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Original poster

Come and play my made-up game

978 replies

UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa · 13/08/2021 20:44

I will ask for advice, and you have to answer using only a quote from somewhere else on Mumsnet. Then you can ask for the next piece of advice. (best to quote the advice question you're answering in case there's cross-posting)

Okay, first question: What should I wear to my cousin's wedding?

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 31/01/2023 20:33

What's the best thing about owning a pet?

Find these threads very divisive and depressing.

Clearly some people are not feeling the cost of living crisis at all.

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What's the most useful thing you've bought so far this year?

35andThriving · 31/01/2023 21:00

What's the most useful thing you've bought so far this year?

a stuffed bear.
Not a teddy, your actual full sized, dead taxidermied job.

My other half has never met my parents before. I want him to make a good impression. Does anyone have any advice / tips?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 31/01/2023 22:08

My other half has never met my parents before. I want him to make a good impression. Does anyone have any advice / tips?

Stop them eating play dough, stop them eating the cats tail, attempt a 'walk', stop then chasing the random cats tail on the walk, bribe them with the promise of a snack if we can move off the driveway on our 'walk', turn around after our 20 minute non walk. Show them the clock says 8am and we've been up 3 hours. Snack time. Clear up the dropped snack. Convince them we've had enough snack. It's continues....

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I fancy my next door neighbour! How can I get us talking without making it obvious I'm on the pull?

Original poster
UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa · 01/02/2023 11:23

I fancy my next door neighbour! How can I get us talking without making it obvious I'm on the pull?

A banner in the window of the shop

My friend interviewed for a dream job but didn't get it. What went wrong?

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 01/02/2023 18:25

My friend interviewed for a dream job but didn't get it. What went wrong?

YABU. Both DH and I have PG degrees and are lucky enough to make very good (him) and good (me) money doing what we wish. Thanks partly to inheritance we are distinctly UMC financially. My father is a successful businessman, my mother a housewife. DH’s father was at the pinnacle of the academic/scientific establishment and his mother was a teacher and an activist.

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Only a couple of weeks to Valentine's Day! What are you buying for that special someone?

35andThriving · 01/02/2023 18:36

Only a couple of weeks to Valentine's Day! What are you buying for that special someone?

an ancient collection of body parts preserved in formaldehyde in large glass jars!

Do you have any unusual hobbies?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 01/02/2023 18:56

Do you have any unusual hobbies?

vomiting, pooing, farting and splattering the bathroom from both ends.

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Recommend me a romantic destination for my upcoming honeymoon.

Original poster
UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa · 01/02/2023 22:04

Recommend me a romantic destination for my upcoming honeymoon.

go to 6 petrol stations

My mother has a milestone birthday coming up. What is she secretly hoping for?

OP posts:
Smartstuffed · 01/02/2023 22:30

'My mother has a milestone birthday coming up. What is she secretly hoping for?'

Hollandaise sauce!

My brother is a scheming arse - can you suggest a suitable comeuppance?

Original poster
UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa · 02/02/2023 06:24

My brother is a scheming arse - can you suggest a suitable comeuppance?

send him to a much smaller, private school which is far less academic

What's at the top of your To-Do list today?

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 02/02/2023 19:30

What's at the top of your To-Do list today?

pulling our own teeth out and living on turnips whilst the rich folks demand we hand over any produce we've grown and taking our daughters off us.

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I'm hiring a new nanny for my DC aged 2 and 4 - what sort of things should I ask in the interviews?

35andThriving · 02/02/2023 20:43

What's at the top of your To-Do list today?

I really must shave my legs and pits and tidy my lady garden. I really must. DH is calling me 'fluffy'.

What should I spend the Child Benefit on, this month?

35andThriving · 02/02/2023 20:58

I'm hiring a new nanny for my DC aged 2 and 4 - what sort of things should I ask in the interviews?

would you be happy if your local school had wild boar or wolves running around the playground?

What should I spend the Child Benefit on this month?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 03/02/2023 12:51

What shall I spend the Child Benefit on this month?

one of those touch and spray air fresheners you find in shit pub toilets.

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What do you miss most about your life as a teenager?

35andThriving · 03/02/2023 14:57

What do you miss most about your life as a teenager?

Sitting under a bridge, combing my toenails ...

Can you guess what my favourite part of this week has been?

BruceAndNosh · 03/02/2023 15:01

Can you guess what my favourite part of this week has been?
You'd have to put a helmet on toddlers 🪖

Q - Why does my boss do this?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 03/02/2023 16:14

Q - Why does my boss do this?

I would leave the room if necessary. Are you able to wear something she can’t easily grab hold of?

Are you praising good behaviour so she knows the difference between right and wrong?

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Lately, my husband has been spending hours on his phone - what do you think he's up to?

BruceAndNosh · 03/02/2023 17:05

Lately, my husband has been spending hours on his phone - what do you think he's up to?
blown donated money on Drink, tramadol and Cotswolds sideboards

Q- is it my job to buy presents for MIL?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 03/02/2023 17:45

Q - Is it my job to buy presents for MIL?

I'm sorry to hear you have too much money you need rid of, but wouldn't it make more sense to donate to perhaps a homeless charity

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What can I use my brand new Air-Fryer for?

Original poster
UnlimitedChipsAndSalsa · 03/02/2023 19:58

What can I use my brand new Air-Fryer for?

Not the usual things like kittens and hot chocolate. Just random things.

How can I make new friends?

OP posts:
BruceAndNosh · 03/02/2023 20:04

The last couple of answers have been marvellous!

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 03/02/2023 21:04

How can I make new friends?

You kind of want a "seriousness suit" that you could just chuck over your head at the start of the day - grey wig, thick specs, suit and Big Fuckoff Brooch (like Lady Hale), Duchess Of Something shoes.

How can I stop my FIL dominating the conversation all the time?

QueenOfThorns · 03/02/2023 22:03

How can I stop my FIL dominating the conversation all the time?

Stand up, adjust yourself, sit down again, shoving/clonking his knee with your bag/coat/umbrella/book, and step slightly on his foot

QueenOfThorns · 03/02/2023 22:04

Sorry, I forgot to post a question!

Why is my cat such a dickhead?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 03/02/2023 23:17

Why is my cat such a dickhead?

To answer your question OP it will require a fundamental restructuring of society.

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What could be making my car smell funny?