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Neighbour unhappy DD gave his DS a snack

555 replies

Eastie77 · 03/04/2021 13:12

I am really annoyed but know I may be over-reacting so need to be talked down.

DD was playing out with our neighbours DS, he is about 10. At one point she ran into the kitchen and quickly out again. It turns out she took a bag of crisps and shared them with him and other kids. She knows she is not allowed to do this but it all happened v quickly. Neighbour later sent me a message "just a quick one Eastie, DS is not allowed snacks between meals" and went on to say he hadn't eaten his lunch because of the crisps. I explained I understood although I hadn't given them to his DS. He responded by saying that's fine but can I keep an eye on things in future to ensure his DS doesn't eat anything when the DC are playing together.

I have always told DD not to give out any snacks to friends unless I have permission from their parents but neighbour's reply is really annoying me. It has a lecturing tone to it that doesn't sit well with me and I want to send back a smart response but not sure what to write...

OP posts:
OverTheRainbow88 · 03/04/2021 13:14

I wouldn’t let it bother me. Your DD shouldn’t be giving other kids food- point made, move on.

FortunesFave · 03/04/2021 13:14

I'd write "Ha ha...kids will be kids!" and not respond to any further messages because she sounds unhinged and that message will infuriate her.

JohnWaynesHorse · 03/04/2021 13:14

"I'll just pop to the hardware shop and buy you a grip"

The chap needs to chill a little......

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MiddleParking · 03/04/2021 13:15

God, that would irritate me. I’d maybe say something like “can’t promise that I’m afraid, I’m happy for her to have snacks and share so any extra supervision will need to come from your end!”

growinggreyer · 03/04/2021 13:15

You need to explain to your DD that she is not old enough to decide to feed other people's children and that some children have food allergies that can be fatal - but the child might not know or might not care at that moment. Think about that poor boy that died because another child threw a piece of cheese at him. Teach your child that she did the wrong thing.

ZiggyBaby · 03/04/2021 13:15

No need for a 'smart' response, imo. The neighbours text was fine, and i'm sure many other parents would send similar. Remind your DD again that she shouldn't be doling out food to people.

fussygalore118 · 03/04/2021 13:15

God what a twit.
How big was the bag that the kid couldn't eat his lunch? And at 10 he should be old enough to say no.

I should think your daughter was being polite, shariher crisps tbh. It's up to thekid to say no if offered by another child surely.

Fembot123 · 03/04/2021 13:16

How could a bag of crisps shared between several kids fill his DS up?? He’s just being an arse, his DC at 10 is old enough to say no and if he’s going to do things his parents wouldn’t like then THEY should keep a closer eye on him.

IndecentCakes · 03/04/2021 13:16

How big was this packet of crisps that a fraction of it stopped a kid eating lunch?

Sounds like Daddy is a fun sponge.

Barneybear11 · 03/04/2021 13:16

Blimey. How big was the bag of crisps to fill him up enough to not eat a meal.

VienneseWhirligig · 03/04/2021 13:16

He's old enough at 10 to decline the crisps if he knows he isn't allowed them. She wasn't forcing him.

Fembot123 · 03/04/2021 13:16

@ZiggyBaby

No need for a 'smart' response, imo. The neighbours text was fine, and i'm sure many other parents would send similar. Remind your DD again that she shouldn't be doling out food to people.
Maybe if their DC was a 3 year old.
rainbowthoughts · 03/04/2021 13:17

I don't think he is unreasonable tbh. He doesn't want the kid having snacks and he explained why. Your interpretation of his tone is just that, your interpretation. It might not be the time in which he wrote it. I have an autistic DC who is focused on food and the implications of snacks at the wrong time are huge, so I would be the same.

Bubblesbath · 03/04/2021 13:17

He needs to teach his DS to say no rather than relying on anyone else not to offer his snacks.

Fembot123 · 03/04/2021 13:17

@growinggreyer

You need to explain to your DD that she is not old enough to decide to feed other people's children and that some children have food allergies that can be fatal - but the child might not know or might not care at that moment. Think about that poor boy that died because another child threw a piece of cheese at him. Teach your child that she did the wrong thing.
A NT ten year old knows what they are allergic to! Those kids that threw cheese knew the boy had a dairy allergy. Your post is unfair and ridiculous
Bythemillpond · 03/04/2021 13:18

I would be worrying about why her ds couldn’t eat his lunch after having a couple of crisps.
That doesn’t sound normal.

rainbowthoughts · 03/04/2021 13:18

How big was the bag that the kid couldn't eat his lunch?

Lots of children who struggle with food would be put off a meal if they had eaten. It's not about the amount of food so much the psychological impact.

NotATomato · 03/04/2021 13:19

As if half a bag of crisps would stop a ten year old from eating their lunch.

MiddleParking · 03/04/2021 13:19

@growinggreyer

You need to explain to your DD that she is not old enough to decide to feed other people's children and that some children have food allergies that can be fatal - but the child might not know or might not care at that moment. Think about that poor boy that died because another child threw a piece of cheese at him. Teach your child that she did the wrong thing.
Nah, sorry, I just think that’s nonsense. If your kid can’t control their own allergies at 10 they never will be able to and shouldn’t be playing out. Sharing is the right thing.
Fembot123 · 03/04/2021 13:21

@Bythemillpond

I would be worrying about why her ds couldn’t eat his lunch after having a couple of crisps. That doesn’t sound normal.
It didn’t happen, neighbour obviously just wants to make a point.
Bairnsmum05 · 03/04/2021 13:21

Jeez our neighbours kids used to eat me out of house and home when round. All given lunch and ice lollies in the summer or go up to shop for ice cream.. No big deal.

RonSwansonsChair · 03/04/2021 13:22

I think I'd have to say - I'll remind DD not to share food and you should remind your DS not to eat between meals. I'm sure at 10 he's old enough to know your family rules.

UserTwice · 03/04/2021 13:22

I thought you were going to say that he complained they shouldn't be sharing food due to the Covid risk ..

At 10, my DC would have gone to the local shop and bought their own crisps. Other parent is bonkers. And his child will soon learn effective lying, if his parent goes on being so over protective.

Biscuitsdisappear · 03/04/2021 13:22

I wouldn't respond but if you really want to say that your DD offered the crisps to his son and maybe he/she should teach their DS to say no thank you.

GrumpyHoonMain · 03/04/2021 13:23

@NotATomato

As if half a bag of crisps would stop a ten year old from eating their lunch.
It would if they aren’t used to snacking. It also depends on the crisps - proper crisps like Tyrell’s are often much more filling than Walkers. Or he could have allergies or conditions the neighbour doesn’t want to share. Either way another child doesn’t get to decide to share food like this.
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