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Original poster

Dating as a 55 year old...will men expect me to be bald down below??

194 replies

ConfidenceCrisis44 · 22/02/2021 18:50

Firstly yes, I know I can't date at the moment, I do not want to date at the moment, I am covid safe! Wink

However, I am cautiously looking ahead to the summer. I have been single for 4 years, was married for 20 years before that. In my teens/twenties pubic hair was never much of an issue for anyone, I tidied it a bit to keep it in my pants but that was it! I am aware that things have changed and that a lot of women remove the lot these days. I assumed it was mostly the youngsters. Made the mistake of watching Naked Attraction last night and all the women are bald, even the ones in their 40s, 50s and 60s! I do realise that this is probably not a representative cross section of society, but even so, it has alarmed me. So, does anyone know, what are older men's expectations here?? I really want to stay au naturel! But would be mortified to put someone off because of it!

OP posts:
Original poster
ConfidenceCrisis44 · 22/02/2021 19:23

Encouraging replies! Sounds like I'm over thinking it! Which is what I needed to hear.

HerselfIindoors That's it exactly, its a porn thing in my mind. My ex was into porn...so maybe I've let that get to me more than I realised.

OP posts:
Original poster
ConfidenceCrisis44 · 22/02/2021 19:26

@Wigglegiggle0520

You’re welcome OP.

It’s an interesting first post.

That's my first 'interesting first post!' Grin Been a member of MN for 15 years, name change constantly because I'm super private.
OP posts:
jaffar · 22/02/2021 19:26

It's really not a thing to anyone who matters. Noone even half decent ever paused in sex to make judgement on anything. You're too into the other person to care!

For what it's worth I'm in my 20s now and have found the older I date, the less they have preference and the less influenced by porn they are. My 28yo ex kept himself shaved and so did I. No judgment we just did as it makes some things easier.

My 44yo bf does not shave and neither do I. Again no judgement, but he was baffled when I asked if he had a preference Grin

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Dating General relationships
WomenAndVulvas · 22/02/2021 19:30

To answer your question, yes, some men will expect you to shave it all off. But it doesn't really matter, does it? If they won't sleep with you because you don't shave, then you weren't compatible. Of course it would be painful to be rejected because of your pubic hair, but unfortunately dating comes with the risk of being hurt (for many different reasons). You are overthinking this. Be yourself, it's the only way to find someone who is truly compatible!

PhillipPhillop · 22/02/2021 19:40

@rawalpindithelabrador

If they do tell them to get knotted.
Haha I read that as get knotting! Grin
Bisquiteen · 22/02/2021 19:43

I'm a similar age but I wouldn't let any man 'police' my body I'm afraid, any more than I would believe it was up to me to police his. Sorry if that is no help to you 🙃

LindaEllen · 22/02/2021 19:45

The answer is the same for any age. Do what your like with your own pubic hair.

I don't know why this is even a discussion.

toocold54 · 22/02/2021 19:45

I sometimes go bald for myself (I’m single) I don’t really know why lol but I’d never let a man see me bald I’d feel like a 10 year old. I don’t know any women who are fully bald all of the time.

crystalcherry87 · 22/02/2021 19:47

No I don't think it would be expected unless you were maybe in your early 20s when it seems to be more popular. Some men prefer it, some don't. I reckon the majority don't care. I think as long as it's not really wild down there then you won't have any complaints. But really, it's up to you. If a man forces you to change anything then he's not worth keeping.

Redwinestillfine · 22/02/2021 19:50

I genuinely don't know anyone that is bald in real life, not even my kid sisters generation. I went for a Brazilian once. It was awful. I felt like I wasn't true to myself at all. What ever you decide is fine.

SummerHouse · 22/02/2021 19:50

I totally get you OP. It's scary. I haven't shaved anything for months. I would not personally worry about my bush but I would probably shave my armpits / legs to conform to some weird concept of what's attractive. Same thing really and I don't think that would get quite the same reaction as a question on here.

amusedbush · 22/02/2021 19:54

I’m 30 and got together with DH when we were both 22. I waxed everything off at that time because I believed that was just what everyone did. He actually brought up the fact that he wasn’t a fan of the bald look, which surprised me.

He might regret speaking up now because I go full-on 70s. To quote Sarah Millican: ‘as long as it fits in my pants, even if that means tucking it in’ Grin

lambsandlion · 22/02/2021 19:55

I'm in my 50s fully bald all the time because I prefer it like that. Do NOT shave, as results are painful and itchy! Waxed off professionally every 4 weeks or so...how I long for restrictions to be eased on beauty treatments!

ShowOfHands · 22/02/2021 20:01

I get why you're asking op. My close friend is 50 and recently returned to dating. And yes she's encountered the attitude you fear. She has no interest in shaving so won't but is there an expectation from some men? Yes. Are they blunt about it? Yes. So they imply public hair is dirty? Yes. It's definitely a thing.

sabrinathemiddleagewitch · 22/02/2021 20:02

I understand your question OP.

You're not asking what to do with yours in an exact sense, but rather if what you do is the norm now?

On TV and porn they have few public hairs. Among my friends (early 30's) this is not the norm in long term relationships. We maybe did to begin with, landing strips triangles whatever but now just tidy and occasionally think sod it and shave it all off. But never for a man. I wonder if this is age related or society being more accepting now that it was 10 years ago?

Pubes are coming back in, more models have pubes and some parts of porn have more public hair. If you asked this between 2010-2015 it would be a completely different answer.

I would tidy it up, maybe a public triangle if that's what you like?

ShowOfHands · 22/02/2021 20:03

*pubic

Even autocorrect doesn't like it!

Brownteddybear · 22/02/2021 20:04

Well do you expect men to be bald too? Just do what the men do. You'll be fine.

Rebelwithverysharpclaws · 22/02/2021 20:13

Men have no right to an opinion on the appearance of my front bottom. Its hairy as fuck.Grin

Shrivelled · 22/02/2021 20:13

He might be more worried about himself being bald up top.

🤣

mindutopia · 22/02/2021 20:19

I’m 40 and in my personal experience, it’s never been an expectation even in my generation. I’ve never had a man so much as remark about it, let alone take issue. I would assume that a single man in his 50s to 60s would probably just be grateful for the opportunity to get that close to your pubic area.

jessycake · 22/02/2021 20:24

I think they are all bald so that you can get a good close up of their bits on that show

Crumpetsandhoney · 22/02/2021 20:25

I think men who grew up before the Internet are less bothered about a full Bush, a landing strip, or a nudes one. Its younger ones who have a preference but its not stopped any of them dtd

AllFrightOnTheNight · 22/02/2021 20:26

It's your preference that matters here.

Chimeraforce · 22/02/2021 20:26

Crikey they should be grateful to get that close

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 22/02/2021 20:28

Bush is back, however most men couldn’t give a shit. Be you op