Turns out, nothing bad happens if...

[HangingOver]

When I arrived into my thirties, like a lot of women I know, I experienced a dip in the amount of energy I found I had to allocate to fucks being given

Since then, I've noticed a number of Eureka moments when Ive realised, "turns out, nothing bad happens if..." and they are for the most part, joyful.

Here are a few of my favourites (personal to me, obviously, I'm sure people in other circs will disagree):

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't iron.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't mow your lawn (literally or figuratively).

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't wear a padded bra (because I spent my twenties sadly trying to enhance my non-existent norks because "men would notice").

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you wash your hair with shower gel.

Turns out, nothing bad happens if you don't do a patch test 24 hours before colouring.

HBU?

@PalmarisLongus

I read that as nothing bad happens if you eat kids sweets.😂

[quote Bargebill19]@PalmarisLongus

I read that as nothing bad happens if you eat kids sweets.😂[/quote]
TBF, if you eat kids sweets, nothing bad will happen... Unless they've got a big scary dad that might thump ya..

Buy your own kids sweets, all is good... I may have a weakness for midget gems and strawberry laces...

@PalmarisLongus

I’m a haribo fiend. Maybe malteasers as well.

@ManifestDestinee

And don;t say no promotion because that is irrelevant to my context

But it's not irrelevant to other peoples context. You may have the freedm to not care what people think of you, most people do not. Most people haev jobs where they have to look as they are told.
There's a level of privilege in these posts about not caring about not showering or ironing or cleaning or cooking for your kids or caring about birthdays...but for some people that means losing your job and possible social services involvement.
And most of it is sheer pretence anyway.

But it is crap.

I am a professional, and even when working in the work place I rarely ironed.

People always say 'I can tell if you haven't ironed you clothes' but you CAN'T unless you ask every single person that you meet if they ironed their clothes.

person A - very dishevelled, crumpled clothes, looks a mess. Not professional, yes this is going to effect how they are seen in their job.

person B - trousers with knife cutting crease down the front and full face of make up. Yes this person has irond their clothes and is well presented. But unless they are good at their job, it isn;t going to help.

person C - and this is most of us, clothes that you CANNOT tell if they are ironed or not. eg Jersey skirt, soft woolen top with pretty scarf. Nothing needs ironing due to the fabrics. In fact if you ironed them, they would look shiny and not as good. Person looks well presented, and professional.

And the same goes for eveyrthing else.
When I commuted, I had to shower every day. When I worked close to home, I didn't especially in winter. I didn't smell. Same thing applies
person A - stinks, obviously needs a shower
person B - smells overwhelmingly of shower gel every morning
person C - just well, is. UNless you ask you won't know how often they shower. Many many people do not need to shower every day.

And cleaning. My house is clean enough. It is not spotless, and not perfect, but it is not going to attract social services, and NBH if I don't hoover every day. People are reacting against the idea that you house must look like a show home. Not true.

Good enough is my favourite phrase when comes to parenting, cleaning, clothes, well, life really.

@steppemum

You mention commuting, this is important imo.

If someone religiously irons their work clothes, showers first thing, does hair and make up. Then has to commute... Doesn't that pretty much undo all of the 'work' they've put in to go to work?

I had to get the bus to an office job for a while. I'd get to the office crumpled from being jostled on the bus, sweaty from the heat of the bus, hair everywhere from the wind etc.

Nbh if you remember ironing may get rid of creases, but it doesn't mean they'll stay crease free for more than 10 minutes.

PalmarisLongus

yes!

I used to iron ds school shirts, as he had 100% cotton ones, not the easy care ones.
Then I watched him.

Newly ironed shirt on.
roll up sleeves.
mangle collar to look cool round the tie
add blazer
cycle and train to school.

Before he left the house the shirt no longer looked ironed. I realised they kept balzers on all day.

So, as long as the button bit (which was the only bit you could see) wasn't crumpled, I didn't iron them. Hang them on a hanger and ran my fingers downt he button bit to smooth it. Sorted.

ds (who cares A LOT about how he looks) didn't even notice.

Ive been reading all these and Im finding in 90% of the things you've all got away with - something bad HAS happened to me. Ive managed to get away with not ironing anything (well no ones ever said anything to me!) but apart from that I think Ive been caught out by nearly everything else - eg if I dont get up and dressed and put my face on I can GUARANTEE I will get a surprise visit from someone. Same with the gardening/mowing the lawn - I kept putting it off, then someone asked my next door neighbour if my house was unoccupied/abandoned! And the re-heated rice that someone coped ok with - I got food poisoning so bad I thought I was dying!

@Untrained

Your post makes me sad

You say:
"something bad HAS happened to me."

And then:
"if I dont get up and dressed and put my face on I can GUARANTEE I will get a surprise visit from someone."
Why is it in your mind it is BAD that someone sees your face without make up? What happened exactly that is bad? Where has this pressure you apply to yourself come from that makes you feel bad if you don't spend money to falsify your looks?
Do men answer doors on days off without make up and feel horrified at the thought?

"Same with the gardening/mowing the lawn - I kept putting it off, then someone asked my next door neighbour if my house was unoccupied/abandoned!"

And? How is that bad? Again, applying pressure to yourself in fear of other people's opinions. Tell them to go fuck themselves. Why do you care what some chuckle fuck you don't know thinks of your garden? Unless it's part of a contract like a tenancy, your garden is your garden, do what you want with it and damn what people think.

"And the re-heated rice that someone coped ok with - I got food poisoning so bad I thought I was dying!"

This is the only actual bad thing you listed.
Getting ill is a something...
People seeing your face isn't bad..
and you can't control other people's thoughts, so what strangers may or may not think should be none of your concern.

PalmarisLongus

“Chuckle fuck” is the best thing ever and nbh will happen if I use it in every sentence I say in future including to children and at work. I love you a bit.

@PalmarisLongus. Dont be sad! My post was meant to be lighthearted. (Although I do still think someone seeing my un-made up face is bad - I don't like frightening people ). I appreciate your concern though and I will try to worry less what others think, and if I may, Id also like to use 'chuckle fuck' in future!

@MrsWooster and @Untrained

I love Chuckle Fuck.