of my favourites (personal to me, obviously, I'm sure people in other circs will disagree):

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't iron.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't mow your lawn (literally or figuratively).

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't wear a padded bra (because I spent my twenties sadly trying to enhance my non-existent norks because "men would notice").

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you wash your hair with shower gel.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't do a patch test 24 hours before colouring.

HBU?

Ooh, I could have written this post. And the older I get, my 'nothing bad will happen' list gets a bit longer.

Nothing bad happened when I ate a raw chicken dipper (I thought it was a cold cooked one)

Nothing bad happens and No one cares what you look like on the beach in your bikini (expect you)

Nothing bad happens and No one cares what you look like anyway. Full stop.

Nothing bad happens when you breastfeed a toddler in public

Nothing bad happens if you don’t shave your legs

Nothing bad happens if you text back immediately

Sorry, that would read ‘don’t’ text back immediately

I'd advise the patch test recklessness.

But in general, yes!

Nothing bad happens if you:

• Only fake-tan the bits that show;
• Stop reading bad books before the end;
• Ask for one-shot of coffee rather than two;
• Give up wine;
• Don't make your own jam from loving foraged blackberries every autumn.

Bad stuff DOES happen, though, when you:

• Buy clippers and try to cut your kids' hair to save money;
• Use margarine instead of butter for biscuits;
• Drink 5 cans of G&T at a party when you're nervous;
• Don't send thank-you letters;
• Don't set reminders to cancel trial subscriptions;
• Don't get dressed early in the morning.

set reminders to cancel trial subscriptions

This. A lot.

Nothing bad happens when you say “no, sorry that doesn’t work for me” without tacking on an excuse or a justification. I particularly enjoy using it at work when some man person has inexplicably decided I am the ideal candidate to wipe their backside and deal with something they ought to sort themselves.

Nothing bad happens if you run the dishwasher half full.

I've taken to running every night, no matter how little is in it (admittedly, with four of us, it's generally mostly full!), and it has made a huge difference to how clean my kitchen is.

Wait until you get to your fifties, you're in for a real treat. You can be your authentic self. If something bothers you, you can point it out or decline. You don't have to go to boring things because it will upset someone. You can dress how you want and not give a fig what others think. You can decide not to eat stuff that you always thought you should. You can choose not to see people who annoy you. You can do hobbies and stuff for you, not all the people you've been looking after all those years. Yippee!

Nothing bad happens if I don’t change the bedsheets/covers for a week or even two

Dacquoise sounds brilliant

I’m getting there on my late 40’s now and certainly don’t care what others think so much which is so liberating. I was always concerned with upsetting or letting down others

I agree with all except the patch test. I've seen a few women in A&E because they have had reactions to hair dye (despite it being the same one they always use). Sometimes horrifically unwell.

I suddenly developed a bad allergy to hair dye, you really should do a patch test.

Apart from I agree with you!

I am 50 and I certainly don’t care.
And I only ever ironed the kids school shirts, but I do answer texts straight away. I just think it’s manners to do it if you can.

Agree with eeyore about the patch test! Nothing bad has happened…yet!

Also I don’t get the one about not getting dressed Albert??

For me it’s nothing bad happens if you say no to parties/nights out/zooms (during pandemic) or end up having to cancel or bow out.

Also I don’t get the one about not getting dressed Albert??

I'm freelance and WFH most days. I know that I HAVE to get showered and dressed as soon as I get up. Otherwise... we'll, otherwise it gets to [checks clock] 10:52am and I'll still be in my fluffy dressing gown, farting round on Mumsnet.

I would end up looking like a scarecrow with straw hair if I washed my hair with shower gel and i know this from experience!

but....nothing bad happens if you stop going to the hairdresser and trim your own hair including fringe

@OhWhyNot, yep it's great. I actually iron my bed linen because I love the feel of fresh crisp sheets. Anal I know, but I just don't care!

Nothing bad happens if you don't shave your legs.
Nothing bad happens if you don't wear a bra.
Nothing bad happens if you don't wear make up.
Nothing bad happens if you prefer staying in.
I love getting older.

Nothing bad happens

• if you don't dust regularly
• if you don't Hoover every day
• if you spend an entire day off watching Netflix
• if you don't "put away your summer clothes" in September
• if you let your teenagers lie in bed until lunchtime at weekends

I don't understand the patch test. misses point of thread

It says it's important to do because you can develop an allergy at any point despite having previously used it before. Understood. But surely you could develop it in the 48hrs between the test and application?

@AlbertBridge

I'd advise the patch test recklessness.

But in general, yes!

Nothing bad happens if you:

• Only fake-tan the bits that show;
• Stop reading bad books before the end;
• Ask for one-shot of coffee rather than two;
• Give up wine;
• Don't make your own jam from loving foraged blackberries every autumn.

Bad stuff DOES happen, though, when you:

• Buy clippers and try to cut your kids' hair to save money;
• Use margarine instead of butter for biscuits;
• Drink 5 cans of G&T at a party when you're nervous;
• Don't send thank-you letters;
• Don't set reminders to cancel trial subscriptions;
• Don't get dressed early in the morning.

Re: patch test. Did you know that if you're going to have an anaphylactic reaction to sometime, it's more pronounced after the second exposure? So the patch test - while a way for the company to cover their backs - would like make any reaction worse anyway.

@HangingOver

When I arrived into my thirties, like a lot of women I know, I experienced a dip in the amount of energy I found I had to allocate to fucks being given

Since then, I've noticed a number of Eureka moments when Ive realised, "turns out, nothing bad happens if..." and they are for the most part, joyful.

Here are a few of my favourites (personal to me, obviously, I'm sure people in other circs will disagree):

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't iron.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't mow your lawn (literally or figuratively).

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't wear a padded bra (because I spent my twenties sadly trying to enhance my non-existent norks because "men would notice").

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you wash your hair with shower gel.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't do a patch test 24 hours before colouring.

HBU?

Except most of that's not true, plenty bad things can happen. If don't patch test and are allergic, you can have serious and painful problems. If you don't iron, you might look very messy, this may prevent you getting a promotion or new job or a date or whatever.

I mean, you dob't have to give any fucks about the bad things, but they don't cease to exist because you don't care anymore.

Early on in life I decided I couldn’t be bothered with ironing anything and I stick to that (I tend to wear jersey skirts and tops anyway so no need). Who cares if me or DD look a little crumpled?

I also only sporadically shave my legs and nothing’s happened yet 😂

Here my 2 biggest, they may be offensive or may be contentious or hard to hear or someone might want to call me bad names and tell me to go away... You have been warned... Ready...

Nothing bad happens when you realise, often the person putting the most pressure on you... Is you...

Nothing bad happens when you realise 'the perfect....(holiday / Christmas / Sunday dinner / wedding) is all a myth, just relax and have fun, then it will be perfect.

Oohh, I have found my people. NBH if ...

• run the dishwasher overnight half full, don't empty it first thing the next morning and (someone else) starts loading dirty stuff in the next day.

• show up to a zoom call with no makeup and hair scrapped back. It works in real life too but I'm more likely to make some effort in RL.