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The OW is miserable with him

342 replies

BadgerHair · 28/05/2021 18:43

Split with ex about 6 years ago. I found out he had cheated for the 2nd time (2nd time that I knew about, there could have been more). The end of my relationship and his new relationship overlapped by 3 months. He is still with the OW.

3 months later I met my lovely DP, kind of recycled as we went out with each other at school. We are still together.

Friend met OW through a hobby. Friend assumed OW knew who she was but was just keeping quiet for the sake of peace in the group. However, it appears that OW hasn't clicked that her new hobby friend is a long standing friend of mine. OW has been confiding in friend - her partner / my ex cheats. He also compares her unfavourably to me all the time. Her appearance, career, cooking (and I'm a shit cook), everything. He also tells her that he could get back with me if he wanted to 😂😂😂. No chance of that, he's a dick.

Normally I'd feel sorry for a woman in this situation. But I see her as equally responsible as him for what happened - my life was suddenly turned upside down, I had to move house, was suddenly single, went on a holiday booked for me and ex by myself. It worked out well for me in the end but initially it was turmoil. I feel her actions caused her own misery.

Just wanted to vent 😃.

OP posts:
Sparklfairy · 28/05/2021 18:46

That's mean OP. Surely if hes such an abusive bullying cheat you knew this would happen.

I'm in the same situation but she hasn't realised what a cunt he is yet, and frankly I feel pity, and a little worried for her.

Yellowhighheels · 28/05/2021 18:46

You've no need to feel sorry for her. She knows what hes like and knows where the door is. It's her actions in sticking around now that are causing her misery, not what went before. You're well out of it with him, sounds like a prize knobhead

Custardo · 28/05/2021 18:46

personally my vengeance would be directed at my ex. he's the shit - not her. i would fuck him over - shes got nowt to do with it

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ReginaTheEvilQueen · 28/05/2021 18:46

Have they hd kids? Them i would feel sorry for having a dick like that for a father and living in that atmosphere, but her?? No way would i feel sorry for her, ive been in your situation, and when i hear that they are having problems i dont feel sorry for the OW one bit!

RunningFromInsanity · 28/05/2021 18:48

That is what they call Karma.

Once a cheat, always a cheat.

All you can hope is that she finds the peace you have.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 28/05/2021 18:48

You think she deserves to be abused? Hmm

redpeppersoup · 28/05/2021 18:49

I don’t think it’s mean at all, it’s not like she’s messaging the OW to gloat! I would feel the same, and assuming the OW has agency to leave him wouldn’t be feeling too sorry for her...

Flowerclock · 28/05/2021 18:49

Oh dear that's a shame

OrchidLass · 28/05/2021 18:51

I don't think anyone deserves this from anyone. Nice for her when she finds out her new friend is reporting back to you.

Clearly she was out of order if she knew your ex was married, no question about that, but I wouldn't wish someone a miserable life.

BadgerHair · 28/05/2021 18:54

I'm not doing anything to her.

She chose him, knowing he was in a long term relationship with someone else, and went for it anyway. She got what she wanted - a relationship with him.

OP posts:
BadgerHair · 28/05/2021 18:55

@OrchidLass

I don't think anyone deserves this from anyone. Nice for her when she finds out her new friend is reporting back to you.

Clearly she was out of order if she knew your ex was married, no question about that, but I wouldn't wish someone a miserable life.

I'm not wishing anyone a miserable life. She chose her path.
OP posts:
drpet49 · 28/05/2021 18:58

* I feel her actions caused her own misery.*

^Completely agree. She’s got her karma.

Northernsoullover · 28/05/2021 18:58

Ignore the self righteous here. I'd feel happy about this too.

Sensateria · 28/05/2021 18:59

Her actions, and now her inaction, is causing her own misery. She knew what she was getting into. She knew he was a cheat. She went into it with her eyes wide open.

BadgerHair · 28/05/2021 18:59

@Custardo

personally my vengeance would be directed at my ex. he's the shit - not her. i would fuck him over - shes got nowt to do with it
I'm not going to fuck anyone over. I barely think about them these days. It's just kind of satisfying knowing that they aren't happy, given what they BOTH did to me. She is equally as guilty as him, as she got involved with a man who already had a partner - she could have walked away then.
OP posts:
donquixotedelamancha · 28/05/2021 19:00

That's mean OP.

Meh, OP is doing absolutely nothing mean.
This woman has wronged her and expressed no regret or apology. I think a little schadenfreude is human.

WinterSunglasses · 28/05/2021 19:03

@Northernsoullover

Ignore the self righteous here. I'd feel happy about this too.
Agreed, she didn't have to take up with him.

Who would expect a man to feel sorry and worried for the man who his ex-wife cheated on him with, and is now having a bad time? This ridiculous level of saintliness is another stupid expectation to pile onto women and it can feck right off.

Nomorepies · 28/05/2021 19:04

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on the poster's request

OccaChocca · 28/05/2021 19:05

It's kind of reassuring to know that nothing has changed. Sounds like they deserve each other.

GlitterBombing · 28/05/2021 19:06

my life was suddenly turned upside down, I had to move house, was suddenly single, went on a holiday booked for me and ex by myself. It worked out well for me in the end but initially it was turmoil.

The OW was partially responsible for the shock, hurt and turmoil in OP's life. Why should OP give two hoots about the OW's miserable life.

Sakura7 · 28/05/2021 19:12

Ignore the self righteous crew OP, you're not being mean at all. Totally natural to feel how you do, after what the pair of them put you through.

It's karma Smile

Sakura7 · 28/05/2021 19:14

This ridiculous level of saintliness is another stupid expectation to pile onto women and it can feck right off.

Hear hear!

Potteringshed · 28/05/2021 19:15

I wouldn't trust the friend who is feeding all this back to you. If she's willing to be utterly dishonest/a fake friend to the OW, she clearly capable of betraying your trust too. It's actu a pretty shit thing to do - listen to someone talking about their very painful situation and then go and laugh behind their back about it.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 28/05/2021 19:18

Once a cheat, always a cheat. You reap what you sow.

Ohmygodyesthatsit · 28/05/2021 19:20

@Potteringshed totally agree vile behaviour of friend.

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